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strike 3 ouch

I failed nclex RN CA 3x, just recieved my letter again ,,,its awful,heartbreaking,disppointing,and unexplainable feeling..i have no idea how to bounce back or recover from this am confuse where to start...and how to begin again in chasing my dream to become a nurse.I studied, prayed, and tried my best to be optimistic, But after all that effort again it turn out to be a negative result failed once again. Am like a flat tire right now dont have a job,am stuck been like this for like a year since i graduated last april 2010. Am ashamed to my family and friends and hate my self right now am defeaated never felt this way before. 21st birthday coming up in couple of weeks and i thought am gonna be happy but it turn out the other way around worst bday gift failed again.Maybe GOD is trying to challenge me to hang on and keep fighting on this nclex beast. But it' s like fighting without knowing how to win. A have little hope within myself that someday , somehow, or somewhat i will find a way to Pass this exam. I'l do whatever it takes and start from scratch again in pursuit of goal to become a nurse .Goin to take a week off and then begin to prepare for this battle again hopefully this 4th try will be the last one because i dont want to feel this feeling ever again its a nightmare that is so hard to overcome.

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