So I graduated 2009 and have been working for 7 months. I keep telling myself that I love it because I'm learning so much, but I really hate Med/Surg. I feel like I'm lying to myself and one supevisor told me I came across aloof until she got to know me. Then she realized I was just quiet by nature, this was the same supervisor that told me I was not organized. There is always a bit of truth to every comment, but as a new grad I already feel that I don't know what I'm doing half the time.
I have 5 patients on average and feel like I never get out on time and don't get paid for it, because I feel it's my fault for not charting in a timely mannor so I punch out on time to avoid OT. Every time I start to feel good about myself someting knocks me right back on my ass. I got a complaint, probably more because the supervisor sent out an email to the floor stating we should get good and bad negative feed back that the patients send via hospital surveys. And I got a note that made me look stuiped and unsure of what I was doing.
I was really embarrassed and felt awful that the patient perceived me this way. I started obsessing over it and haven't been able to sleep, I'm starting to question if I come across like that to everyone? Do I come across unorganized, aloof, like I don't care, or unknowledgeable? Does anyone else feel like this? Do I really know what the hell I'm talking about or doing?