Good vs Evil

Farkinott, RN · Feb 8, 2005

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and

the Earth and populated the Earth with

broccoli,cauliflower and spinach, green and

yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and

Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts,Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice

Cream and Donuts. And Satan said, "You

want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and

Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some

sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan

smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt

that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so

fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the

wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And

Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan

presented Thousand-Island Dressing,

buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And

Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the

repast.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy

vegetables and olive oil in which to

cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish

and chicken-friedsteak so big it needed its own

platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went

through the roof.

God then created a light, fluffy

white cake, named it"Angel Food Cake," and said, "It is

good." Satan thencreated chocolate cake and named it

"Devil's Food."

God then brought forth running shoes so that His

children might lose those extra pounds.

And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so

Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And

Man and Woman laughed and cried before the

flickering blue light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato,

naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition And

Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the

starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man

gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man

might consumefewer calories and still satisfy his

appetite. AndSatan created McDonald's and its

99-cent doublecheeseburger. Then said, "You want

fries with that?"And Man replied, "Yes! And super

size them!" And Satan said, "It is good."

And Man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed, and created quadruple

bypass surgery.