Not a people person... (Yikes!)

Folkeye · May 2, 2014

Well, that all depends on where you end up. Are you the first line of dealing with patients when they come in the door, or are you by a surgeons side while the patient is blissfully unaware of you? I do think you need some communication and people skills (empathy helps!) but don't need to be a huge 'people person'. I do believe you need to be compassionate and remember that your patients are all individuals. If you have 10 complaints of stomach pain from 10 different people.... you need to be people person enough to not treat them like 'Oh, no. Not another one....' (tune brain out here). You need people savvy skills to keep it professional, even when you've heard the same thing way too many times in one shift. If they want to be chatty, know how to mask your frustration with somebody who you might consider to be wasting your time. Hopefully wanting to work with people and help them with their ailments was part of motivation for nursing, not just a paycheck.

I'm not a nurse, I'm hoping after my pre-reqs that I'll still want to pursue nursing. I've shadowed my mom where she works and I've mentioned this to her before. I know it's a long day, I know it gets same ol' same ol' sometimes. But remember, patients are people too (well, most the time! :) )

So yeah, that type of people skill.

OhLookASquirrel · May 26, 2014

I'm not a "people person". I'm awkward and have almost crippling social anxiety.

But I am great with patients. For some reason that has always come naturally to me. The nurse-patient relationship is unique. It's a different dynamic than what most people are use to.

Much like public speaking (which, again, I'm great at, but try to talk to me about the weather and I want to run and hide) the people who are super talkative and extroverted aren't always the best at it. The people who talk constantly are often the ones who choke in these situations, because it's not the same. It's a completely different skill set.

ambb1993 · May 26, 2014

YES. being a people person is not only about the patient, but about the staff, your managers, etc. Communication is key. This profession is not something where you go into the job and do your part, and go home.. You have to communicate with others, plan, etc. You don't have to necessarily be a people person, but be willing to communicate to GET THE JOB DONE.

kbrownstewart · May 27, 2014

Communication is a vital function of a nurse's job. She/he has to have interpersonal skills to interact with the team to make decisions and inform patients of their conditions. Patient's need to feel they can trust their nurse and she is empathetic and caring. If you lack interpersonal skills maybe you should take more communication and psychology classes.

fugu08 · Jul 16, 2014

That seems to me to be a false dichotomy. One can be both a people person and a task person. However, you can't spend time 'schmoozing' then compromise the time you have to get things done.

fugu08 · Jul 16, 2014

I'm working as a nurse's aide while I'm in nursing school and I'm learning about this nurse/paitent dynamic. Do you have any more thoughts?

NewYorkerGirl · Jul 28, 2014

I'm not a people person either, so I gravitated toward OR nursing in nursing school and requested to be in the OR as much as possible. That's when I realized doctors are the worst humans on earth, and it sent me scrambling back to the bedside. LOL! Lesson learned. But night shift is the perfect place for me, just as I'm hitting my people-limit, they usually go to sleep and I can spend an hour or two charting and re-charging my batteries for the 5 and 6 AM battle where I have to wake them up to give morning meds. Still better than dealing with surgeons!

Cheyenne RN,BSHS · Oct 6, 2014

I'm meekly raising my hand. . .I am definitely not a people person.
I am an introvert who does not necessarily enjoy meeting new people, although I put on my game face for patients and their families. Also, I'm not the nurse who seeks validation or needs to 'be needed' by others. People say I'm quiet. I'm task-oriented and often create a 'to do' list when each shift begins.
Small talk annoys me, but I will chat with overly talkative patients and family members. I am serious and lack a sense of humor to the point that I take some jokes literally. I have a restricted affect, intermittent eye contact, and I do not smile that much because my smiles come across as phony and contrived.
It took several years of working as a nurse to figure out that my interpersonal skills were problematic and that I wasn't much of a people person. Yes, I seriously lacked self-awareness.

Your entire entry could have easily been mine. I am not a social butterfly and feel terribly uncomfortable in relaxed meetings, awkward in any size group, and have panic attacks in a crowd. However when the role is well defined such as in the nurse/patient or physician/nurse interaction I am fine. Most people assume I am just easy to talk to and I seem to attract "chatty cathys" but it is really that I feel I don't have anything interesting or intelligent to add to the conversation.

I sort of get lost after an exchange of information. When a conversation becomes informal I get quiet and just try to smile and look pleasant. I am not a people person but I am a really good nurse. My sense of humor is literal and visual, I can mentally picture a situation someone may be describing and my internal visuals are often much funnier than they should be and I break out laughing.

julia_nneji · Oct 5, 2017

I'm meekly raising my hand. . .I am definitely not a people person.
I am an introvert who does not necessarily enjoy meeting new people, although I put on my game face for patients and their families. Also, I'm not the nurse who seeks validation or needs to 'be needed' by others. People say I'm quiet. I'm task-oriented and often create a â€˜to do' list when each shift begins.
Small talk annoys me, but I will chat with overly talkative patients and family members. I am serious and lack a sense of humor to the point that I take some jokes literally. I have a restricted affect, intermittent eye contact, and I do not smile that much because my smiles come across as phony and contrived.
It took several years of working as a nurse to figure out that my interpersonal skills were problematic and that I wasn't much of a people person. Yes, I seriously lacked self-awareness.

This is me right here. Sometimes people mistake such personality for being cold and probably mean but it's not intentional. I'm very good with patients however but I find it hard to mix too much with my colleagues. I'm all about getting my work done , making sure my patients are okay and off I go. I work in an LTCF

mrnurse543210 · Aug 9, 2018

Not a people person, although relationships are a meaningful part of life. It's just that I'd dont get much out of interactions with strangers. You can only open up so much. Nonetheless I'm good at being fake and putting on a face. I think for some types of nursing you should at least be able to do that.

TheDudeWithTheBigDog, ADN, RN · Aug 10, 2018

I think being "a people person" is not necessarily a weakness in healthcare, but somewhat of a disadvantage. You more easily form a bond beyond that caregiver / patient dynamic. You're more likely to show negative emotions (sadness, sympathy, etc.) towards a patient. There's more of a chance that you're the type of person that goes "aww, you poor thing." to an 80 year who wants to be talked to like an adult. EVERYONE in healthcare should be empathetic and comforting, but I think that needs to be the limit.

Basically the difference between asking a dying patient what you can do for their comfort or who they need you to contact or if they want to talk to someone vs being in their room crying and telling them how sad it makes you.