Rudeness - page 4

Why are some nurses so rude to each other? Our ER nurses have a horrible reputation for incivility to the floor nurses. Example-last night I pick up the phone. Someone who didn't identify herself asks if room 215 is clean... Read More

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    but do it nicely

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    While I don't condone the rude and childish yelling you endured, Thisnurse, I hope you can see his side of things.....just a little.

    I'm a night nurse who frequently gets to clean up after day and evening shifts' boo boos and oversights and it does get old...there comes a point where something has to be said...(hopefully professionally, so true). I'm sure you can relate when a nurse leaves something for you to do particularly when it may involve getting yelled at by a p'd off doc being awakened past midnite....they are NOT pleased. I'm having flashbacks now about the last time this happened with one of my GI docs (((shudder))

    I always stay and call the doc myself too with my abnormal late shift labs UNLESS the oncoming nurse wishes otherwise. Saves a lot of hurt feelings, plus we're being accountable for our practice.
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    Melly,

    I'm sorry to hear about the way you feel about ER nurses, but I do know what you are talking about, as I am an ER NURSE myself.

    Since 1976 untill 1998, I had always worked on the floor, in different capacities, housekeeping, certified nurses aide, ward clerk, lpn, and than rn in 1975.

    Having had a wide range of experience, I have experienced rudness from all ends of the hospital, in every department, in one way or another.

    I do not believe that we can just put it all on ER nurses, all though in the facility I work in now, I had reservations about going to the ER, because of the reputation of the nurses being rude.

    I had experienced the rudness when recieving report on several occasions, but I have to say, when I've given report to other floors, I've experienced the same thing.

    I've run into alot of wonderful, caring, thoughtful, nurses all over the hospital, and in the ER, as well.

    Unfortunatelly, you do come into contact with a nurse who is down right rude, not just sometimes, but rude all the time. It is their personality, and I've learned to take them with a grain of salt.

    My husband and I we're talking about this very thing last night, as he works in the same hospital I do also.

    In you specialty area's, like ICU, CCU, ER,I believe you will always run into nurses with strong, sometimes dominering, bossy, attitudes. But I find in these area's you have to have a strong personality to do the stressful work that we do. I have to say, that we are a different breed. Not that we are any better, because we are not, we just tend to have extremely strong personalities.

    Is it right to behave in the above fashion outlined, NO. I feel I have a very strong personality, and I don't put up with nonsense.
    But I believe I have a kind side also, and I truly try to treat people the way I would want to be treated, or even how I would want my loved one's to be treated. I love what I do, and I truly believe that I make a difference in a positive way.

    I have a good repore with the nurses on the floor, and in the other axillary departments, because I choose to be nice, even in a bad situation. Do I get ignorant sometimes, of course, who does'nt. We all have our days, but I do choose to apoligize where warranted, and I believe my peers respect me for that.

    I am a supervisor in the ER, and have 7 nurses underneath me, in the area that I supervise. One thing I tell them, is to try to think of at least one nice thing to say to someone they come into contact with every day, because we know it's easy to come up with something negative. I'm not an angel, and have shown my bad side more than once when provoked, but I try to avoid such times.

    I would like to throw this in, not only for ER nurses, but floor nurses as well. Please be remindful of patients privacy. You never know who may see what your doing, at any given moment.

    It is not the best policy to take an ekg, or give a bed bath, or place a patient on a commode, with the whole world watching. I've even had patients come in on the ambulance, that need to be placed in a gown, and are left wide open for everyone to see. I dont think it's right, I surely would not want to be the patient, feeling ill as it is, and flashing everyone to boot.

    Well enough for me. Again I apologize for the nurses in my setting Melly, that have been rude and unkind to you, there is no excuse, and in the long run, reflects badly on the nurses like myself who try hard to keep a good repore with nurses on other floors.

    If we could just see, that everyone is important, in whatever role they play in the work setting, from housekeeping, dietary, administration, nursing, and other anxillary departments, maybe we would'nt be so brash.


    TRY THIS - when you encounter someone on the phone, or in person, think of it as talking to your mother on the phone, or your favorite coach or teacher, etc, and you'll see how much nicer you can be.

