Feeling Overwhelmed-Help!

[NurseNellie1]

Okay guys, I need some help. I've been a nurse for a short 3.5 years. During that time, I've worked primarily at a community hospital, where I still work per-diem. Last year, feeling overwhelmed at the hospital, I took a job as a school nurse. Unfortunately the school RN position was located in the city, getting there was a large inconvenience, and I felt myself missing the hospital. I was lucky enough to be able to go back to the unit hospital full time. I worked for another year there. Back in October, I was offered a position in the Emergency Department. It is a part time position but it is closer to home and pays more. I've been trying for a long time to get into this hospital (as I said- it's closer to home, pays more, and is union). I never really pictured myself in the ED, nor did I want to take a part-time position, but I took the position because I felt it was the only way to get my foot in the door there. As stated earlier, I am technically still per diem at my other hospital, (although I haven't worked a shift there yet because of my orientation at the new hospital-I trained full time but my part time is three 12 hours shifts for three weeks and then I have two 12 hour shifts for the fourth week). Anyway, I've been off orientation for a little over a month, and I'm struggling. I don't really like working in the emergency department at all. If I thought my old unit was stressful, it is nothing compared to this! On days we are short staffed, I've had up to 10 patients at once in the main ER (abdominal pain, chest pain patients, etc). Even in the critical care/trauma area I've seen them go up to 6 or 7 each. I haven't had to work in the crit/trauma area, or the pediatric area yet (I definitely don't even feel competent enough yet to do so), but I have major anxiety just thinking about it. In fact, I've been feeling really anxious going to work in general. I've always been an anxious person- I have dreaded going to the other hospital many times- but this is worse than ever. I'm beginning to wonder if I have made a mistake. At the time I switched to per diem status at my old hospital I was very comfortable there- I wasn't actively looking for a new job, this position kind of came up and as I said I took it because I thought it would be the better opportunity for me. I can't switch positions within the hospital until I've been there a year, and even then it will be difficult to do with it being union and many others moving positions as well. I don't want to be the person that continuously job hops or keeps going back to the same place (I've maintained employment at the one hospital the entire time), but I am just starting to feel kind of down about my entire career. I don't at all look forward to work, and I feel incredibly overwhelmed. Any advice?