Quote from sydneyxmoon
So I'm new at this nursing thing and I got a job at a skilled nursing facility. Ive been working there for three months and the last two months I feel like vomiting every time I know I have to go in. I get panic attacks where I start hyperventilating and bust out crying because I don't want to do it. I'm on call and haven't been picking up because I don't want to go in. Once I'm there, I'm there I have to do it. But sometimes in the middle of passing medication I wanna quit, go home or start crying. Although I don't, its really hitting me emotionally, making problems between me and my spouse and my parents are worried about me because i threatened to kill myself because I hate what I do. Is it the fact that maybe my area in nursing is too stressful for me and maybe I should move into home care? I don't know has anyone felt like this before? I'm 22 and this is actually my first real job so...I don't know it really sucks to feel this way. Its like a big nasty hole in my stomach and it messes me up big time!
I'm a fairly new nurse also. I've worked in "Hospitals" for years as a cert. Endoscopy Tech., a phlebotomist and also as an EKG/ monitor tech so I have quite a bit of healthcare exp. but never in long term care untill now. Unfortunately, in NJ decent paying LPN jobs are only in LTC. I started working in November 2011 at one of the best facilities in my area and can honestly say that I HATE it with a passion!
I dread having to go to work. About a month ago i applied for a perdiem position in an acute care Hospital on thier inpatient Hospice unit and I LOVE it!!! Its about $2.00 less per hour but Its worth it. Its completely different. Its actually like "Hospital nursing". Maybe you should try applying for something less stressfull like maybe in a clinic in the hospital or an office ar maybe even a planned parenthood. "Nursing Homes" Skilled nursing, Long Term Care , whatever u call it, Is very stressfull, the Med pass is very heavy and we wont even talk about when thier preparing for state inspections! It's a nightmare. Sounds like you have alot on your plate. Try lightening the load by finding a more relaxed job. Good luck to you....