    Michele- please feel free to reply to me
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    we all have our less than stellar personality moments. I just try to keep mine at a minimum....
    I can understand the night nurses frustration as I too am often cleaning up for the day/eveningshift
    ie - things they didnt get around to doing, missed labs that need intervention of somekind etc

    what I've said to the nurses involved is that nursing is 24/7 there will always be work to do, but with the whole lab thing, its much more effective to call on days/evenings because you can speak to the dr in charge of care for that pt, once 2300hrs comes everything gets left to medicince on call in my hospital, and they are often hesitant to act because they dont know the patient personally.....aside from that, no matter what there is work for all shifts to do, my problem is people who ALWAYS seem to leave things for me to do.....like chronic work avoider type people.

    we experience rudeness daily,heres my little story
    I was taking the bus home from a particularly bad 12 hr nite shift, when the bus jerked quickly and my bag bumped into this woman, I didnt even realize it had because I was listening to music and ppl were jerked into me too etc, so I feel her tap my shoulder, and say "watch your bag you hit me in the shoulder" I apologized politely and said that it wasnt intentional and she continued to ream me out saying that I need to pay more attention to others (keep in mind that I am in my scrubs as we speak, if you can show me a nurse who gets the chance not to pay attention to others for at least 11hrs of their 12 hour shift you take me to them!) I politely explained yet again that it was an accident and wouldnt happen again and that wasnt acceptable by her and she said that I was using my bag as a weapon!!!! *yes excuse me while I rob this bank, stick em up, I have my nike athletic bag, you dont want me to use it!!!*
    I just had enough, I nicely said, in a calm quiet tone but loud enough for those nearby to hear , that I had just been working for 12 hours with ppl who may not see tonight , and that if she was going to continue to be overly concerned about an accidental bump in the shoulder that she could continue talking and that I just wouldnt be responding anymore, and that in my opinion she needed to get some perspective, many of the ppl I work with would love to be able to ride a bus even if it came along with the occasional bump in the shoulder, and finally that if she is so fragile she shouldnt be riding public transportation *I know the last part came off sarcastic but I kept my nice tone of voice, but I was tired and ******!*
    needless to say I'm sure she felt like a big loser and she should have, we dont need to go around this world tryin to drag other ppl down
    bad day good day whatever, I dont readily take out my frustrations on others, so I dont buy that excuse, which seems to be the one people dish out after they have been a$$holes
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    Originally posted by Nittlebug
    My favorite line for rude people is: Lighten up, Lose the attitude and CUT ME SOME ******* SLACK !! Funny thing is I'm too nice to say it..... but the next person to ride my butt just might get it
    The last day at my last job soooo enjoyed saying this to my favorite(not) cardiologist as he threw a hissy fit at the desk; insisting I cater to his silly request when I was extremely busy with charge stuff.

    His jaw just about hit the floor and it felt so good say "Give me a ******* break...this is not an earth shaking problem here, is it Doc?" heheheheh:roll
    Last edit by mattsmom81 on Mar 31, '02
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    i can appreciate his anger. i understand it. ive had things left for me...on purpose and not. you can get your message across without raising your voice and throwing your papers.
    he could be as angry as he wanted ..but that wasnt going to change the fact that he might have to do a transfusion. as it turned out, he didnt even have to transfuse...just like i told him.

    that was his "freebie". ill let something like this go once and if it happens again ill give it right back.

    tempers are running high on our unit because our acuity is so bad. when i work daylight and fill out the staffing report for my patients i wonder why i even bother. i can describe their acuity but we dont get the staff to cover anyway. all that seems to matter is numbers.

    ripping each others heads off isnt going to improve anything.
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    [QUOTE]Originally posted by thisnurse
    [B]last night i made a mistake. i had a h and h draw at 7p that i didnt see until 920 pm. i drew it and sent it. pt has rectal bleeding and his last h and h was 9./27, drawn 6 hours earlier. i didnt realize that i had q6 labs and that was never reported off to me. still, i know thats up to me, im not blaming the previous nurse.

    at 1030 while i was double checking my charting (3 to 11 shift)
    i checked the h and h and it was 8/24.
    i guess i should have called the doc that very second but i didnt. i let it go and reported it to the next shift.

    the nurse i reported off to was WAY pizzed. i can understand being upset that he was now going to have to deal with this, but what i cant understand is his childlike behavior.
    i made a MISTAKE...i dont normally do this. i dont pass off work, ill stay and complete what i have to do. in fact, i did stay and call the doc...checked the chart for transfusion orders (there werent any) and found the consent. i told the doc what i had done and she was way cool about it...said it wasnt a big deal and she would be up to see if she was going to transfuse.
    it was nearly midnight. next h and h was to be drawn at 1 am.

    well the nurse was having a fit. he went in and drew the h and h at midnight. i told him what the doc had said....she wasnt even sure if she was going to transfuse him anyway because at that point he was asymptomatic and she didnt know what the attending had planned for him. in other words, she was putting it off as long as she could.



