Pre-Nursing Worries - Anyone Else Experiencing This?

[usfgirl]

Okay, so I am going to try to sum this up in the most efficient way possible...

I am on my last semester of pre-reqs and am also in the process of filling out apps to FL schools (BSN programs) for fall 2013. I initially got into nursing because I thought I wanted to be involved in medicine, but was not interested in being a doctor. I am an extremely nurturing person and enjoy taking care of others. I liked the idea that nursing felt more tangible to me - fewer prerequisites than MD, and only 2 years of school after pre-reqs. Also, I really felt that nursing would be more suited to my personal goals in life that are non-career related (like having a family, etc.).

So here is my problem: Half of the time, I am so into being a nurse. The other half, I am desperately looking for another major.

When I am volunteering (at a local hospital), I see what the nurses actually do, and I am so confident. For a volunteer, I get A LOT of patient interaction, and help the nurses with anything they ask. I'm not crazy about all of the aspects of bedside nursing (cranky families, customer service, etc.) but I believe I could do it with a smile on my face because, in my experience, there are a few patients whose wonderful attitude and appreciation make up for a lot of the negativity (I have met some WONDERFUL patients who I know I will never forget!). I should point out, though, that this is just my observation and initial thought based on what I have seen.

Here's where my confidence gets ruined:

- I cannot stand my pre-requisites. I have had A+P I and II online, and am currently taking Micro and Sociology online. Doing my A+P work online excited me just as much as getting a root canal would. I managed to get As in both (for the lecture and lab portions), but man was it a pain! I feel exactly the same way about Micro, and luckily Sociology is easy and painless. My main worry here is that I feel like I should enjoy A+P and Micro - isn't science the foundation of nursing? Could I feel this way because of the online experience, rather than having had a live class?

- I live in FL, and I hear about the horrible job possibilities and low wages (especially on AN). I would hope that, after graduation, I could seek help through family/friends/past volunteer supervisors to help me find a job since I have heard that knowing people can greatly improve your chances. But, isn't it sad that it comes down to knowing people? I just don't want to go through nursing school and come out of it jobless.

-I don't know if Nursing is for me anymore, but sometimes I think that I have just psyched myself out. I find hope in the fact that, when I browse other majors and careers, I always come back to Nursing. But, I know that Nursing school will take a lot of dedication and study hours. At this point, I am so confused and I am afraid that my heart's not in it. After all, when I am up to my neck in hw, I often cannot even remember why I truly wanted to be a nurse in the first place. That complicates things application-wise (essays often include a question like that).

The bottom line is, I am having these feelings and I feel like I am alone. I can't tell if this indecisiveness (which is so not like me) is simply from the stress, long pre-requisite process, and reading too many AN articles (just the truth lol), or if I have a serious problem on my hands.

Even on my worst days, I tell myself to see where I get accepted and to give it a try. If I honestly hate nursing school, at least I can say I followed through and gave it an honest try. I would rather know and have hindsight then to pass up the chance and think "what if?" So I'm thinking that's my path for now.

Any comments/advice would be great, especially if you have gone through this, or know any nurses who did.

[usfgirl]

If you enjoy your volunteer work, like what you see nurses doing, and imagine yourself liking it too, then that is very good in terms of how much you will enjoy actually being a nurse, which I think, is the most important question. Taking pre-reqs on-line is brutal. And if you don't enjoy the pre-reqs, you'll likely hate nursing school. However, find one person who loved nursing school, and I'll alert the press! It's fast paced, overwhelming, and half the instructors have a personal agenda. Some of them will deliberately make your life difficult, guaranteed. That said, it comes to a close eventually, and you're done. I agree with you, I don't like the job prospects. Low pay doesn't sound good either. If I had known the economy would tank early on, I've asked myself that question. Would I have still pursued it? And as with you, I can't think of anything better to do given my interests and temperament. At least in nursing school, you'll find everyone is in the same boat as you, with the same pressures, the same worries. You'll develop a support group of peers at school that you don't have now, on-line. It's no wonder you feel so alone.

Thank you so much for your response! Let me ask you a silly question then: Is it okay to hate nursing school? Or is the fact that I hate my pre-reqs a deal breaker for me, in your opinion?

Also, a more pressing question - if you don't mind answering. Knowing what you know now about job prospects, lower wages, and with your current nursing experience, would you have still pursued it?

While I do have these questions, so much of what you said has brought me some peace. I am so happy to know that, if I go into nursing, I will be with people in the same situation...it's hard to remember that sometimes. I do feel so alone. Your encouragement means so much to me!

[priorities2]

I waver sometimes, because science has never been a strong suite for me. But my end goal isn't nursing, it's nurse-midwifery. Which sometimes helps push through, and other times I get agitated wondering why I need to clog my brain with so much stuff. I could just become a direct-entry midwife, instead of going through all of this schooling, but I feel I could make a greater impact on my community by going for my masters instead.

