I need advice,cuz i really do not know what to do

[plus22]

I just started my job at a nursing home about 3 months ago. I have only been on the floor as a STNA for 2 weeks. I have not even took my test yet! I have 3 kids, and i like the pay there it is good and thats hard to find ad I love the residents and they love me.. I really am starting to see why nursing homes cannot keep STNA's..

I am having alot of issues with my co-workers.. I have no idea what to do about it, i am already having a hard time with my life cuz i am a single mother. I do all i can for the residents because i am kind hearted and i want to do things the right way, alot of my co-workers do not and they expect me to rush and and get everything done as fast as them and i just started on the floor. It really stresses me out.. I only weigh 100 pounds they expect me to transfer all by myself?? I just do not get it everything i learned in my classes is not what is done. I suppose to be getting experience on the floor to pass my test, not feeling like i can do everything the right way and get done as quick as they want me too. They leave me with all the ones that are hard to do!! They leave me with all the ones that have BM's frequently, ones that got catheter care, ones that are heavy (way to heavy for me to move around by myself) but i manage. My boss told me to ask for help because she knows it to hard for me, but asking them for help is like a crime.. they do not want to help me.

Tonight really upset me and has me thinking if this is what i really want. My co- workers have been letting me do a resident all by myself the past few nights they said she was a one person transfer. Well i transfered her tonight, and her leg gave out on me and she did not technically fall she was falling so i let her down slowly.. She is ok, but ya know that was my responsiblitly that i took! The nurse told me she is a two person transfer. Then on top of that they ask me to transfer her by myself again right before i was leaving and they got all mad when i would not do it by myself. I do not know how all my residents are all taken care of yet, i almost do, but not quite yet if one of my co-workers tell me something i am going to listen to them because they have been there longer. It's really emotionally exhausting, i get bit, punched, scratched, pinched and called names.. and i know almost all STNA's deal with that.. i understand that it is not the residents fault, they have no clue what is going on so i deal with it and keep moving.. I really have no clue what to do.. It's not the residents that are making me rethink this it is the co-workers i got to deal with on a daily basis.. I am a very social person, i usually get along with anyone. I am breaking apart here! it effects my mood i am in when i am with the residents, i put a smile on for them but they know something is wrong. It makes me feel horrible about myself, it makes me feel unmotivated to want to go to work. It makes me depressed at home, they got all these rules for treating residents good, but what about treating eachother good i think it effects me alot more when people in there right state of mind treat me like crap, than people who are not in there right state of mind treating me like crap.