I need a reality check


im 100% newbie. like not even enrolled in school just looking into my options.

my dream: to one day become a certified nurse-midwife

my plan: i live very close to ny city tech, an in-state school whose tution is only $5500 which i should be able to cover with pell grant. i will be going for my associate's

my problem: im a mom and i cant afford to not work, at least part time.

my solution: take all the pre-req classes full time while working partime, then when the intense nursing classes begin possibly switch to part time and work part time. (hopefully at a birthing center)

am i being realistic at all???? am i ever going to see my husband and daughter???

edited to add: i am familiar with waking up at insane hours and being on my feet all day. i used to be a retail store visual manager working completely odd hours including overnight shifts and shifts that required me to be up a 4 or 5 in the morning. did that for 4 years so not a major change there

Double-Helix, BSN, RN

1 Article; 3,377 Posts

Specializes in PICU, Sedation/Radiology, PACU. Has 12 years experience.

You're not the first working mother to pursue nursing school, and you won't be the last. Of course it's doable if you prioritize and have a flexible work schedule.

What may not be realistic is going to school part time during nursing school. Most nursing programs are structured in such a way that you have to take classes in a very specific order. You may not have the option to go to school part time, or it will take you one or two more years to complete the program.

How old are you? I'm asking because, in order to become a CNM, you will first need a BSN. Then you'll need to work in a related field (preferably L&D). Then you'll have to get your Master's Degree as a CNM. If you're willing to wait to meet your long term goal, that's fine. But if you want to finish sooner, it might be helpful to go directly for your BSN, or enter an accelerated BSN program if you have a previous bachelor's degree.

Yes, you'll see your husband and daughter, although you will have significantly less time with then than before you entered school. But it's temporary, and the end result is worth it.

Ill be 25 this November. I know its going to take a while. Ill probably get my associates, work for a year or 2 and then maybe try the accelerated program depending on where we are financially. I may also try to become a doula in the midst of all of this

Double-Helix, BSN, RN

1 Article; 3,377 Posts

Specializes in PICU, Sedation/Radiology, PACU. Has 12 years experience.

So do you have a bachelors in another field? If you do, you can apply for a bridge program. It will be more expensive in the short term, but save you or at least equal out in the long term, and it's only one year of school rather than three. Just a thought.

Also, becoming a doula while you are in nursing school is probably not a great choice. When you're a doula, you are essentially on call when your client goes in to labor. You have to be there if it's noon time, midnight, a short labor, or 24 hours of labor. What if you had a clinical at the same time your client goes into labor? Unless you just did pre and post partum visits. Then you could make your own schedule and visit moms in your free time.

I actually have the same goal - and I'm the same age as you with 2 kids. I'm just finishing the 1st half of my 3rd year, and while it's been really really stressful, and it sucks not being able to spend time with my husband and kids, we all band together because we know it will be worth it.

How old is your daughter? Mine is 6, and we have discussions about why it's important that I need to study so much; I'm not sure if she completely understands it or not, but she appreciates that when I'm done it will mean more time, a better life, and the more extracurricular activities she'll be able to do. My son (4) has a harder time understanding, and it breaks my heart at how much he has to stay at home and play by himself - but again, this isn't forever.

It's all in how you think about it. This has to be a family decision. It's going to take a lot of work and determination from everyone. But if this is what you want, you need to dive in and give it your all.

Working also isn't easy, but I know a lot of other moms from school who do. I usually work, too, but I didn't this last term because I want to keep my GPA as high as possible for the masters program.

All in all, it's definitely doable, you just need to figure out what you want. Keep your eye on your goal - things have this weird way of falling into place when you do that....and if they don't, make them :)