Need to vent about not being able to VENT!!!

[NurseCard, ADN]

Okay, so I have admitted in the past to having slight anger management issues. I'm one of these people that, when I get angry, frustrated, upset, whatever... it just tends to come OUT. I've worked on this and I've taken anti-anxiety meds, which have helped. I just have a temper, plain and simple.

Like I said though, I've tried to work on doing more constructive things when I get really angry. If at all possible, if someone/something really ticks me off, I excuse myself and go sit in the bathroom for ten minutes and cool off.

ALL OF THAT having been said... I still really have to vent every now and then. Let me give you the most recent example. This is my third 12 hour shift this week. These three nights, I've had the same hallway. I have a pancreatitis patient, a patient with excrutiating left flank pain of unknown etiology, a patient who just had his gallbladder out but also has severe pain/pain control issues and WAY elevated liver enzymes. A very large lady with a fractured fibula. A small bowel obstruction. And a couple more patients. Several of these patients are also diabetic. Several of them have IV fluids running VERY fast. And, this week two-three of them have had blood pressure issues. This has all translated into LOTS of pain medicine passes, lots of changing of IV bags, lots of finger sticks, lots of early morning meds... just a BUSY BUSY hallway. And what has really been even more frustrating... the other hallway has been CAKE, all week, for the most part. The patients down the other hallway don't even call out all night long. The nurse who had that hallway two nights ago, had a 6am IV flush to do at the end of the shift, and that was IT.

It's been somewhat frustrating, and I'm just TIRED. I don't walk into patient rooms and just start hollering at them "WHY do you keep calling out for pain medicine??? Dammit!!!!" :chuckle, but the last patient that called out for pain medicine a few minutes ago... well, *I* wasn't even the first to complain, my tech was. She was like, "That north hall!!!" and shook her head. I then said something to the effect of "I know! They've just been crazy like that all week!!!" Well, the unit clerk piped up, "Cathy! (me), you know that these patients have NEEDS, and they can't help it!" She says things like this all the time. I realize that they have needs. But I have been run RAGGED this week, and I've been lucky to get a few minutes to sit down at any given time and do much of anything other than some charting. This person is rather judgemental anyway, and lately I feel like any time I say ANYTHING, she's looking at me and scoffing at me and judging me to be this horrible person.

A lot of times I just feel like I'm working in an environment where I'm expected to be Miss Merry Sunshine every minute of the night, and I'm just not like that. In fact, I am a rather negative person and know that I need to perhaps work on that. There are people that work here who also get frustrated and vent and such, but then there are a lot of people who have the above attitude. I think the more that I have sunshine shoved up my butt, the more I'm likely to turn the other way and be negative.

I'm just trying to do my job the best I can and take care of these patients. I could just totally be ignoring them, or taking 30-45 minutes to respond to their pain medicine requests, like I've seen other nurses do in the past.

*sigh* I don't know. I guess I'm just Scrooge. :icon_evil

[weetziebat]

I then said something to the effect of "I know! They've just been crazy like that all week!!!" Well, the unit clerk piped up, "Cathy! (me), you know that these patients have NEEDS, and they can't help it!" She says things like this all the time. I realize that they have needs. But I have been run RAGGED this week, and I've been lucky to get a few minutes to sit down at any given time and do much of anything other than some charting. This person is rather judgemental anyway, and lately I feel like any time I say ANYTHING, she's looking at me and scoffing at me and judging me to be this horrible person.

Aww, Cathy, I'm so sorry for your awful week at work. Lots of :icon_hug:. Why do they put you guys on the same hall all three days when one side is so much heavier than the other? Seems only commom sense to alternate nurses, so you don't go crazy!

I'm normally a pretty optimistic person but must agree that if I am feeling frustrated, getting run ragged and another light goes on, I would strangle a clerk who chose that moment to tell me about patient needs! Its not like you don't know about them. Maybe if she had to run her butt off she might change her tune. Great to be postive but there is a time you should keep your mouth shut too.

Please feel free to come here anytime to vent. We understand. Its great that you realize you have anger management issues, and are working on ways to deal with it. The going into the bathroom for 10 minutes to cool off sounds great. Will have to remember that one!

Hope things improve. Are you off for a few days now? A friend of mine told me something once about all the BS we sometimes have to put up with at work. He said 'Remember, let it all go in one ear and out the other, and never let it settle in your heart - you'll go crazy if you do'. Helps me.

[DusktilDawn]

Perhaps you can nicely and in your sweetest voice suggest to the clerk, that until she has RAN a mile in your Birkenspoks perhaps she should think before she speaks. The problem is that it is easy for non-nursing staff not involved in direct patient care to be judgemental. I don't think what you said was was wrong, you were just expressing frustration, in a mild way and not directed towards the patients, but more towards your situation. You could also point out that it is easy for her to make these comments because she gets her breaks and no doubt leaves on time and in-between is able to accomplish her work and no doubt have free time to boot. You have two choices: you can either discuss this with her, or ignore her.

