TitaniumPlates

Because she/he is one of those that believes prostrating yourself before the altar of making money for investors (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT WE DO NOW) should be your passion. If not, you're just a horrible human being. Whatever. Don't take it seriously. I meet nurses like this (if they are actually a nurse and not a NM, HR person, or administrator of some sort who has a vested interest in keeping you believing that you have to live like a homeless person and love it or you couldn't POSSIBLY be a good nurse) every single day. That one that just makes nursing their whole identity and if you DARE to expect anything more....you should be flogged then fired. Meh. It's a job. And I would ABSOLUTELY leave it if travel weren't so lucrative. I care about my patients just as much. I JUST MAKE MORE MONEY DOING IT than this nasty poster does....and that's probably what their actual problem with your post IS. That you question the status quo and you are questioning conformity.

Why are you researching this topic? If you are a Nurse and you know anything about working as a Nurse, you already know why Nurses oftentimes do not seek help--hint: it has to do with their licensure and their employability. "work life balance" is the term your looking for. If, again, you ever worked as a Nurse, you would know why that is a myth that the employers continue to push. EAP programs.....um....you mean like....taking an exhausted, PTSD riddled soldier off the field for ONE HOUR a month to "talk to someone" so that......they can get sent back into the same crap that gave them the PTSD? Riiiiiiiiiight. How about CHANGE THE BATTLE. How about Nurse to Patient ratios that are decent and do-able (so that old "moral distress" thingie doesn't occur), how about pay that a single person as a Nurse can LIVE and actually pay for food? How about decent staffing? EAP is also a whitewashing by facilities that "show they care". Wanna know how they can show they care and prevent burnout? NURSE TO PATIENT RATIOS, FAIR PAY and FULL STAFFING. If you're a NM or HR person who is looking for a strategy other than....oh....full staffing, fair pay, nurse to patient ratios? Pizza parties STILL aren't the answer to burnout.

The troll NMs who get onto these sites to attempt to do to grads what they did to nursing students---brainwash them into believing that SACRIFICE is what is needed, whether you can feed your kids or not. Yeah...no. Do the whole dance for a year so you get that magic number....and peace out, honey. Do travel. Once those floodgates were opened, the hospitals are scrambling in ANY WAY THEY CAN to try and get the genie back in the bottle. Once we found out that...OH YEAH....it CAN be about a PAYCHECK and not your absolute identity as an indentured servant....they're panicking. I did staff for about 4 years and even changed facilities/states in order to make certain I understood that it WASN'T ME. It's not. It's them. They continue to spout this "$32/hr average salary nationally"....for the past 20 years. In ANY other profession....salaries rise with inflation. But not nursing. And we aren't supposed to care about that....we are just sacrifical, humble like the Lord and want/need nothing for ourselves....whatever. I left and never went back. I did travel for 2 years prior to Covid. I was taking home (with the same amount of work, same amount of time)---4x what the staff was making .One day of overtime? Cha ching. Covid hit? Now I make 5-6x what staffers make, take a MONTH OFF between jobs (and usually, it's the same hospital that waits for me to come back). I paid off ALL DEBT and purchased a new car for cash, paid for my ENTIRE PMHNP education in cash (I was not a Psych NP when I started travel. I am still in school. so my education is PAID FOR). This malarky that "travel jobs dry up" and the hospitals are crap---all that----that is propaganda by the facilities themselves. Trolling boards like this to discourage you from traveling and making the kind of money that we have been OWED FOR YEARS of wage suppression. NURSING IS A JOB, folks. NOT AN IDENTITY. Just like being an engineer and hating what you do, but you do it because it pays your bills. FFS. These troll HR people and NMs need to get over themselves and spend some time advocating for their own people to make a livable wage and have a decent work environment.

I lived in the deep South for 20 years. U*C, D**e, Wa*e, Vid*nt----ALL PAY the same for new grad nurses...it's called "collusion" and it's illegal....and oh....try and do something about that. They pay $21/hr. And if you leave and try to come back for the "outside the system" pay? They threaten you. California was one of the nastiest places I have ever worked or lived. The air quality ALONE should make people run screaming for places like GA or SC or NC. How about the fires? Maybe the drought? OH YEAH....also comes with a $500 water bill, no a/c unless you live in a $7000 per month 400 sq ft "closet"....and forget about breathing clean air. Ever.

Wrong. The person in the example is an experienced, second careerist and a highly educated Chemist. Which is precisely what some nurses find soOsoOOooooOOOO intimidating and threatening. I've seen this before many times. An older, more mature and life experienced nurse comes in---maybe she's a new grad--but she's certainly not stupid. She ran a household of 5 kids or a department of 27 sales people or a unit of soldiers. But nurses do this just like any other profession. Don't give me that crap about "she's just harried and rushed"---sorry---I don't act like an orificehole to people because I am "rushed". I don't say s#itty things or threaten people because I'm "harried". If you have to act this way---when your rushed or overworked? This profession is not for you and this says so much more about YOU than about the new grad. It's about time good nurses start walking and finding other places to be. Misery loves company---leave the nasties to each other--maybe they'll drive the unit into being shut down or the patients will complain enough because there isn't a one that can hold their tongue. I love how nurses seem to think they're some sort of special sauce that they get to act all crappy and get away with it because...stress. Like nobody else has a stressful job. Just them. Best advice is in the article. document and burn them. Don't sit back and be afraid and don't ever run if you can fight. I document, document, document. And when they least expect it---they're sitting in HR cooling their heels---and a few times? Losing their jobs. Yeah. I think they deserve it....because now I'll get the "but you cost a nurse her job!" No. The nasty nurse cost herself her job.

You're still a new grad. Leave the residency off of your resume and apply for the new grad residencies closer to you. "My former manager won't be a reference"===nursing at it's finest. He could speak to your punctuality, attitude and some other things---but he is choosing to do what all craptactular nurse managers who allow this garbage to go on in their units do---hobble anybody who dares to leave. I'd put them in my rearview and never speak of them again. Don't put them on your resume and don't utter a word to anyone about your experience with them. 2 months? I've left jobs of a YEAR off of my resume because of ***** nurse managers like the one you had the misfortune of getting. Apply as a new grad---if you're under a year---that is what you are. And don't let anyone tell you that acute care is off the table for you. That's just a scare tactic. Again---it's what nursing does best. Good luck.

