Worried re: Application rejection (long, sorry)

I was just posting on another thread in this forum, & I just wanted to say how FREAKED OUT I am feeling right now.

I am really, really nervous about my app to grad school for the anesthesia program. I have it all filled out, the envelope is ready to go, my references are already on their way, but....I'm too nervous to send in the app. I sent my husband off the other day to mail my application, but then I called him on his cell phone before he got to the mailbox & begged him not to send it yet. I don't know why I'm so freaked out by this.

I knew as an undergrad that anesthesia is what I wanted to do, so I really tried hard to maintain good grades. I did end up graduating suma cum laude (3.91 overall, 4.0 in nursing/science courses), tops in my nursing class, lots of honors, awards, blah, blah, blah (who cares right, I know it's not as important to me as it used to be)....I've been working in a CTS ICU since graduation, & I got really good recommendations. But I am still really freaked out about getting rejected.

I just feel like if I send in this application, it's all over. I have no control over what happens from that point on. I know so many people who are aiming for anesthesia school, & the thought of being judged against everybody else is just scary. I know it's just one school, but I feel like a rejection from this school would just mean my dream is over. Do I make any sense at all?

How did you guys feel about your chances of getting accepted? Was anybody else as nervous as I am?

Lou
Convicted of placenta previa & serving time on couch arrest ~ Day 23