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Discussion

Taking work home

OB nurses that have cared for patients of fetal demise or infant death, how do you keep from taking it home with you? Has there ever been a situation where, no matter how hard you tried, you could not get it out of your head? I am having trouble sleeping and having horrible nightmares and cannot seem to get a recent situation off my mind. Any suggestions would be really appreciated.

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    • Featured Replies

    Does your hospital offer an employee assistance program where you can speak to a professional for free?

    Your feelings are totally normal, especially if this was your first death. It can be very traumatic, particularly those that are unexpected. It's a great idea to seek help now if you're having trouble coping, since you are unfortunately likely to have similar experiences in the future. Talking to a counselor might be a good way to let out your feelings in a safe environment and develop coping skills that will help you as you move forward.

    Best wishes, and I hope you feel better soon. :hug:

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    • Experts

    The first fetal demise I took care of - what feels like forever ago - every time I closed my eyes for a week I saw that baby. I had to write a very very long, mostly non-specific, to get it out of my head. It is hard to work through that sometimes. I second the PP's suggestion of EAP folks if you have them. Informal debriefing with your coworkers who are likely to understand where you're coming from is also a big help. I can say things to my coworkers that NO ONE else in the world will get.

    Some of my coworkers go work out, and go until they have more or less 'exorcised' the bad situation from their mind. I have one friend who ran twelve miles on the treadmill before she felt like she could go home and not think about it anymore. (Of course, do only what you can do safely. Yours might look like a long hike in the woods instead of running close to a half-marathon!)

    Wishing you all the best, and a peaceful recovery.

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    Agree with everything that has been said. You have to do something good for you...treat yourself to a massage, go for a long walk, take a kick ass exercise class. Debriefing is always a good thing. Keep this in mind....it is BECAUSE you are HUMAN that you react this way. Be more wary if you didn't....

    Give yourself time to process. You will see brighter things again!!

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