I just graduated in May from an ADN program. I was hired prn at a local LTC facility. The job market is scarce and I am desperate to take whatever I can get. 5 new grad/new hires including myself got a whole 4 days of orientation and only 2 of those out on the floor. One has already been hired as a 11p to 7a full time charge nurse, one got a full time 3p to 11p shift, and the other got a full time weekend shift. My supervisor tells me, after only TWO DAYS in a new nursing environment that my skills are not up to par, so I got none of the promotions and am still PRN, which really is fine, I guess, because clearly I'm not ready to be tossed to the wolves with no oversight for 30 patients with 20 medications apiece as well as peg tubes, wound care, feedings, etc. However, my boss made me feel like I was 1/2 an inch tall. He made me feel as if I was a substandard nurse and not nearly as good as the others I was hired with. I am somewhat sensitive and I began to tear up, but I did NOT cry. He said "are you tearing up?" with incredulous disgust. I said I was simply tired and I am no crybaby. I graduated with honors and externed at a large hospital. Something about this boss makes me nervous and when he watches me I make stupid mistakes. I don't know how to shake this, and show this guy that I can be a good and capable nurse. I also think it's a bit much to ask anyone to go out on a floor and handle 30 patients after 2 days on the floor. What do you guys think?
P.S. I thought I loved nursing but this experience is making me feel as if I've made a terrible mistake.