My nurse trainor at my building came up to me at 9:00AM to tell me I had made "a couple errors" on Friday. She said she could not recall exactly what they were, but I was no longer allowed to pass medications (I should go back to observing) and that I would need to do a complete med pass with her observing me. I was shocked because I have been there a month and had made an error already by not giving a scheduled .25 of Ativan. The nurse I was with today said she beleived it was because I signed a med on a new admit but that the bingo tab had no pill missing so I did not give it to her. The initials (mine) are in a strange place and I DO NOT think I intitialed that. I recall that I did not have a med but cannot remember if I borrowed one (wrong, but the nurses I worked with did it) or talked to someone that I didn't have it or it it was even that patient. It seems like something happened and I guess it is my fault. Someone had to be going over the MAR very carefully to find an error like that.
It is a very busy floor with end stage patients receiving pallative care (dosing every 1/2 hour). Behaviors are present and the usual CBG's that should be done early and certain people eating that you have to get before they go to sleep, etc. I find it difficult to schedule my day not knowing my patients schedules. They are all on multiple medications as they are somewhat long term care and somewhat Rehab. I have been there for 1 month and have been trained on 3 different hallways. I am unable to remember 20 diags, faces, schedules and following three different nurses. I am a BRAND NEW nurse. I was teary and confused and found it difficult with what the nurse trainer told me and went to find her to talk more with her. She was in a meeting and my DON was not in. I left a message with my nurse and said I needed to clear my head (I could not focus and felt blind-sided and stupid and humiliated to have to start over). Maybe I could not do this job safely? I went home and left messages for my DON and the nurse trainer.
My question: Are they telling me to go? That is what I feel or am I being too sensitive?
Oct 28, '13
No, they are not telling you to go. They are telling you that they see you are struggling and are willing to work with you a little more to help you get up to speed. Take full advantage of that opportunity and show them that you can learn -- that you want to improve -- and are willing to work at it. I can understand why this set-back is disappointing, but don't let it derail you completely. It sounds like you have a boss and educator that are willing to give you some extra help-- and that is a good thing.
Get some rest, pull yourself together, and "get back on the horse" -- so to speak. A positive will help you go far. Falling apart and assuming the worst will only hold you back.