You might just need a change of scenery. My first job was at a pretty small community hospital in the suburbs of NYC. I couldn't stand it. I felt like almost everyone/everything was working against me be it the patients, management, my fellow nurses, support staff..it was dreadful. The way things were done was just fractured and I felt like management really played favorites. For example they never had enough coverage so I was expected to punch out for my meal break and keep working anyway. Other nurses on the floor in the same position as me didn't have to do that..they were able to get away and sit down to eat..the charge nurse covered their meals..she refused to do it for me and a few others though. If NY state did an audit they would have thrown a fit..I worked human resources(not in healthcare though..this was before I even went to nursing school
) many years ago and I know all about state labor laws. Not to mention its not like no one took a meal break...the favorites did. I also mentioned this in another thread but a lot of my co-workers were very cliquey(is that a word? Lol)...they always stuck together and went out of their way to exclude others.
Everything about my first job really left a lot to be desired even the patients. Being a community hospital in a well to do long island town the patients were very snobby(not all of them but a good percentage) they always had an entourage with them(hospital rule was only 2 at a time at the bedside) and of course when I went to enforce the hospital policy half the time one of the members of the patients posse would go over my head after I told them two at a time and always the person they asked underminded me right in front of them and told them they could all stay. I cant tell you how many times I've gotten complaints from the roommates and their visitors of those patients and their loud posse of visitors. I actually thought being a nurse was a mistake and wanted to go find another career all together.
Luckily I got another job in the city which I loved. My co-workers were great, the patients were great(genuinely very sick people who were always gracious and full of gratitude for the care that I provided) they even had a nurse float so I could actually get off my feet for a moment and eat something. I actually left that job though for my current because I had a lot of health problems and actually took over a year off...I just never went back. My friend actually got me my current position which happened to have better pay and I actually love it too. Inner city 1000 plus bed tertiary hospital. Its completely the opposite of my first job in that small, suburban community hospital. I like the hustle and bustle of city life..you mention you are at a busy trauma center..maybe a smaller community hospital would be the right fit for you or home health care. A lot of former co-workers of mine left to work home health care or for agency nursing and they have nothing but great things to say. For me it was a matter of changing the scenery...but I do know this profession isn't a once size fits all profession. What works for me might not for another.