I will do what every good hospital HR and Risk Management person will do who is trying to prevent a lawsuit. Tell you I am so sorry, listen to your complaint, thank you for bringing the problem to my attention, and then promise that somehow I will find an answer for you. That's what happens now--on this forum and pretty much everywhere else that nurses go in order to express their frustration, anger, exhaustion, unhappiness.....etc. So sorry. Chin up. It'll get better if you just keep plugging along. No. It won't, and it doesn't. I am sorry that you are experiencing this----and this is not unusual in any way, shape or form. This is nursing. First. Kooky Korky is absolutely, 100% correct---you ever have someone touch you without your permission---you make it your mission in life to have that person removed. NO ONE. No. One. has the right to touch you without your permission. As any Nursing 101 instructor will drill into your head---YOU also have no right to touch a patient without their permission. This goes both ways. See the thread that discusses the horrible incident of the OR Nurse that was fired for "workplace violence" for "redirecting" a colleague who was baiting her in a storage room by blocking her way. She was in the wrong. I hate it, but that is the truth. You never, ever let a colleague or anyone else in your life---touch you without your permission. Second. Changing specialties isn't as hard as some here are trying to make it sound---unless you are shifting from, say, ER to OR or some super specialty. If you have ER experience, and you do---with ridiculous ratios, which says to me that you have a keen sense for organization and time management to succeed even for a month in that environment---you pretty much can go to Med Surg or Tele or Outpatient without 16 weeks of intensive "relearning". That's hogwash that you can't switch without this horribly steep "learning curve" with acute/emergent care experience. I changed from ER to ICU---and the ICU RNs were all flabbergasted that it took me 6 weeks to literally toss a good number of them out of my patients' room because they wanted to "drive". Yeah, no. There are subtleties that occur in ICU that in the ER I would not have been able to take the time to note---but I sure as hell knew what to do for my patients. CRRT and those specialty procedures come in time---that isn't part of the initial "learning curve". Anyway. Third. Nobody. Nobody gets to tell you that you are stupid, worthless, incompetent or lazy. That is harassment clear and simple...and you should be documenting every single incident and turning that into HR. If HR doesn't do something about it---you lawyer up. You sue that hospital for harassment. You are not a punching bag. I am so godda#ned sick and tired of these "senior nurses" who think that they can haze new nurses. I've kicked a few in the bits (figuratively) and I stand my ground. Bullies are mentally unstable. There. I said it. I am sooooOOoooOOOOoooo sick of nurses who believe their s#it doesn't stink or that they have never made a mistake---bullying and crapping on new nurses, techs, other personnel---because they usually are the dumbest, most dangerous and the most mentally ill of the bunch. They drive normal, successful, intelligent and valuable employees away---because they are miserable, quasi-talented and below level intelligence---it's the only way they can feel good about themselves. And that goes for anybody here that fits that bullying description. Don't give the the Bill Clinton defense---well, it depends on what your definition of bullying IS. Baloney. It's like Mediaography. We know it when we see it. Knock it off. If you wouldn't want it said to your mom or your husband or your kids---don't say it to another colleague. Studying is not going to convince the "hazers" in the NICU or Mother Baby unit to stop acting like orificeholes. Because this is who they are. Remember Maya Angelou---"When someone shows you who they are---believe them." Nursing has degenerated into a core group that drive good people away---and good people who educate themselves the hell-o out of the bedside environment (this includes outpatient clinics). You're doing the right thing---educate yourself out of this. It's the only way---you are too good of a person to hang around and be abused. However---you should cast a curse on your way out of these toxic units if you can---document all of it, turn it all into HR, and if the situation warrants it---turn them into the BON for workplace violence if they grab you, turn them in for ethics violations---and see a lawyer. I'm all done with some nurses behaving as if they are immune to consequences. It's about time those of us who just want to come in and do our jobs---show those who decide that the job is for them to gossip, haze and bully---and that includes doctors---that this isn't going to fly and legal consequences will ensue. Many here will immediately respond with---but you do that, and you will never work as a nurse again. And.....this proves my point. If I hold you, acting like an orificehole and bullying and grabbing me and demeaning me, responsible for your behavior---you think I should be punished? This is exactly why nursing has degenerated into what it is---it's the Mob Mentality. You snitch, you squeal---about how we're abusing you? You get squashed. We take away your ability to feed your family. Nice, huh? OP----you document, document, document. If it's legal in your state to record as a "single party"---meaning you can record conversations without the other party knowing--and there is no HIPAA information? You do it. You nail these people and make it known that this is not okay. I would educate myself like you are doing----pull yourself up out of the muck. Like the lotus---you will bloom out of standing on muck and mud. Don't let any of these people drag you into their drama.

