Lesson learned

Published

I have lost respect for a provider that I have known for many years. I had always trusted this provider's judgment and care. I of course have heard some rumors saying less than stellar things, but who hasn't had a disgruntled patient or two? This provider has always provided excellent care for my family (when we were well at least). I have learned my lesson. My spouse is dealing with some significant, new onset, rare, and disabling eye/brain issues. This provider has failed us at every step of his treatment thus far, and their bedside manner has been appalling at best.

I have now become one of those disgruntled patients who have seen the light. Sadly I feel like I have failed my husband and delayed treatment because I trusted someone I shouldn't have. This has been a reminder to me that sometimes where this is smoke, there is fire

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Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.

Oh Emmylou, I am so sorry to hear of your husband's illness and your internal anguish. You said it yourself...you trusted this provider. The onus is on them, not you. My heart hurts for you.

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Saddened to hear of your spouse's illness. It's difficult to be a nurse when a loved one is ill.

The caregiver/ spouse roles become confusing.

YOU DID NOT FAIL... the provider did.

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Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
Saddened to hear of your spouse's illness. It's difficult to be a nurse when a loved one is ill.

The caregiver/ spouse roles become confusing.

YOU DID NOT FAIL... the provider did.

THIS.

Sending positive vibes for a competent provider to assist in your husbands health and for your husband to have a manageable outcome.

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xoemmylouox I'm sorry to hear this. Do NOT blame yourself. This is not your fault.

When you leave the practice make sure they know exactly why.

Best wishes.

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Specializes in Critical Care, Education.

So sorry you're faced with this.

In my own experience, I have grown to really value the opinions of the behind-the-scenes folks (case manager, quality director, etc) when it comes to physician performance & outcomes. They 'see' the stuff that no one else does.

Based on that, I "interviewed" docs prior to my surgery a while back (sailed through - excellent outcome) and went with the one that was not at all upset when I asked him for his performance data rather than choosing Dr GQ McCharm-guy or Dr Luxurious office with espresso machine.

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Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

I am so sorry for the health issues your husband is currently experiencing. My thoughts will remain with you and your family with hopes for the most optimal outcome.

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Specializes in ER.

It's so easy to blame ourselves in 20/20 hindsight. I'm sorry you're going through this, but it's NOT your fault! Don't carry that guilt!

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Thank to for all of the kind responses. It is very frustrating to see the failures and know how things should be going. I understand some blips, things happen, but we are past that. I just hope we can find a sense of peace with what faces us.

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Specializes in Critical Care.

Your spouse needs a specialist not a family provider. Unfortunately rare diagnoses are not the first thing Dr's think of. They do a differential diagnosis and start with the most common and likely cause and then a rare diagnosis is not caught right away. I remember looking at the differential diagnosis of left arm pain, from cardiac to esophageal, musculoskeletal to even cancer. Yes it can be a sign of lung cancer. How many providers think left arm pain is lung cancer?

I hope you now have a good specialist that can help your spouse get the right treatment.

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Specializes in HH, Peds, Rehab, Clinical.

I hope you are seeing good SPECIALISTS for your husbands needs. I work in ophthalmology, highly specialized in retina. My MD is so thourough that the other day I sent a man to ER b/c he couldn't pee, having prostate issues. He has Dx a bulging aortic anueryism, a couple of brain tumors, colon cancer---and I've been there 9 months. I worked up a woman a couple of months ago, she said she couldn't get her glaucoma drops in b/c her arm hurt too much to do it. A little investigation, a send on to internal medicine and she was admitted for cellulitis!

Just today, he Dx this: Acute Posterior Multifocal Placoid Pigment Epitheliopathy - EyeWiki He has seen two cases since residency. This was number two.

I am truly amazed at the things your eyes can tell you!

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