Dealing with family

Nurses General Nursing

Published

How do you deal with family?

I generally don't mind them and tell them what "I" can. I ask the patient if it is ok to talk with their family unless they have dementia. I don't tell test results unless they have a CXR and it showed nothing otherwise I tell them they need to speak with the doctor and I can leave a note on the front of the chart for the doctor with their contact information.

Some families can be overbearing. I worked Tuesday and Wednesday. Had the same patients both days. On Tuesday I received no less than 10 calls inquiring about the same patient. I am sorry this patient has 4 living daughters and 1 son but there has to be ONE person that is the main contact who is calling to see how the patient is doing. A couple of the calls I never got to take. Near the end of the day I was talking to one of the daughters and told her I was receiving an excessive amount of phone calls and there needed to be one point of contact. Of course she said she would be the point of contact. The second day I had talked to the main daughter which I had no problem with. Then I received a call from one of the granddaughters. The secretary told her I was extremely busy and wouldn't be able to give her any information but she still wanted to speak with me. I got on the phone and told her that she was resting and doing fine but I couldn't give any further informaion and she would need to speak with her aunt since that is my point of contact. She hung up on me which I didn't care about. She came up to the hospital later and told me it was unprofessional how I handled it and she has a right to know what is going on with her grandmother - blah, blah, blah. I explained I can't give information out for privacy reasons (she says there is no privacy). I stated it is hospital policy and I spoke with her aunt and she is the main point of contact and can get her info from her. She was arguing with me that she is not able to just be by the phone. I stated that this was a family issue and we would not be able to speak with everyone who called and it was excessive.

The way I see it is that when I keep getting interrupted this is taking away from the care I am providing. It is extremely busy and I have to go off the floor with certain patients for tests, perform procedures, pass meds, do assessments, etc.

Also one of the patients other daughters was there earlier and I explained the situation with this granddaughter and she agreed with me. She immediately knew which granddaughter it was and just rolled her eyes at me.

Just looking for some feedback on how you deal with family.

Kelly

your plan works great with reasonable families. unfortunately, not all families are reasonable!

this is where i am blessed to have a supervisor that steps in and is happy to do so, unlike some of the nm i have read about on here she is on the floor and will happily run interfearence

Specializes in Mixed Level-1 ICU.

"The way I see it is that when I keep getting interrupted this is taking away from the care I am providing."

Be careful not to fall into the, "They're keeping me from my patients," excuse.

For it is you who are keeping yourself from your patients. You must set the priorities.

Stop taking the calls. Choose a family spokesperson and stick with him/her..and be unwaveringly consistent.

Of course, when the family cannot agree(uncommon) get the doctor involved!

There's nothing that says only the nurses must coordinate everything. After all, though you've just spent 20 minutes telling them everything, very often the family will then want to speak with the m.d.

And if you're not sure of the situation, don't even get into it...that's a recipe for a mis-informational disaster. Put it into the m.d.'s lap. It's his job to talk to families and don't let him weasel out of it.

I went to see my grandmother in the hospital years ago and asked her nurse how she was doing. The nurse snapped, "You need to ask your aunt if you want to know that, Honey!". She also started walking in the opposite direction as she was saying this. I thought she was the biggest witch in the world!!! If she had offered a simple explaination, that would have been nice and I would have understood just fine. Maybe there should be some sort of handout explaining the family spokesperson thing if there isn't already one. Some people may just not know. ;)

Specializes in Mixed Level-1 ICU.

That nurse should have been reported!

Too many nurses forget who is working for whom

Setting limits does not mean acting in an un-professional manner.

Setting limits is professional behavior. Otherwise you will be pulled every which way. And, at the end of the day, you will be targeted for not having been organized when all is not done.

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