Failing, and it'sall my fault

[Ayala]

This is kind of an extension of the "Another One BitesThe Dust" thread. I did not want to monopolize that discussion with my own problems. I am about to fail Fundamentalsof Nursing because I am unable to pass the validations. I don't know what the problem is, but obviously it's my fault. I've gone for help, worked in the practice lab for hours, etc. but when my clinical instructor is watching me there are some validations (Open gloving !!!!) I just can't get right.

I have been given the opportunity to be revalidated and have accepted it. What is wrong with me? My grades are excellent, and all my instructors say I am "putting my heart and soul" into the program. It's not for lack of effort. During my medsemester evaluation my Clinical Instructor told me that "maybe it's time for you to do something else."

I am not blaming anybody. I am trying to figure out how to make the best of a bad situation. I feel horrible - as if I'm sitting on death row waiting for my execution date. I don't want to quit. I want to give it my best effort until the very last day.

Advice? Suggestions?

[xtxrn, ASN, RN]

Tell yourself you CAN do it... that may sound dorky, but having the mental defeat can kill you. Go through the steps in your head- write them down on flash cards, do anything that is repetitive that drills it in- the only way any of us "crusty old bats" got it was because we DID it over and over and over. I haven't put in an IV in 7 years- but I can still go through it in my head like it was yesterday.

Part of the problem isn't really a problem- you are doing something SO totally new that it hasn't become "automatic" for you :)

Hang in there

[Ayala]

I want to thank all of you for your advice and support. I have my last clinical class (Yay!) tomorrow morning. I'm dreading the experience, but the sooner I part company with this instructor, the better. (Not that I'm blaming her for my own mistakes.)

I have been going through the torments of hell over the past couple of weeks. I met with my shrink today. I see him once a month - I take Prozac for depression. He gave me a scrip for an anti-anxiety med and told me "This too shall pass." So pass, just pass already! I want this to be over.

But I won't quit now. I want to leave strong, knowing I made my best effort. I will be revalidated next week (without my clinical proffessor in the room). I hope and pray I can pull it together by then. I know all the validations inside and out. It's just that my clinical professor makes me so nervous she gives me stage fright.

Wish me well!

[FreshLittleStudent]

I am about to have my head to toe tomorrow...56% of my health assessment grade. I understand your nerves PERFECTLY. What HAS helped me get through my nursing fundamentals semester is simply taking things one day at a time. I would get so overly worked up over every checkoff in lab, get sick to my stomach in lecture, and cry in health assessment. I finally got the point of preparing for the following day (good or bad), putting a smile on my face, and carrying a poem or blog that will make me smile. (Try Nurse's Pride on this website - that one is BEAUTIFUL) That has helped me get to the end of this semester with most of my sanity, about half of my brain, and I am not sick with nerves about tomorrow.

Good luck and best wishes.

[Ayala]

Tomorrow is the big day. The last couple of weeks have been horrible. Many unforseen circumstances have popped up. I've been practicing, studying, working on the anxiety, etc. But each new day brings a new pothole. I thought I was going to hang it up today. But I'm holding on!!!!

My clinical teacher failed so many people at the last minute that the people who run the clinical lab are spitting bullets. (Rightfully so. They have to set up the revalidations.) When I got my final review with my clinical professor,she passed me "pending passing the revalidations." At least I knew I was going to have to be revalidated. Several students were told on the last day of class that they had to be revalidated!

All hell is breaking loose. Tension is through the stratosphere. Just hang on another 24 hours, Ayala. You can do it. People are rooting for you, praying for you and wishing you well. I refuse to be intimidated by one teacher. No matter what obstacles she throws in my path.

I pray to accept God's will for me.

[portalhop]

I hope that you come out successful, Ayala.