Fullglass, you're being either willfully deceptive or ...well.... Bakersfield is....not a good place to live if you like breathing clean air and drinking water uncontaminated by fracking fluid or other oil field pollutants. Myoglobin, you have asked this question many times here and I can go back and pull up all of those threads, where someone suggests something and you shoot everything down. My best advice to you is pull the thread up from 6 months ago, go over it again with a fine toothed comb, put your nickel down and make a decision. If memory serves, your companion has no intention of leaving her position and there is a situation wih her kids as well. You kept hammering away at flying in to California and all that...and trying to game the system so that you can stay in...Florida?....and be paid big money, have low taxes, an easy caseload, and only work a couple days a week. Nothing has changed from that epic thread until now. California is on fire in the central valley. i moved from there when i had to wear an n95 to walk into work or walk my dog. bakersfield has a ridiculous level of respiratory diseases because of he oil fields. which is why its "so affordable". places like modesto, stockton, most of Sacramento, and the areas off of the interstate that are not big cities...are carbon copies of modesto. It gets a little tired when the same question is posed by someone who has no intention of actually taking any of the advice, can't or won't, doesn't matter. Blue states tend to have higher costs of living and taxes. red states have low taxes in some areas and lower cost of living...but each have their set of problems. what is getting irritating for me is when people ask others what their opinions are and then shoot those opinions down ad infinitum. Decide what you and your partner are willing to do and sacrifice for this "high paying, low work" job...and do that.

Gossip is the most deadly microbe, it has neither legs, nor wings; It's composed entirely of tales, and most of them have stings. When you hear something you like about someone you don't. I don't believe for one second that gossip was or is in any way useful to "maintain social cohesion". It's a way to manipulate a situation--where you know more (also called "toting news") and therefore makes you seem important and "in the know", where you attempt to defeat a "threat" whether it's perceived or otherwise, or it's simply mean spirit. A friend has a parent who does this---to her and her siblings. She's a jealous and vindictive woman who sees everyone in her orbit, particularly her younger and more vibrant daughters, as threats. I've been in departments where I always seem to be "the last one to know"--because I go to work and do my job--I don't listen to, begin, or perpetuate gossip. I have been, however, the target of "news toters" who don't even stop to introduce themselves before they want to know your life history. Be sure never to ask theirs because that will cause a s#itstorm. As I mentioned in another thread--the one where the RN was terminated for "redirecting" a co-worker after that co-worker had made life miserable for her--there are many in our society that fit the bill of the "mean spirited" or "malcontent" or "sociopath" or just plain old jealous of all that is good because their inner life sucks. It's easy....very, very easy....to defuse these types. Ignore them. When they attempt to draw you in to anything besides work related business---walk away. We, female Nurses, are trained from an early age to strive always to "be nice and have people like us". It's important no to be labeled "bitc#y" or "aggressive". Nobody likes "angry woman". So we go along to get along. We need others to like us---so we don't buck the trend. If it's the popular thing to gossip about a certain someone---we participate. A nice thing about getting older? I don't give a rat's rump about what anybody thinks of me. Ever. Nobody else pays my bills, cleans my house, does my job, or is married to my husband. The minute you pay my mortgage, you get to tell me that I need to worry about your opinion of me. I feel sorry for the younger generation these days--social media has all but ruined life for pretty much everyone--with the anonymity that a mystery screen name provides so that venomous attacks can ensue without repercussion. Then it translates into real life encounters, where some of these youngsters can't separate how they behave in an anonymous forum and what is expected in a professional workplace. That said. Gossip is pointless and makes those who participate in it feel an importance that is not real. I laugh at them and know that no matter what---when I say something in my workplace or to my personal friends, they know what I say is the truth and not some speculation based on my mean spirited attempt to bring someone down who threatens my irrational belief that I am all powerful and all knowing. The best advice I can give younger or new nurses who encounter this? Behave in a way that you would never be embarrassed of if it came out in open court.

lol. PhOne. I was on one. I type quickly and was in between cases, so I didn't edit my grammar. Imma grammar police person as well. I was attempting --note attempting is now written how it was intended--was not translated with my phone into the posting. I'm usually at work when everyone is on here opining. It's a pain and I don't have time to edit as precisely as I'd like. guidance and leadership were meant to be how they are showing up right now. So yes. It's an "I blame my phone, lack of time, case pending, etc and ad infinitum time sucks" culprit.

