When it rains, it pours...

[Adam D. RN2005]

Yesterday, two of my patients expired. In the same room 9 hours apart from each other. I felt honored when the first family saw me walk in yesterday morning and asked me to be the patients nurse.

The first one passed away at 9:15 yesterday morning. The patient was on a Morphine Drip, and when I assessed him at 9, he had just started showing the Cheney-Stokes breathing. I was expecteing it to be that he was going to pass away in several hours.

At 9:15, a family member came out and got me. No heart tones or pulses. He went quickly. We were all expectinging him to hang on for at least another day. The family stated that he was a stuborn man and felt he was going to hold on.This was my second patient that had expired in the 9 months of my RN career.

At 1615, I took report on another patient with a rather large family that was going into the same room. I would be starting the morhpine drip. At 1630, the patient and family arrived. I got the morphine drip started at 2ml/hr. At 1710, I bumped it up to 3ml/hr. Pt was in visible distress. That seemed to comfort her. Family called me in the room at 1750, she was in some distress again, I asked the pt if she wanted me to increase the rate again, she gave me a slow nod. I bumped it up to 4ml/hr. At 1800, a family member came out and got me. Did not say a word, just put his hand on my shoulder, I knew, and everyone in my unit knew as well, that my second patient of the day expired.

Patient had no heart sound or pulses. I called the Doctor. Once the body was released, I did my second post mortom.

Both of the families yesterday thanked me for both the care and compassion I had demonstrated during their familly member's final hours. I felt honored and privledged to be that nurse. And touched by their comments.

I love my job. I have seen so much in the past 9 months. I have become effient and assertive. And I feel that I am doing nothing special. I feel that I am just doing my job to the best of my ability. I am just trying to be the best nurse that I can be.

I don't let the stress of the day get to me (It is not worth it.) and at the end of the day, I leave my emotions of the day on the floor where they belong and I go home.

I love my job, and I enjoy the days that I work. Bye for now.

Adam, RN

[indigo girl]

It is the biggest honor to be able to assist a dying person and his family in this passage. It's a really big deal, Adam, to be able to do so with such grace. Those families will never forget what you did for their loved ones. Obviously, you are doing the work you are meant to be doing.

[clee1]

God bless you Adam.

I have followed your "new-nurse" posts for some time now. I hope I turn out to be the nurse you seem to have become.

Chris, SPN/CMA

[grinnurse, RN]

Adam, sounds as if you are definately in the right profession. Sorry that you had 2 losses back to back that day. Hugs to you.

[suebird3]

Adam....my condolences. To have 2 people go on ya in one day is a bit much.

We can't always "save" everyone, and you did give the patients and families comfort. Continue doing what you are doing.

Suebird