psych legal question

[BeenThereDoneThat74, MSN, RN]

hi

wasn't sure how to title this (or what forum it belonged in).

any personal or professional advice is appreciated.

i am going through a divorce. married for 7 years, separated for 1. know him for about 10 yrs. i was married before him (for 2 yrs), met him while i was still married. let me go in order.

married mistake #1 almost 12 yrs ago. 2 months later, failed nclex . lost the job i had lined up (back then they didn't keep you on to give you another chance, there was no shortage then). now i need to figure how to support myself and my husband (who was in law school). a week later, just when i thought it couldn't get any worse, my brother committed suicide. so, things weren't so hot for me. walked around in a fog for about a year, passed nclex 6 months later, could not get a job in the hospital again for another 3 years (believe me, i tried). worked in homecare, hated it, felt like i was faking it ('cause i never got that hospital experience i needed). went from one homecare job to another, miserable with each one. in this time, i made no attempt to mourn the loss of my brother, and my marriage suffered as well. i don't blame him completely, although he made little effort to be with me, console me, etc. he had no idea what i was going through. he had a dysfunctional family, so could not appreciate the loss i was experiencing. he was never there for me. so, then i meet mistake #2, in the midst of my vulnerability (you can probably see where this is going...)

so out with the old, in with the new. the one who is going to take care of me :chuckle :chuckle i completely let him into my life, married him (he loved me!!). so i was okay with that. i thought i found someone i could communicate with. i then started going to therapy, b/c he strongly advised it, and i agreed. i was miserable. it wasn't the divorce that was the issue, it was mostly the work thing, and my brother. this was now 2 yrs after, and hadn't really addressed it. of course i was worried that i may be predisposed to the same thing he was. i was depressed, no doubt about it. i admitted it (just not to my parents, 'cause they wouldn't have been able to deal with it). started taking paxil (which didn't work), was seeing a psychiatrist (which was the wrong choice, but what did i know, i could barely get out of bed, let alone find an appropriate healthcare provider). stopped going to him, switched to a psychotherapist (msw) who was awesome. she really got through to me. saw her for at least a year, then every once in a while. my husband even admitted that she was perfect for me. i got it together. we got married during this time, finally got my hospital job, was going back to school, got pregnant, had our daughter. by the time i had my daughter, things were good. i weaned myself off the paxil way before we even got pregnant. my therapist said she didn't think i really needed it. life was good.

fast forward 5 yrs, he wants to end the marriage. out of left field, imo. he said i should have seen it coming. that was a year ago. it has been the worst year of my life- worse than the past, but have been able to deal with it better than before. i have no choice- i have a child now. i have to support myself and her, can't live with my parents (don't want to), need to finish grad school, and all that. i can't crawl into a hole like i did last time, and i don't want to (at least i didn't want to).

here's the point of my post: (finally). he tells me last night that he has a new lawyer, and he mentioned "my past" to him. what does this mean? that he is planning (or just theatening) to use that against me. since we separated a year ago, i've been waiting for this. i think i know the answer to this (as i wait for my attorney to call me back), but i want to know if he has any chance of using this against me. i don't think he can access my records right? (this was pre-hipaa), and my second therapist has literally fallen off the face of the earth (or i'd be back there again).

also, i (obviously) need to go back to therapy. as a professional, i can justify my reasons for seeking therapy, but what might the courts think? i am doing this to better myself and to insure my mental health and wellness, but is that stigma still there? i would love to take a med (that works), but i'm cautious right now.

very long post, i know. but i could really use some advice. thanks

[sirI, MSN, APRN, NP]

Hello, nurse educate,

I am so very sorry things are like this for you.

But, the members of Allnurses.com cannot give you any legal and/or medical advice.

Please, call your therapist and advise him/her of all that's going on. And, please contact your attorney for the legal advice you need. They are the only ones who should be advising you now.

This must be so hard for you. We wish you luck and hope all turns out o.k. for you.