Hello- newbie

[xtxrn, ASN, RN]

Hello. I've been an RN since 1985. I've been disabled since 2004, though worked for many years with many of the diagnoses that landed me disabled. I have dysautonomia, nocturnal temporal lobe epilepsy, non-specific hypercoagulopathy (with a history of PEs in all three lobes of my right lung), fibromyalgia, degenerative disc disease, spine bone spurs, osteoarthritis, chronic headaches, progressing diabetes, and most recently (during the last 1 1/2 years), on chemo for acute myelocytic leukemia.

For the most part I do ok with limited activity- and the ability to mobilize slowly (balance issues). Shopping and housekeeping are very painful and tiring- and have to be paced. (I live alone and do not have any friends in this city). I'm fortunate in a lot of ways, but there are days when I get bummed, and really miss working.

I keep my license current, so I don't have to say I WAS a nurse.... I AM a nurse. I worked in many areas (staff to charge to department head), from pediatrics, nursing home administrative nursing, chemical dependency, adolescent psych, head injury rehab, neuro, general med-surg, and nursing home staff nursing. Before I graduated, i worked as a CNA.

I've had some horrific experiences in the ER as a patient. The most intense judgement came from nurses. Often it was cruel. There were a few very kind nurses in the ER at one particular hospital that made visits there less terrifying. At another hospital (where I generally go now with the cancer, and where the PEs were diagnosed after the other place blew me off), I've always had great nurses. I was admitted there for six weeks when the leukemia was diagnosed, and the oncology nurses were great. I had come back to this city a couple of years prior to being put on disability, and was horrified. Nobody knows when it will happen to them. In Texas, I worked at a couple of places that didn't throw away what I COULD do because of the times I was sick....but then it got much worse. After coming back here, it got bad.

I miss taking care of patients. I miss feeling useful. I remember so many memorable experiences, and am thankful for that. I'm glad for my nursing background as I deal with my own issues. And i am saddened by some of the things I've seen in recent years.

I hope to be a useful part of this community.