This patient really got to me :-(

[cindyloowho]

I have been working in pediatrics for a long time, but only got into nursing not too long ago. I started a new job in pediatrics on the oncology floor and while I am still on orientation, I already know that I will love it! However, I had this one patient the other day that really has tugged at my heart strings and I am finding myself tearing up randomly, being kept up at night some, and just overall perseverating about this sweet little child who didn't deserve to get the diagnosis he did.

He might be okay (not like a terminal brain cancer or anything) but it's an aggressive cancer and he will have to fight like mad this next year. He will be getting some of the most awful side effect inducing meds and will just be so sick for so long, it makes me so angry for him and his family!

I think that I am so upset about this little boy because I see a lot of my son in him, and everyone has always warned me that it is harder when you see your own children in your patients. Has anyone experienced this kind of emotion, and if so, what did you do to take care of yourself? I am assuming that it will fade in time but I am sure I will see him on the floor again in the next year, and while part of me wants to follow up with him to see him get better, another part of me is worried that if I keep seeing him and I witness bad times for him, it will eat away at my soul.