    You called the physician, there was no blood ordered so at the end of the day, no harm was done with this incident. It appears you would have done things earlier if this happen were to happen again, but why make a issue over this is beyond me.

    One thing I've learnt in life and this is what goes around comes around.
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    micro believes in the rules, but also that some rules are stupid.......and made up by people and organizations believing that they are perfect.......hence keeps them in the job.........

    like, duh.....it has been a killer of a shift.....any of you here know what I am talking about......and duh.....I forget to sign out a tylenol.....but I tell you in report I gave it.........

    write me a variance, sing me a song......be anal retentive all the day long.......

    warping out micro.........love this bb and threads.....but better get some sleep.....or the REAL MICRO COMES OUT TO PLAY!!!!!
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    IMHO,a lot of rudeness stems from someone's judgment of your performance and the expectations based on that judgment.

    A common theme throughout this thread is that someone "ought to" have done something and it was not done.

    For instance, "She OUGHT TO take report the millisecond that I am ready to give it, since she OUGHT TO understand that we're getting backed up down here." Or "I know she wants to give me report right now, but she OUGHT TO understand that one of my patients is having severe intractable pain and I see his Doc trying to run off the floor before I get an order for a pain management consult, the sniveling little coward."

    Instead of assuming that we're trying to avoid work, we need to assume that we're all doing as much as we can, as fast as we can.

    Maybe we need to step back a little and look at the big picture--if it's happening to all of us, if it "comes with the territory," maybe we need to redefine the territory and stop voting with our feet.
    Just a thought.
    ((((hugs to all)))))
    :kiss
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    Originally posted by mario_ragucci
    I used to get all bent out of shape when people would disrespect me or bark in my face. Times like these call us to draw upon our own power and strength. Many folks will try to nip each other in the bud when they get out of line by biting back. This doesn't always accomplish anything worthwhile, and can even worsen the situation. You have to stop and think before you react to rudeness.

    Try to help the rude person. They obviously have a problem with their manners, or, maybe you are the recipiant of rudeness they have experienced, and are attempting to transfer to you. You must be strong and sure of your own self not to let these antics get the best of you. As an "up and coming" professional healthcare provider, I see my potential coworkers as not beyond illness themselves. I'll be dealing with ill people, and other people who deal with ill people, so some of that illness will be in my face, in various forms.

    Try to make your reactions to rudeness in check. Don't let your forcefield get so weak as to allow negativity to burst you too. :roll
    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

    I like your reaction and outlook. Mature and professional. At times we are all stressed out. It helps to rise above and not allow yourself to "get hooked" by another's stress level.
    "I'm sorry you are having a bad day..I've been there myself. I'll do what I can to help." Keep in mind..some people just have personality flaws and the worst comes out under stress.

    Also know that E.R. nursing is becoming so much more stressful these days. It is becoming the norm for those who do not have medical insurance and do not have a doctor to just show up at the ER..usually when symptoms have gotten beyond tolerable.
    Here's a quote from "Nursing News" elsewhere on this website:


    Reda has been working in the emergency department at Newton-Wellesley for at least six years. She works both as a charge nurse and at the bedside and knows full well the demands of the job. She knows the rewards too.
    On a Wednesday afternoon earlier this month, Reda was the charge nurse responsible for coordinating beds for all of the patients visiting by ambulance or foot. Within minutes she has to find a bed for a patient coming in by ambulance.
    One rule applies to everyone regardless of age, race and financial status: the most critical patients are seen first and the rest wait - sometimes for an hour and sometimes for eight.
    With more people using fewer emergency rooms the daily task of finding beds and space is daunting. In the last two years Newton-Wellesley has seen it's volume grow by 2,100 patients to 36,901 visiting the emergency department (ED) last year.

    Reda searches for a bed in the full ED with 17 patients and three in the waiting room. It's an effort that sometimes requires Reda to put less critical people in the hall or try to get patients admitted upstairs to free up beds in the ED.
    Many nurses are choosing to leave the field because the job has become increasingly difficult and stressful requiring nurses to work longer hours and care for more patients. But Reda said she enjoys the fast pace.
    "I love my job," she said. "I love taking care of patients."


    So...I have compassion for the ER nurses and the patients who have been waiting. I am stressed on the floor, too...but I try to call back for report within 10 minutes if I possibly can.
    Our charge nurse who makes the bed assignments calls the head of housekeeping for a stat room clean if a bed isn't available. Works well unless housekeeping is short staffed, too.


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