I'm not sure if this is what I want to do

[lisafaydaley]

I originally wanted to be a computer programmer, until I took a class where I couldn't understand not only the material, but also the professor, due to his strong accent. I got scared off. I really enjoyed an art course I was taking, so I thought pursuing a career in Graphic Design would be perfect, and it WAS...until 2002 when the economy got worse and worse and more people used web media than print media. Then, I was laid off with thousands of others. Over time, I lost my skills, couldn't find another job in that field, and couldn't keep up with expensive technology on my own.

I chose the direction of nursing for many reasons. The biggest reason was that throughout my life, I always seemed to be the one person around when someone would have a seizure, fall, or be injured. I always immediately go into "emergency mode" and help the person. I could go into details of all the random times things like that have occurred, but I think you get the idea. I also held my grandfathers hand as he died from cancer. When the hospice nurse arrived I told her that first his kidneys failed, then his organs began shutting down, and then he had a heart attack (I said all of this as if I knew what I was talking about, which really I didn't). The hospice nurse asked me if I was a nurse, because she was so impressed with the fact that I described exactly what had happened. She was insistent that I go into nursing.

So, I feel that this is supposed to be my calling. However, I am fearful. I don't have the same passion for nursing that I had for Graphic Design. I'm also not one of those super-organized OCD type of people who master each and every responsibility with ease. I am sometimes ditzy and forgetful. I mean well, but sometimes make mistakes. I don't have a lot of self-confidence. I am, however, quite intelligent and good with people.

I am just starting my second CNA job. My first CNA job was a nightmare. I'm not kidding. I feel like I have PTSD from it. I worked in an understaffed Alzheimer's and Dementia care unit, with coworkers who were out to get each other, and a boss who was a nasty bully. On top of all of that, I found out I was pregnant while I worked there (surprise to me!). Once I let my boss know I was pregnant, they set out to find ways to get me to leave. I fought it until they fired me. I was wrongly fired and tried to take legal action. It was a miserable experience.

How do I know that nursing is right for me? If I'm unsure, does that mean it is not the path I should take? Advice, anyone?

[kdmf12]

That is one hell of a roller coaster from computer programming to healthcare. The fact that you do recognize the details behind vitals is, in my opinion, a good sign of a nurse. I just have one question:

Have you taken biology or any human health care related classes before?

If not, try taking one. Knowing how the human body as a big picture works will spark more interest in the field. Dont try to jump into it too quickly, go for it one at a time.

PS. Having OCD like traits or whatever you assume nurses have is merely a skill! Meaning it can be learned. Dont stress yourself over that. Do it your way and make your way up :)

[lisafaydaley]

Yes I have taken Biology before and I took a little bit of Anatomy when I was a certified massage therapist.

I also have my CNA Certification. Going back to school, with more maturity, I've managed a 4.0 GPA because I love learning now (when I was in college after high school, I was more into the social aspects than academics.)

I just have trouble deciding what I want to be when I grow up, even though I'm now nearly 40. Lol. I guess I'm just nervous about making another career choice that might not work out.

The OCD comment is based on a close friend who is an AMAZING Nurse Practitioner. She is also one of the most organized, responsible, extremely detail oriented, and yes very OCD people I know. Her intensity is intimidating. I'm just not like that, which makes me worry about my survival in this field. I'm not a slacker, I'm just more laid back.

[kdmf12]

Yes She is also one of the most organized responsible, extremely detail oriented, and yes very OCD people I know. Her intensity is intimidating. I'm just not like that, which makes me worry about my survival in this field. I'm not a slacker, I'm just more laid back.[/quote']

Yes, I do understand that you are intimidated by the fact that nursing is both detailed and rigorous at the same time. Since you have some experience with CNA, it is indeed dependent on your judgement if you can keep up with the pressure.

Being close to 40 isnt bad to start a nursing career. I've known people that started from scratch in their mid 40's. As long as you make progress, it will be worth it.

[pmabraham, BSN, RN]

Good day, lisafaydaley:

It reads like you've a lot of good experiences to go with the bad ones as part of your roller coaster ride. If you take out the boss, co-works, and any under staffing to just look at your patient experiences, how were they?

If you look back, did you enjoy your biology and anatomy classes (congrats on the 4.0, but did you have fun with the sciences)?

If it helps to know about career switch, older journeys... at 7 I wanted to work with computers (which drove my one aunt crazy because young boys at 7, according to her, should not know what they want to do or at least should want to be a fireman or policeman). That continued as I got older driving her nuts every time we talked because she thought I would grow out of it. Yet, I went to school for software engineering. My journey in the IT world was its own twists and turns from computer operations to development of some interesting software to the last 12 years where I spent time developing Internet-based security methodologies and systems for Internet-based businesses.

That changed the end of 2011 after almost 30 years in I.T. The last job I had (for almost 18 of those almost 30 years) was (from a point of view) a dream job of working from home most of those years (especially the last 10). That job ended 2011 when I was 49. I had to make a choice as to what to do for a career. Move out of state to follow jobs like I niched into, stay in state and (since the geographic area I'm in is extremely Microsoft Windows-based) go back to school to learn Windows (I was working with variations of the Unix operating system), or completely switch carereers.

I picked nursing because looking back over the years, I've enjoyed helping people (granted a lot of it was over the phone or via email). That when I was involved in family health situations, people did look to me (even though at the time I knew nothing -- and never had an experience like you knowing the overall or the details) to be the main source of help. I guess one of my "things" (that can be both good and bad) is that normally nothing changes my composure in a crisis (i.e. I wait until its over to be a nervous wreck, cry, or whatever -- during the event, solid faced, focused). Add in that nursing can be a portable career to a degree and (this may read very weird in today's age) can be done without computers completed my thought process.

I started going back to college at age 50 to work on my prerequisites for a RN program. With Jesus' blessing, I will finish my last prerequisites this semester; I've already been accepted into a great RN program to start this August. Through my current journey, I've developed a passion for human sciences. And when I read great posts in this forum, I'm encouraged with the possibility I could very well be a nurse.

I'm sharing this journey with you so that you know age is not a barrier, and that going from a computer field to nursing is not a barrier. I've classmates that are unorganized doing well, and classmates who are organized and doing well -- it is what you make of it, and how you apply yourself with a KEY ingredient of ATTITUDE.

May you find peace in whatever you decide.

Thank you!