Eating When You Are Not Hungry

Nurses Stress 101

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Specializes in 30 years of marriage to a nurse.

I was observing my dog Gabby eat the other day. She would munch some kibble, stop for a while, and ponder whether or not she was done, then possibly eat some more, and quit when she was satisfied. I believe that it is a good thing to eat when you are hungry, especially when the food is good. The temptation with really good food is to keep eating when your hunger is long satisfied, and I'm afraid my saintly puppy might start wolfing down a plate of sumptuous table food without restraint if tempted in that way. I believe in the notion that you should quit eating when your hunger has been satisfied.

I don't believe in dieting. During a diet, food deprivation causes the body to adapt and change. The body learns that it needs to conserve and store what it can. When people complete their diet it doesn't take long for them to gain back everything they lost, plus some extra just in case. How healthy is it to go through cycles of weight loss and weight gain? My contention is that sticking to the idea of eating when you are hungry is the best way to discover your natural weight and maintain it.

One of the big weight loss issues is eating when you are not hungry. People who eat when they are not hungry are seeking to meet some other need. Using food to try and satisfy a need that has nothing to do with food just doesn't work. There are some hungers of the human soul that can never be satisfied with food no matter how much food you eat, because it's not a hunger for food but a hunger for something else. Discovering what that "something else" is, is important.

If you have a tendency to binge on food you could try to get in touch with what you are feeling and thinking at the time it is happening, and write it down. What I have discovered is that the kind of self talk people have at that time can be destructive. For example: "I've already blown my diet, I might as well eat the whole box", or "I am such a loser". Often the messages we tell ourselves are simply not true. Sometimes the inner dialogue sounds like an old tape from the past that has been internalized. It has become your script. The painful things we tell ourselves leave us feeling a deep sense of emptiness which then fuels the binge. These internal messages need to be examined for their truthfulness. Usually they are just lies that need to be debunked.

When you feel like bingeing what is needed is not a new set of put downs like "You should know better", but a big picture affirmation of who you are. The Bible is full of affirmations of God's love for you , and who you are in Christ, and these can be helpful to reflect on. Think of your strengths and the qualities that others have affirmed about you. Tell yourself things that are true and good about you. This will move you away from the pain. Telling yourself the truth about who you really are, is the only way to satisfy this inner hunger, food won't do it.

Perhaps it's time to do a little work on cleaning up your self talk. You have to stamp on the ants. ANTS is an acrostic for Automatic Negative Thoughts.

I, too, have a problem with over-eating. It doesn't have so much to do with being self-depreciative, but rather from lack of self-control.

I have an addictive personality. When I say that, it's really an excuse for "I over eat because food tastes good." A lot of my habits and my comforts are engraved with food. If I come back from a long weekend out and I'm exhaused, feeling like I've accomplished something, I'll get it in my head that nothing sounds better than a delicious meal topped off with a lot of R&R time. Unfortunately I have a lot of these weekends that actually carry into the weekdays. The same goes for if the weekend sucks and I just want to relax -- I'll tell myself that I deserve this delicious huge meal and that it'll comfort me. I don't have the willpower to tell myself no.

Another problem I have is the this is the last time, I swear. I always tell myself that after this last binge I'm going to calm down and start working out and eating healthier. Of course tomorrow never comes and I get lazy. I don't have the willpower to make myself do these things.

The biggest problem is myself and lack of self-discipline. I am working on this.

Currently, I'm about 90-100 pounds overweight, but I don't look like it. I look maybe 50-60 pounds but I know the true reality of the situation. I tell people how much I weigh (300 lbs.) and the look of awe on their face is hilarious. They say that I look closer to 230 or 240. This may be because I did a lot of weight lifting not too long ago and instead of losing weight, I was gaining weight because as I was working out, I would overeat even more, telling myself that I could afford it because I was working out. Bad news.

Another issue I've noticed is that I'll binge for a week before I'm going to start a diet, telling myself that I'm going to earn it later anyways. What I've done lately to combat this goes as follows:

I planned a two week diet, two weeks in advance. EXTREME CALORY REDUCTION. For the two weeks leading up to the diet, I would not let myself binge at all. I was moderating my portions and eating less than usual, preparing myself for the diet. To me, this is helping to strengthen my willpower and make me stronger for when I'm off the diet, so that I may develop healthier eating habits both before and after the diet. I was successful and now I've made it to the diet portion.

Now that I'm on the diet, I've planned to start working out, but I've been easy on myself with that, telling myself that there's no need to rush into working out and that sticking to the diet is my priority. So far, it's been DIFFICULT, but I've done it. The trouble is, while I'm on this diet, my family has been eating regular food, buying all kinds of junk food and the smell, sight, and presence just make me want to DIE. It's almost intolerable at times, but again, I let myself know that it's all about willpower. How will breaking my diet benefit me in the long run? It won't. I keep telling myself that food is always going to be there and I've already enjoyed it for long enough, it's time to break the habit and beat my weight.

That's where I am right now and I know that was a ten page rant... sorry folks, but I will say that I feel 200% better now just typing all this out.

Thanks for listening.

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