I've heard it said that nurses tend to be enablers in general. After all, it's that "caretaking personality" that tends to gravitate towards the nursing profession in the first place. Well, that's fine at work but not outside of work. I've seen more nurses (and other healthcare providers including doctors) get involved in dead-end relationships with very needy people that "need to be fixed"..... Only to find that they can't be.
I spent 12 years married to a man that was needy, possesive and dependent. I found the "attention" flattering at first. It was nice to be needed and I thought with some TLC that he would grow and change.
Wrong.
I made the mistake of marrying him...thinking then he would become more independent and less obsessive. He only got worse over the years. Soon enough his problems grew to include alcoholism. He basically sucked the life right out of me and anyone else around him. Getting divorced took a whole lot longer and more work than getting married.
Lesson is: It's ok to be needed at work....but check your motives in a relationship with a needy man (or woman). I promise you, they will not change for the better...and you cannot fix them. They can only fix themselves. And as long as we're there to pick up after them, why should they?
So, if you are in a relationship that sounds suspiciously like the afore mentioned, run for the hills and don't look back. You'll do both of you a favor.
By the way...I am doing wonderful these days. I date only "quality" independent men that have a life of their own. Right now, I am seeing a doctor...that (you guessed right) was married to a needy, dependent woman. Imagine that? We are enjoying our easy, non-eventful friendship.
Any experiences out there?? Sound familiar to anyone? Your thoughts are welcomed.
