I had the honor of being placed on the CCU/SICU unit of my hospital for a externship this past summer, and stayed on as a tech until graduation in Dec. I'm taking the NCLEX this Friday, and am a mix of emotions. I started my new job already, and am wondering if my high level of stress is making me want to run for the hills.
I was fortunate enough to receive 3 job offers following graduation, but this was my first offer, and being a new graduate, jumped on the opportunity with no second thought. I'm really hoping that I don't regret that.
During my externship, I was paired with an amazing, young nurse who built my confidence in nursing skills and assessment. I focused mainly on tasks, with a goal in mind to become more comfortable in the role. I dealt with vents, chest tubes, lines, wires, pacemakers, you name it (brand new open hearts). I eagerly learned from her, but didn't overwhelm myself with everything there is to know about a heart patient (I didn't even think a job offer was a possibilty).
So here is my issue: I'm brand new and freaking out. Sure I have experience for the floor, knowing where things are at, some of the nurses, and who the main doctors are. I am familiar with items I've seen, but obviously don't know all there is to know. They are giving me 6 weeks, yes, 18 days of training. Then I'm on my own with the hopes that I can continue to annoy the nurses with multiple questions. I am also in a casual position, with the promise that upon completion of orientation, I will obtain full time, night shift status (this has changed a few times). Nights, are so difficult for me, I'm exhausted. The nurses on nights are waaaaay different thatn those on days; with only a couple who are accepting and willing to teach me (this is the shift I'm training on). Nurses are leaving this floor left and right, and are constantly complaining about work and low staffing ratios. As a student, I always thought that people complain just to complain, but it's actually becoming very scary. Communication isn't the greatest, and I feel like an unwanted crumb on the bottom of their shoes.
I decided to focus my attention on the NCLEX this week. I have told my preceptor what I want to learn, and occasionally get a few things here and there. I plan to talk with the manger about some of these issues, but don't even know where to start. I made myself a list of exactly what I feel I need to work on and go over, but am not too confident of how receptive the nurses will be. (due to what I have felt and received thus far, including the eye rolling). I'm worried that the environment is not safe, and patient care/safety will be compromised. I don't want to lose my license, that I hope to be getting in a few days. What does everyone think? I'm sure I'll hear stick it out, but I'm really afraid to. I plan to at least hang in there until I have the license in hand. Advice?