Just need to vent my worries

[its_meee]

I am about to start my junior year of my nursing program and I, like other students, have several worries. Although I am excited about entering junior year, I am also nervous about the work load that comes with it. Other students in my program talk about the dreaded junior year and how difficult it is. I am in a BSN program and up until this point we have only had clinical lab, but junior year is when we will start actual real patient care. There have been a couple times that we have went to LTC facilities, but only to do health histories and vitals. I'm excited, anxious, and scared all at the same time :)

I am also worried about the time that I spend on my school work and studying. I'm currently on summer break and have been enjoying time with my family and having "me" time. I know from my past semesters that once school starts back up, having any extra time is basically unheard of.

I am a non-traditional student. I just turned 40, I have 4 children between the ages of 4-16, and have been married for 17 years. I have some of the same concerns that other "older" students share. I'm worried that I will have difficulty finding employment after graduation; because of my age and because of the economy. I worry that when/if I find a job that patients and other nurses will automatically assume that I should know the things that an experienced nurse would know. I will be a brand-new graduate, but my age may give others the impression that I'm experienced.

I'm worried that after 5 years of schooling, and several thousand dollars of debt, that I will not be good at being a nurse. I want to be a good nurse; I have a 3.97 gpa so I am able to understand classroom content; I know that my entire life will be different, good and bad; I know I will have good days and bad days; I want to help others; and I want to make a difference. But despite all my studying and good intentions and my wants....what if I just suck? LOL I hope I am not the only student out there with these worries. I wish that I would have started college right after high school, I would have already been through all of this. But then again, I might have missed out on the joy of being a mother to 4 great kids and meeting my husband. I was a department store employee for 3 years, I was a waitress for one year, I did laundry in a LTC facility for one year, and a cake decorator for 10 years. I have made close friends and had life experiences that I never would have been able to experience if my life would have been different.

I'm sorry if this was too long...but I actually feel a little better being able to express my concerns. :)

[donk]

I could have written your post!! No real advice, just thought I'd respond with "you're not alone"!!!

[EclecticGal]

So just take a moment and breathe and say to yourself it will be O.K.. I am a recent grad, 44 years old, 4 kids and married for 17 years too. I have had all the same worries that you have had except for the what if I am to old. I am not sure why I never worried about that.

Take the program one day at a time. You will have days where you are on top of the world and doing great and then days where you fumble. Remember that you will most likely learn more from your mistakes that when you get everything right. Nursing school is a roller coaster and the learning curve is steep.

You will never know if you are going to be a good nurse until you get in there and just do it. To be honest now that I have started my first job I still wonder if I will ever be as good as my co-workers. It is my goal to just learn a little more everyday.

Good Luck