Sorry for rambling. But I hear you on dreadful trudge through pre-reqs. Have you taken any career tests? Most schools offer a full career/personality matching test. They can be pretty helpful.

I so agree with these sentiments. My ultimate goal is to be a mental health nurse practitioner and so much of the science feels slightly irrelevant, like it would be better to be learning just counseling skills, pharm and neurophysiology. Oh, well!

[Isthisforreal?]

It is perfectly fine to hate nursing school. It's hard not to hate it. The pre-reqs were grueling, although I did enjoy the pre-req subjects. But, I'm not sure how much I would have enjoyed taking them on-line. Part of what made A&P enjoyable and interesting was the enthusiasm of the instructor. I think you need to pinpoint why you hate your pre-reqs. If you don't have any interest in the subject, then that might be a problem. But having all that information come at you in a two-dimensional way, flat, without added instruction, could really make it seem like a tedious burden, which is never any fun. I would have pursued it just the same knowing what I do now. However, I would have entered into it with a different attitude. That is, just roll with the punches. It sucks, there's a tremendous amount of BS, but, I know I make a difference in people's lives just by helping with a smile and being kind to them, and by having needed skills. You said you're a compassionate person who enjoys the appreciation of patients and accepts negative family members as part of the condition of working around people who are stressed and irritable. That is key, because if you can't handle the work environment, loving pre-reqs and nursing school won't do you any good. You got "A"'s in both A&P. Good for you! You may have hated it, but you mastered it. That's all nursing school is about. It's not enjoyable, for the most part, but there will be good moments, mostly when you perform direct patient care during clinical rotations. And trust me, everyone will have the same complaints, the same worries, the same exhaustion. The economy is poor right now, but things will pick up eventually. As an 85 year old man once said when asked about his secrete to success, he replied, "Being in the right place, at the right time, with the right stuff". You're in the right place, it's not a great time, but that will likely improve. Getting your RN license is the stuff. What helped me through was continuous encouragement - people telling me to hang in there, that I'll be a great nurse, that I'm smart, resourceful, with an incredible will. I think I would have made it without that, but it sure felt good to my soul to hear it from others. You need that support. It is essential that you have encouragement and emotional support through it. It's very tough.

[usfgirl]

It is perfectly fine to hate nursing school. It's hard not to hate it. The pre-reqs were grueling, although I did enjoy the pre-req subjects. But, I'm not sure how much I would have enjoyed taking them on-line. Part of what made A&P enjoyable and interesting was the enthusiasm of the instructor. I think you need to pinpoint why you hate your pre-reqs. If you don't have any interest in the subject, then that might be a problem. But having all that information come at you in a two-dimensional way, flat, without added instruction, could really make it seem like a tedious burden, which is never any fun. I would have pursued it just the same knowing what I do now. However, I would have entered into it with a different attitude. That is, just roll with the punches. It sucks, there's a tremendous amount of BS, but, I know I make a difference in people's lives just by helping with a smile and being kind to them, and by having needed skills. You said you're a compassionate person who enjoys the appreciation of patients and accepts negative family members as part of the condition of working around people who are stressed and irritable. That is key, because if you can't handle the work environment, loving pre-reqs and nursing school won't do you any good. You got "A"'s in both A&P. Good for you! You may have hated it, but you mastered it. That's all nursing school is about. It's not enjoyable, for the most part, but there will be good moments, mostly when you perform direct patient care during clinical rotations. And trust me, everyone will have the same complaints, the same worries, the same exhaustion. The economy is poor right now, but things will pick up eventually. As an 85 year old man once said when asked about his secrete to success, he replied, "Being in the right place, at the right time, with the right stuff". You're in the right place, it's not a great time, but that will likely improve. Getting your RN license is the stuff. What helped me through was continuous encouragement - people telling me to hang in there, that I'll be a great nurse, that I'm smart, resourceful, with an incredible will. I think I would have made it without that, but it sure felt good to my soul to hear it from others. You need that support. It is essential that you have encouragement and emotional support through it. It's very tough.

I think you are right about the online course...I used to enjoy school so much, especially because of the interaction with my teachers. I have had many professors whose quirks and personalities fit the subject they were teaching so well, and in turn, I learned more. I just don't get to have that in my online classes. And usually, when I finally get down to doing my readings and homework, I am pretty interested in much of what I am doing, so that's a good thing.

I can agree with you wholeheartedly as I am quickly finding out how much support really does help you. I don't have an overwhelming amount of support right now, but I am still lucky to have a few people in my life who are always pouring encouragement into me and telling me I'm going to make a great nurse. I even had a patient's family member tell me that! Made my life!!! I will never, ever forget that person. So far, "roll with the punches" is my attitude. I'm not completely sure what I am getting myself into, but I am preparing in the best ways I can. Right now, I am waiting on a few admissions decisions for next fall, and I'm not quitting. I have to know how this turns out.

Just so you know, conversations like these help me remember - in the midst of my anxiety and piles of homework - why I wanted to be a nurse in the first place.

And that 85 year old man is awesome - he is so right.