Accommodating a crazed family - page 2

What do you all think of this. I have a resident who is the sweetest, happiest, most positive lady ever. She never complains, has mild cognitive issues but can make her own choices and has NOT been deemed incompetent. My problem... Read More

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    Deja Vu! - I experienced a very similar scenario with a resident of a dementia unit a few years ago.The family just did not get it.She also had DJD which caused painful ambulation and she had mild dementia.The son wanted us to make her walk the halls for exercise and the daughter wanted her on a strict diet.But-THEY never set limits with her-so if we would have put her on a diet (which we did not do) they would have blown it with the Wednesday night hot fudge Sunday and the Saturday afternoon home made fudge....And the Tuesday eclairs and the Thursday donuts...But the weight gain was our fault...righto...I do not believe in strict diets for these people-food is one of their only pleasures.....I hate giving handsful of meds to 99 yr old ladies,too.....And restorative ambulating them down the hall-with max assist of 3-crying all the way...What is up with that?
    Last edit by ktwlpn on Aug 5, '02

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    Well, i took your advice and suggested we call in the ombudsman. This was rapidly nixed by the administrator. No rationale was given, of course. I also suggested the SSD do a follow up MMSE. She scored a 28/30. Does this sound like a woman who can't make choices? Maybe I am making too much out of this. I am most concerned with the idea the crazy daughter has consulted an attorney. Our documentation on this lady is right on top of things. I am so proud of the crew for such good notes, from dietary to nursing to activities. But, in our line of work the mere mention of "lawyer" sends everyone in a tizzy. Well, the countdown to Saturday is on. Thanks for all your replies.

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    OK.... :angel2: The Surveyor Speaks! The Daughter's desires are not what the resident wants. By putting this resident on a diet because the family wants is just like putting on a restraint because the family wants. Has the Physician documented no medical indication warranting a weight reduction? Has the RD reviewed her record to determine if the weight loss is warranted? In comparison to her PAST NORMAL BODY WEIGHT, what is her weight now? What would the benefits be if the resident lost weight? What would be the negative effects of the weight loss? How would the resident react to being put on a diet against her will? Let her know while you guys appreciate her concern, until the resident's health becomes a concern because of the weight, the facility cannot put a resident on a weight reduction diet at this time. Maybe coming upwith a compromise to not gain anymore would be in the best interes for all. Good Luck!
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    Good luck tomorrow Bandaidexpert.I can't wait to hear how it all plays out.I would not hesitate to make an anonymous call to the ombudsman if I felt that the resident's own wishes and best interests were being ignored.I do wonder what kind of childhood this daughter had-maybe this is her way of controlling her mother and "making her pay" Even though it had no bearing on how she can treat her mother at the home....Gotta love these families that make the resident a pawn....
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    catsrule, I always appreciate your input. Yes, RD has been invloved, Yes MD has documented no medical issues secondary to weight gain. The DON, myself, SSD, Activities,and Dietary met with the resident today. She understands what her daughter wants, but cognitive issues limit recall. She goes to DR next morning and demands a danish, eggs, bacon, toast and 3 glasses of cranberry juice. I am just so ticked that our team is jumping because "lawyer' was mentioned. I will deal with it just as I do everyday, but damn.

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