Nurses Humor
Published Feb 27, 2002
A HBD (has been drinking) patient is admitted after finishing a 26er in 15 mins flat. Here is a look into what he thinks when we converse near him.......
1] Anti-body - Against everyone
2] Artery - The study of fine paintings
3] Bacteria - The back door of a cafeteria
4] Barium - What you do after CPR fails
5] Benign - What you are after you be eight and before you be ten
6] Bowel - A letter like A,E,I,O,U, and sometimes Y
7] Cesaerean section - A district in Rome
8] Cardiac arrest - Taken into custody after stealing a coupe deville
9] Cardiology - Advance study of poker playing
10] CAT Scan - Searching for the kitty
11] Cauterize - To make eye contact with a woman
12] Charlie Horse - A 10 to 1 long shot in the Kentucky Derby
13] Colic - A sheep dog
14] Coma - A punctuation mark
15] Congenital - Friendly
16] D&C - Where Washington is
17] Dilate - To live long
18] Enema - Not a friend
19] Fester - Uncle
20] Fibula - A small white lie
21] Genes - What you wear cutting grass
22] Genital - Not a Jew
23] G.I. Series - A baseball game between teams of soldiers
24] Hangnail - A coat hook
25] Hemorrhoid - A male alien from outerspace
27] Hormones - What a prostitute does when she doesn't get paid
28] Impotent - Distinguished, well known
29] Labor pain - Getting hurt at work
30] Medical staff - A doctor's cane
31] Minor operation - Coal digging
32] Morbid - A higher offer
33] Nitrates - Cheaper than the day rates
34] Node - Was aware of
35] Organic - An organ work repairman
36] Outpatient - A patient who has fainted
37] Pap smear - A fatherhood test
38] Paralyze - Two far fetched stories
39] Pelvis - A cousinof Elvis
40] Pharmacist - A person who makes living in agriculture
41] Post-operative - A letter carrier
42] Protein - In favor of young people
43] Recovery room - Where they do upholstery
44] Rectum - Dang near killed 'em
45] Scalpel - What you stand on to clean windows in high rise buildings
46] Secretion - Hiding something
47] Seizure - A Roman emperor
48] Tablet - A small table
49] Terminal illness - Getting sick at the airport
52] Tumor - An extra pair
53] Urine - The opposite of "you are out"
54] Vericose - Nearby
55] Vein - Conceited
Any More?????
Zhakrin