Hello all,
I have been reading through so many other threads trying to find comfort, and I figured it was finally time to join this forum myself. I am a not a babyrn as in I work with babies, but I am a new nurse working on a Med/surg floor nights 7p-7a. I have been on my own for about a month now and im feeing really down. I have read so many stories from other new grads that are struggling and I really do hope that what I am feeling is normal. Nursing for me has always been a struggle. I struggled in school though I studied very hard. I also had a hard time during my orientation and my preceptor was not very approachable and would always tell me that I wasn't quite "getting it". My manager told me that she felt I was just having trouble with my confidence. I cry before every shift and feel like im on information overload when i read through a pts chart at the beginning of shift. I get sick to my stomach when a doctor approaches me because i cant always remember everything about the patient they ask about. In the morning when i give report the other nurses always seem to find something that i forgot to do from the night before. I never forget anything that would cause harm to the patients but I feel awful just the same and worried that they picked up on something that never even occured to me to do. When i go home and sleep I have dreams that I am still at the hospital and my sleep cycle is really off. I cant enjoy my days off because i keep thinking about having to go back to work the following day. I really want to speed through this first year to see how things are going to end up for me. Thanks for letting me vent. Any stories of new grads feeling this way or any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.