Who has a funny delivery story??? - page 2
I was wondering if any of you would like to share funny delivery stories...For instance, I had a patient who was wonderfl and relaxed between contractions, but who would grab me by the shirt while... Read More
Mar 13, '02I was tempted to say "Out of the mouthes of babes but decided the pun was way too,( well, you know.... Martha
Mar 31, '02OK, this is probably the most embarrassing thing (and everyone thinks it was hysterical) that ever happened to me.
I was laboring a patient--no big deal. Bonding with the family all the way through. They were sponges and wanted all the info I was willing to give, so we talked all day about labor, physiology of labor, expectations at delivery, etc.
When she was ready to push I got directly in front of her. As she grabbed her knees, I supported both feet and as she began to bear down I realized that membranes weren't ruptured. It had been so long since I'd had a patient get to second stage without SROM or AROM that I didn't give it a thought. Well, I don't need to go to Niagra Falls to get the experience--been there, done that. However, I had to leave to change my top, bra, pants and panties. Thank God, it wasn't mec...........................................
Apr 1, '02Ahh, the membrane bath! I think most of us can say we have been through that one! Not too long ago, after a delivery, I was helping the patient to shower (we have a sit down shower), when she started to pass out and directed the hand device toward me...I took the shower with her! AND, I was down on the floor so she could land on somethng soft instead of the hard tile floor! Before that episode, with the same patient, I had to dodge (unsucessfully in both cases, I might add) her bursting bulging membranes AND vomitus...So, I guess it was a GOOD thing we bonded even further, with the shower...... Don't you think we should get hazardous duty pay sometimes??????Thanks for sharing your story....I think we refer to being bathed in membranes as a Baptism by fire."
Apr 2, '02This one will get me recognized online! I was the "tidy bowl nurse" after this delivery. I came on at 3pm and at 320pm a pt came up via wc. She had been sent home earlier that am when her labor stopped. She didn't look me in the eye. Her mom and another lady were with her and said she had to go to the BR first. I told her-don't have that baby in the toilet and went just outside to get a precip tray. 5 secs later I hear a scream and guess what? I fished a 5lb boy out of the "dark waters" if ya know what I mean. She was so "focused" we couldn't get her off the seat and really thought she might be high on something but she soon snapped to it! Needless to say, it was a LONG shift after that!
Apr 5, '02OK, funny doc story. We had a physician who told me he would have rather run a tire store (family pushed him to be a physician).
Anyway, he was kinda scary, but could be gently guided the right direction. He got very nervous--very easily. When a G8 P7 had a big honking decel (went from 2cm to a rim) he insisted we rush her back to the OR for primary C/S--fetal distress.
We got her on the table and I reassured the doc that heart tones were fine. With the next contraction the baby's head came 1/3 of the way out--contraction ended and the physician pushed the baby back in.
I don't know what came over me, but I slapped him and told him that was the wrong direction--everyone got to laughing and the baby just slid on back out...............glad he had a sense of humor, too.
Apr 5, '02I LOVED that one! Can just picture it too.....Anyone see the visual relationship between a tire and a cervix???Ok, NOW I am tired...Thanks for the story...Hope you people keep them coming!
Apr 5, '02AS far as docs go, several years ago we had a doc who was bipolar and nights just wasn't a good time frame for him..You never knew what he might do. During one delivery that was kind of hairy (not really "hairy", but you understand..), I wasn't moving fast enough for him...(the BIONIC woman wouldn't have been quick enough)...He became enraged and threw a stool at me ( not of the biological variety). It nearly hit me but surprisingly, I was calm...I then walked over to him and suggested he improve his aim and hit me next time because I had seen his house and had several ideas on how I would love to redecorate it....Never tossed anything else at me again...
Apr 8, '02OK, I want to know, how many of you other nurses have called an MD all frantic because you checked a pt and she was "footling breech", with a "foot" in the vagina and the MD gets there and calmly informs you that what you felt was stool in the rectum?
OR, how many of you have held a head of of a "presenting cord" only to find out (luckily before the c section was done) that what you were holding the head off of was a hand? (I try to make stupid mistakes like that once in a while so people won't catch on to the fact that I am indeed perfect.)
Apr 9, '02You were there that night????? One time, one of our seasoned over 30 years in ob people came in at my request to recheck one of my exams in which I was unsure of the presenting part....She, with a straight face, mind you, did the exam, told me she would meet me outside the room....She THEN proceeds to tell me that she felt a labia! Damn if it wasn't a breech AND female....Now, THATS good! And I STILL have not felt the spines we are supposed to feel with our exams..Have any of YOU????
Glad to hear I am not the ONLY one to have been through the sort of exams as at your cervix...Whew, as I say to my poor nervous patients upon their arrival, " I HATE it when they let you humans in here!"
Nov 10, '05i actually found the spines rather early in my sve education... lol. once you find the cervix, you come down along one side and you'll hit them. it's a bone sticking out. you'll know when you hit it cuz they'll yelp. it gives them a weird sensation.
Nov 10, '05When I was doing my OB rotation in nursing school, I was observing a vag delivery... beautiful baby boy who was swaddled and put on mama's chest... but apparently the lil' winkie wasn't swaddled... because as mama yawned, a nice stream of urine arced over directly into her mouth... all caught on video I might add. At first she thought we had one of those dental rinsers, unfortunately she realized post-swallow what had happened. She took it well though- she and the daddy and family all burst out laughing, poor OB nurse couldn't stop apologizing for not wrapping the penis right... the other nursing student and I were about to bust from trying not to laugh.
Nov 10, '05I've got one, To get the full effect of this story you would really have to know me but I think it will still be funny.
This was when I first started working PP and antipartum. I was a new grad and even though I had summoned up the courage to become the first male to work on this particular unit I would get really nervous about being a male in OB/GYN. In fact it's kind of amazing I was able to get past blushing and putting my foot in my mouth.
Anyway, I was orienting and a nurse was trying to teach me how to do an FFN. She explained as she put the speculum in, showed me the tube and told me to be careful about keeping it sterile. As any good student should I paid very close attention and asked a few questions.
She then turned on the exam lights and visualized the cervix. I was standing on the side of the bed and she told me to look, she was explaining something about the color but I missed it because just as I was able to visualize the cervix I realized I was falling.
I was falling and the bed was moving I had leaned over with my hands on the side of the mattress for support. The brake was'nt on and the bed rolled under my wieght. The next thing I knew I had a very very close view of the cervix. My face was square in the middle of her legs, My legs were stretched out off the edge of the bed and my hands were stuck under my torso. I flailed a bit trying to get up but the bed just rolled more and then I wasn’t able to move at all. The other nurse and patient had to help me up after putting the brake back on the bed.
Everyone but me was laughing all I could get out was "I, I, I, I'm so sorry", then the other nurse walked me over to the mirror. I had the perfect imprint of the speculum handle on my face.
I wanted to die, thank god the patient wasn’t upset, she just kept laughing.Last edit by Dayray on Nov 10, '05
Nov 10, '05Had a patient show up in ER one day, got out of the car and onto stretcher cause she was crowning, baby delivered beside the desk. The patient was very upset and embarassed,:imbar the ER doc told her not to be too upset, because 3 years before we had a patient deliver in her car in the driveway. When the new mom heard this, she really started sobbing and explained that that was her also. I think she may leave a little earlier for the hospital with her next baby.:smackingf