Personal Statement, IM STUCK!


Hey guys/girls,

I am applying to a masters program for Adult-gerontology acute care nurse practitioner and I have a difficult time expressing myself through writing, Im more of a conversationalist. I LOVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM! Please, tear it apart if you need to :)

and the prompt of the personal statement is as follows: "What are your professional and educational goals as they relate to the program to which you are applying?" 700 word maximum

P.S. this is a super rough draft! so keep in mind my grammar/punctuation wont be on point ;)


During my undergraduate clinical experiences, I frequently found myself feeling curious and digging deeper into my patients care plan. I had an intrinsic drive to learn more and to provide higher levels of care and communication to the patients and their families. After asking numerous questions regarding a diagnosis, labs results, underlying pathophysiology, and pharmacological choices, I distinctly remember my mentor briefly shutting me down. Don't worry about that, we just need to make sure they stay stable and get their medications”, she said with a smile. I forced a smile right back, but it was as if someone other than myself had shut off that light bulb that hovered over me everywhere I went. I take pride in my work as a nurse, but I cant help but feel that many things are missing. An even more profound knowledge base, autonomy, the ability to grow as a leader, independence to order diagnostic tests, and diagnosing patients are just some of my goals as a nursing professional. Working with a limited scope of practice and having the majority of my aspirations unfulfilled are the reasons to which I am seeking a master's degree in advanced practice nursing.

Though in rare occurrences, when critical patients arrive on my unit at the hospital, I find myself as one of the first individuals at the bedside. Diving into the situation, I secretly hope I am assigned the case. The required acute attention to detail, the necessity for rapid interventions and decision making and the importance of managing a complex health problem are what draws me to the critical patients. Keeping my professional goals in mind and possessing a strong curiosity towards caring for acute, critical and chronically ill patients has drawn me towards the Adult-Gerontology Acute Care Nurse Practitioner (AGACNP) program at the ********* (school)

In order to achieve my professional goals as a competent AGACNP, I require a firm foundation of clinical knowledge, leadership, and role development. The master's nursing program at the (****SCHOOL) offers a rigorous and comprehensive curriculum that challenges its students to grow and become leaders and the best, which I plan to achieve using my drive for excellence. (Should I put an example here?) I also expect? my clinical experiences to help shape me into a culturally competent and well-refined professional, and I believe that at (SCHOOL), the various clinical sites with diverse patient demographics and ranges of illnesses will fulfill my expectation . –In addition, I take pleasure in submerging myself in a rich learning environment with students and faculty who not only aim high but also achieve their most desired goals while advancing the future of nursing; attending (SCHOOL) would provide me with that opportunity.-- Given the chance to learn from a knowledgeable faculty, such as the one from (SCHOOL), I aim to distinguish myself as a reputable and highly regarded AGACNP. With the vast majority of nursing professors holding a PhD at (SCHOOL), I feel confident that I will have learned from the best and will be adequately prepared to sit for and pass my boards.

Since the beginning of my nursing career, I have been able to establish a reputation of accountability and distinction within my workplace. This has been demonstrated by the opportunity given to me to precept new employees, a responsibility frequently granted to senior nurses on my unit. As the youngest and most inexperienced nurse on my unit, I have been able to prove that I am a leader, eager to learn, enthusiastic towards helping others around me, and up for any responsibility placed in front of me, within my scope of practice. If given the opportunity to attend the (SCHOOL), I will not only continue to motivate myself, but will prosper in the challenging environment this program has to offer. Obtaining a higher education will deeply influence my life as a professional in the nursing field and I can say with confidence that I will make a substantial contribution to my patients, the community and to the profession as a whole.


Thank you so much in advance to those who help :)