Favorite Nursing Sayings, Quotes, Jokes..... - page 2

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Nurses, what are your favorite nursing sayings, quotes, jokes? We are looking to make more fun images to share on our facebook pages.......Nurses Rock, allnurses.com, and Nursing Students. We'd love to hear your ideas. If... Read More


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    I work nights and I often get patients who dislike being disturbed and whinge when I come in.

    things like nurse I am trying to get some sleep do you have to keep waking me?? My reply is "you don't come to hospital for a rest that's for when you go home".

    Or taking those endless obs during the night "I need to see if your ticker is still pumping" tends to lighten the mood somewhat.

    Nurse you are so good looking "darling you are 97 years old, sight impaired to the point of not being able to move without help but I love the compliment anyway"

    I am so sorry to call you but I need to go to the toilet. " Mrs M this is the 3rd time in 15 mins, I really don't think so (no UTI just lonely) however why don't I get you a bedpan or commode? No nurse I will just go to sleep now..

    The endless dementia pt's who run rampant through the ward ripping their clothes off on their way home to the farm to milk the cows, or those who are in bed and screaming I just want to go to bed.. "Mr S you are in bed let's just get you settled" really? "Yes really."

    Nurse stop making me laugh. "that's what I am paid for, it's far better then the garbage they fill you up with 6 times a day. Besides, it'll get you home faster.."

    Nurse I have no idea where I am or why. " depending on the age of the pt I often reply with "me too, looks like we are in the same place but at least we are together" Some nights that's just the way it is.

    Nurse is it time to get up now? (2300pm) can I make you a cup of tea? "No, I just need you to lie down, relax and get ready for your day nap." If only pts slept at night!

    Listen up if you are going to get sick or die you cannot do it until 0716. Why?? "because I go home at 0715" On the dot I have lost quite a few pt's and as we all know the paperwork is endless.. and everyone is in the middle of handover so I can't escape..
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    "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity. An optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." -- Winston Churchill
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    Here is a nurse's saying I found funny:

    When my mom was dying from a glioblastoma, she was on hospice. The nurses who took care of her were (typically) wonderful. We became especially close to her case manager, Angela, who was always professional, but very caring. Mom could become very demanding, probably mostly because she had lost control of so many things, including the left side of her body. Angela told us that around the office, they called that "Give a Mouse a Cookie" syndrome. Give a mouse a cookie, they need a glass of milk, etc.

    It made light of a difficult situation, and made me think of "Give a Mouse a Cookie", while dealing with patients with lots of cascading requests.


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