Thinking About Having Another Baby...

[cdietrich404]

Off and on for a few months now, I have had the baby bug bite me.

My situation: I am 28, almost 29. I am in school, taking my pre-reqs for nursing.

My kids are ds 8, dd 6, ds 3 and ds 2.

I had a tummy tuck last April along with a breast augmentation. Needless to say I didnt think I would feel this way now. Had I known, I would have waited.

There are women who do have babies after having the tummy tuck sx.

I had to have a c section with #4 due to him being in a breech postition and my water breaking at 34 weeks. My OB cut me up and down inside which means I will have to have another c section. I had a bad recovery. I had a spinal headache which was deadly, not really but completely miserable. All in all I prefer a lady partsl birth. For me it is so much more enjoyable. But there is nothing i can do about that.

We also are having financial problems, we dont even have medical insurance at the moment. We have it for the kids, just not me and dh.

My little one is 2, turned 2 in November. I prefer smaller gaps.

I would like to have 2 more real close to each other.

Several of my classes are online so that helps.

Any thoughts?

Dh is not completely against the idea, he just wishes I would have waited on the surgery since it was really expensive.

Thanks for reading if you made it this far

Cheryl

mommy to 4

[ChargeNurseAmy74]

Best wishes! Nursing school, along with motherhood, is a personal choice of where, how, when. I have 3 children, 16 yrs old, 9 yrs old & 8 yrs old, and hubby wants another... My last child was very difficult with full bedrest, placenta previa, bleeding since the 7th week, finally born at 28weeks with an emergency c-section (from navel down to pelvis) resulting in that if I ever want another its another c-section. ewww. They said the chance of me having another premature birth is 50%, I don't think I can handle that again. My son was so expensive, he cost over 1/4 million. I would be in debt FOREVER if I didnt' have medical insurance. You had mentioned having a c-csection, isnt' that over $10,000 with everything anyways? *not including any complications that may arise*, I had no clue I'd have such complications with my last child, so not having insurance I think would be a risky gamble!

As far as the tummy tuck & breast augmentation, whew...I think my old man would be a lil off the charts after spending all the money then deciding children again LOL. I just got accepted to my nursing school of choice, and will start in 5weeks. You said you still have some pre-reqs to do, are you going for LVN or RN? How close are you?

Take care...

[cdietrich404]

I would go for my RN. I have eight or nine classes before I can apply.

Cheryl

[NurseJeanB]

Cheryl,

It sounds like you have already made up your mind to have 6 kids and if that is the case, then maybe you are better off having them now. I think people are surprised, because these days, more often then not, the choice is to have smaller families. I myself have one child, but was not able to have more. I maybe would have had one more if I could. Now the number of children you choose to have is totally up to you and your dh, but I would make sure that it is something you talk to him further about. Not being opposed to and being 100% behind are really different things. It sounds like you are already weighing pros and cons. Please also consider that even though you have online classes now, you won't when you are in nursing school. Also some of the prereqs like Anatomy and Physiology cannot be taken online. I don't know what your daycare plans are, but with 4 kids you probably already have worked out that end of things, and I think you already know that children are expensive (I have one and he already is busting our budget). I am currently in nursing school and am not able to work. If you have decided you are going to have two more then having them now as opposed to later may be best. Nursing school is very time consuming. I am constantly struggling to balance study time and time with my family. My son is very active in soccer and so making sure he always has clean uniforms for daily practice and 2 different sets of uniforms for game days (uniform, sweats, shinguards, cleats... it is never ending) and that I can go to all his soccer games is very challenging. In fact this week, I have finals and he has games today and Wednesday. I have a friend who has 3 kids. Next quarter she has to be in clinicals from 7-12 a.m. on three days, and this means she won't be able to get her kids up and off to school. She is seriously considering quitting the program. We had very little control over the schedule which we were given. Nursing school is also very hard, the group of people admitted averaged a 3.8 gpa. Now the class average is a low B and I have had several people tell me they were always A students and now have to accept being a B student and some are struggling to maintain a C (if you get lower you are out of the program) The people who are struggling the hardest are those that have to work or have a lot of outside pressures. I am not trying to talk you in or out of any decisions. I am just letting you know how my experience of nursing school has been so far. I wish you best of luck on whatever you decide.

[WDWpixieRN, RN]

It does sound like you have made up your mind.

I will say something similar to what another poster mentioned -- you won't easily get over the feelings of wanting additional babies -- EVER.

I am 51 and had my last child when I was 31. Phew, was I glad that was over!!

But I have gone through phases where I thought, gosh, just one more baby...they're so cute, etc., etc....I don't know if that ever really goes away. I think it's the realization that that phase of your life is OVER and it's kind of sad....and scary.

Nursing school is hard and hopefully you've got the support and backing for you to be able to do this with a tussle of kids!! Obviously my youngest child is grown and off to college, but even with 2 grandchildren who don't live with me and my 3 kids, I have a difficult time keeping up with everything that I HAVE to do (school) as well as what I WANT to do (family/friends)!!

Best wishes!

[cdietrich404]

Cheryl,

It sounds like you have already made up your mind to have 6 kids and if that is the case, then maybe you are better off having them now. I think people are surprised, because these days, more often then not, the choice is to have smaller families. I myself have one child, but was not able to have more. I maybe would have had one more if I could. Now the number of children you choose to have is totally up to you and your dh, but I would make sure that it is something you talk to him further about. Not being opposed to and being 100% behind are really different things. It sounds like you are already weighing pros and cons. Please also consider that even though you have online classes now, you won't when you are in nursing school. Also some of the prereqs like Anatomy and Physiology cannot be taken online. I don't know what your daycare plans are, but with 4 kids you probably already have worked out that end of things, and I think you already know that children are expensive (I have one and he already is busting our budget). I am currently in nursing school and am not able to work. If you have decided you are going to have two more then having them now as opposed to later may be best. Nursing school is very time consuming. I am constantly struggling to balance study time and time with my family. My son is very active in soccer and so making sure he always has clean uniforms for daily practice and 2 different sets of uniforms for game days (uniform, sweats, shinguards, cleats... it is never ending) and that I can go to all his soccer games is very challenging. In fact this week, I have finals and he has games today and Wednesday. I have a friend who has 3 kids. Next quarter she has to be in clinicals from 7-12 a.m. on three days, and this means she won't be able to get her kids up and off to school. She is seriously considering quitting the program. We had very little control over the schedule which we were given. Nursing school is also very hard, the group of people admitted averaged a 3.8 gpa. Now the class average is a low B and I have had several people tell me they were always A students and now have to accept being a B student and some are struggling to maintain a C (if you get lower you are out of the program) The people who are struggling the hardest are those that have to work or have a lot of outside pressures. I am not trying to talk you in or out of any decisions. I am just letting you know how my experience of nursing school has been so far. I wish you best of luck on whatever you decide.

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply with such great advice.

Cheryl