It sucks. Bigly. I worked block 3's, 3 days off, block 4 (1 of which was an 8)---the "8" was never an 8, as I was still required to be either at shift start huddle (.5 hr plus .5 hr drive in and out) or shift end report (.5 hr plus .5 drive in and out). Consistently, they would "forgot" that the 8 was my "short shift" and didn't have enough people on the floor to cover. "Could you stay?? Pleeeeeeeeeease??" You're already there and you feel like a schmuck for saying "NO" to their face. Then it's still another half hour while they "shuffle people around" to cover you. Nope. Nopity nope nope. I was a zombie---far worse than when I had a 36 hour week and 4 off. Don't fall for it. If they want to do this---it has nothing to do with finances. It has to do with what I just described. They want your body in there when they ask you to stay over. OT is much cheaper than travelers and they can flex you if they have low census. This is a rotten thing to do--and I would find somewhere else to go. As a traveler, I could get jobs with Faststaff---for 48 hour weeks. The 36 + 8 is just that---I worked 36 hours one week and 44 hours the next---but it never, ever was just 44. It always ended up being 48 or more. Don't.

i agree jed. she does have an attitude of entitlement. not attack, because she is frustrated and frightened. she needs GUIDANCE and LEADERSHIP. not attacks and the "i am the attitude adjustment police". give her decent, relevant advice or like my momma taught me...keep it to yourself. its not helping the new nurses cope or integrate. she is scared. i was where she is. i got the craptacular preceptor who told me to "get in there!!" in my first trauma...no guidance, no help, only attack and criticism afterwards.and he was a 10 year veteran who was just SO LOVED and respected. help her. that is what she has reached out for. there is a way to redirect her without calling her names and being demeaning.

The point here I think is that if OP's preceptor is lazy and rogue for tiny, insignificant things, what is she doing for huge things? Whomever compared dumping a urine bag in the sink to doing what is effective in a code scenario....FALSE EQUIVALENCY. What are you doing prioritizing dumping urine in a sink when your patient is coding? No such thing. Don't compare the two. I have been a part of a unit where someone is just SO LOVED!!!!! OMG!!!! SHE IS THE GREATEST!!! And nothing could be further from the truth. Remember the old joke...opinions are just like buttholes....everybody has one. About the Adderall. So. I am a patient who witnesses this, but I have no context. What then? Is my nurse taking my drugs? Is she taking aspirin or adderall or xanax or oxycontin? yeah. i do expect someone to take their private rituals to a private area. no nurse needs ADDERALL so emergently that they cannot excuse themselves to go get a deink of water and privately pop their meds. I call bullshite. again...it says far far mire about this preceptor's lazy atritude that anything goes and nothing matters. it matters. OP, be discerning is what you need to take away from this preceptor and the advice you are getting on how to cope. I think you should stick it out for at least until you are off precepting. watch other nurses...get away and go observe others as often as you can. learn the charting inside and out get your assessments down to 15 minutes or less. step in feont of this preceptor when getting or giving report...interject as often as possible with questions. make her answer you and notice in her amphetamine fueled state that you are there to learn from her. and yes. Adderall is an amphetamine....just legalized.

exactly this. the nurses here acting like OP is some type of abberant because she has a problem with spreading disease...says far, far, FAR more about the nurses making the demeaning and condescending remarks than it does about OP. OP....not everyone was brought up properly to know it's disgusting and unsanitary to dump urine where you wash your hands or quickly get a patient a cup of water. My mother raised me in a house, and even some animals know you don't defecate where you might eat from. I don't live or work in a barn, and I would expect that as a patient that may be immunocompromised or post surgical, I would have a nurse that has the sense God gave a cat. It's pure laziness on the part of the nurse...and I for one would not take their queue on anything from that point on.

jed it was a devils advocate statement...the possible point of view of the preceptor. the piling on isn't helpful and it only starts to prove that nurses look for weakness and attack. like hyenas. OP has gotten really decent advice without the crappy clique engine revving up to decimate whatever confidence she might have had.