New Nursind DX not approved by "NADA"

[Kingbandit]

I work in an inner city ER. Our new goal is to get thes nursing diagnosis approved:

1) Accute lack of home AEB: homeless foot odor

2) Circling the drain AEB crap vital signs

3) losing tooth to tattoo ratio AEB more teeth than tattoos

If you have some you would like to add please do.

Also here are some treatments that need taught in nursing schools

1) homeless foot odor control: shaving cream the sh*t out of those puppies

2) Leather restraint application on acute psychotic: lay across chest

3) Caffeteria dash: time management with 2 new admits and caffeteria closing in 15 minutes

4) Vetran a*s kissing: how to make the vetrans who have been there since Nixon was in office not feel bad that you are making a $1.50 less than them:angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: :angel2: