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Too much estrogen! Women! Ahh!



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No. 10
Old Apr 21, 2009, 12:18 AM

Default Re: Too much estrogen! Women! Ahh!
Originally Posted by mochabean View Post
I think this is absolutely silly. You didn't intend to hurt her, you apologized once, and if she doesn't accept it, then that's her problem. If she didn't want anyone to see a picture of her making funny faces, she shouldn't have taken the picture in the first place. But it's no big deal, people make funny faces all the time. What if this girl gets her photo taken for a work badge and she thinks the photo makes her look goofy? Is she going to to cover the photo up with a bunch of stickers? I wouldn't want to be friends with someone like that either. Her insecurity is not your problem, so just drop it and move on.
One week after incident:

The general consensus among myself and other peers who witnessed her dramatic display is that she overreacted, and most responses were similar to the one's expressed here. While I do feel bad about her feelings being hurt, I just can't have too much pity - she understands my personality, but is very insecure. I figured that the first time I met her, but had no idea to the degree.

By the way, the picture was her crossed eyed, except the camera caught her with one eye looking straight ahead and the other toward her nose. I still think it's funny and cute, but whatever! Don't pose for pictures you'll later regret.
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No. 11
from dnp2004
Old Apr 24, 2009, 01:07 AM

Default Re: Too much estrogen! Women! Ahh!
Based on what you originally posted, I must say she is emotionally unstable, immature and can't take a joke. That drama queen is not worth apologizing to because you did nothing wrong. I can't believe anyone would side with her and say you are insensitive!

I can tell you from decades of experience as a women, a military nurse supervisor and later as a physician, that if she does not grow up fast, she will not make it in medicine. Don't even worry about her hurt feelings at this point. If you make further apologies, bow, scrape, tell her she is beautiful, etc. You will contributing to her bad behavior. SO DON'T DO THAT!!!

That being said, be careful with using the term "too much estrogen". It can be offensive because it is used to propagate negative stereotypes about women such as:
  • They are overly emotional.
  • Their behavior is controlled by their menstrual cycle.
  • They can't judge objectively and thus can't be leaders.
  • Procreation is what drives them.
The above stereotypes made it harder for me and other women to be respected as physicians and military officers years ago. So as medical professionals and citizens of our society we should avoid using this term. Likewise we should never make an off-the-cuff comment about a man, or men having "too much testosterone" because it is equally offensive. Obviously it is based on negative stereotypes as well such as:
  • They are oversexed predators.
  • They are all aggressive and violent.
  • They categorically lack communications skills.
  • They aren't emotionally "in-tuned" or compassionate.
These "testosterone" stereotypes can make it harder for male health care providers (especially male nurses) to be viewed without suspicion by their female colleagues. I imagine you guys must feel like I did when I was frequently the only women in my medically classes. Back then I had male doctors/professors who hated me for entering in their male dominated profession. The difference is that back then they would make blunt comments to my face without fear of retribution. At least I knew where they stood.

When I did the old med school rounds to see male patients needing intimate examinations and/or treatments, my instructors would typically ask, "do you mind her working on you". It was not about patient confront, it was a ploy used to coax the male patient in to asking me to leave the the room. Yet from what I know, they never asked a male patient this question when a female nurse was in-training, only us female doctors.

So guys don't give up, positive change is happening much faster for you then it did for me
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No. 12
from debertda
Old Apr 24, 2009, 12:13 PM

Default Re: Too much estrogen! Women! Ahh!
If you can't laugh at yourself, then what can you laugh at? Of course I would have been embarrased but I would have gotten even (in a fun way of course)
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