BTW: Can you tell that I have to put with a Clerk who shops on E-Bay all the time and does no work. :devil:

Well I'm not trying to shove sunshine up your butt here, but I have been in a place where I realized how negative my attitude was getting and how that impacted how my shift went, the stress level, and the care I provided on my job. When I realized this, I was able to change my attitude towards how I felt in doing my job, a positive outlook in general can help. It's also easier to deal with frustration when you haven't had three nights of it. Being able to vent once in a while also helps, as long as it is in a "safe" place (not in front of patients).

I just have a temper, plain and simple.

No my friend, we actually have the choice in how we respond/react. Sometimes it's about finding another method to cope, and hopefully a positive one. Sometimes the glass is half-full, instead of always being half-empty. What we have no control over is how others respond/react.

A friend of mine told me something once about all the BS we sometimes have to put up with at work. He said 'Remember, let it all go in one ear and out the other, and never let it settle in your heart - you'll go crazy if you do'. Helps me.

That is excellent Weetzie, I will have to remember this jem.

[Indy, LPN, LVN]

Don't let the secretary get to you. That being said, we have one who gets to me. On my floor this week we had a patient who gained weight despite diuresing massively. Which IS possible but we don't usually see that. The nurses brainstormed for several days on how to figure out if her weight was accurate; without getting the nurse from the night before to physically come show you what she did, you won't know what scale she used.

Oh, and it's complicated by the fact that the patient is so big, and so demanding, that no one has her two nights in a row. So the secretary says out loud, "SOMEONE doesn't know how to weigh this patient." I thought of the lovely things I'd like to say, then promptly went and did something else. Because with this person you can't shut her up if you respond. She once went in a patient's room to talk to him (not her business and not her job) and asked me if I knew what I was doing. I answered, "yes." And proceeded to talk to the patient as if she wasn't there.

I feel your pain with regard to temper issues. I've taken to cussing out my dog in the mornings when I get off work. We walk, he poops and pees, I say all kinds of horrible things to no one in particular and he doesn't tell.

As for the issues with having a heavy load and unbalanced assignment for 3 days running, well that's something to take up with the charge nurse or the nurse manager. Your load sounds like it is regularly twice what I have, I'm impressed you get anything done at all.

-Indy

[flashpoint]

I just dreaded weeks like that. I always had the brand new nurses who only had two patients or the CNAs who got assigned to 1 SNF patient telling what a good night "we" were having as I ran my you know what off with my 5 or 6 or 8 patients who were just shy of critical and using the commode every 5 minutes. In all reality....I'm glad I am not there anymore...just need to find my place in the world now...

[RosesrReder, BSN, MSN, RN]

Thank goodness for allnurses, come vent whenever you need to. Best wishes to you.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Sounds like you're aware of your strengths and weaknesses.

Sometimes when I'm tired and overworked it's easy to fall into a negative frame of mind and look at the dark side and be a gloomy person to be around. Being Susie Sunshine all the time isn't the answer either. Realistic balance.

We need to vent. At least we can come here. :)

[MTBanRN]

An even better thing would be if they put some punching bags in a room so that all those who are frustrated can take it all out on the punching bags. A break room with work out equipment would also suffice.

[matchstickxx]

I think there must be some sort of JCAHO guideline that states every hospital must have at least 1 unit clerk like this. I worked with such a unit clerk on a postpartum unit. I would get a dose of "Merry Sunshine-ism" if I would whine about multiple deliveries occurring nearly at once and all due to be transferred to our unit within minutes of each other. Yes, I understand I wouldn't have a job if we didn't have deliveries...I would just prefer they were more spaced out and I had enough nurses to take these admits. At times I felt as though I was her special target nurse. I also knew she would criticize me behind my back. I finally realized how I was allowing her comments/ pollyanna snipes to really get to me. I decided I would react to her with kindness overkill and stop allowing her to upset me.

As far as your lopsided assignment goes....Are assignments solely based on location. If so, I think that is a horrible way to make assignments. Obviously it is not fair to you but also it isn't fair to the patients on that hall. If you had only half of the high acuity patients and half of the "sleeps all night" patients, you would have more time to devote to the needier patients. If this sort of patient distribution happens regularly, I would take the issue to your unit manager. If they insist on staying with a location based assignment then they need a better process to assign the higher acuity admissions to different halls.

I hope you have a few days off coming up. It sounds like you need it. Hopefully some of those patients will be gone when you return to work.

Feel free to come here and vent anytime.

[LydiaNN]

I love the line about having sunshine shoved up your butt. I must remember that, as I am no fan of it, either.

[SmilingBluEyes]

I think it's time they balanced the load more evenly. If that other hall was so quiet, it would NOT have been the end of the world for that nurse(s) to help YOU out, ya know. Whatever happened to teamwork? If I have a lighter load, I will step in and help my coworkers who have heavier-care patients. It's only fair, and it's about TEAMWORK.

Don't be "Merry Sunshine" Ask for HELP.

[Judee Smudee, ADN, RN]

I think it is a lot better to emphasize with a person and say, "yeah that is a tough hall". People who give you a lecture and blow sunshine up your butt are a pain. I had a secretary like that and I disliked her intensely. You should have heard how she yelled and screamed about her own assignment. If I said that 12 patients and all their needs was to much for me she pontificated all over me. However, she was allowed to complain about doing paper work all day. I even did a post on her once and called her a weasel.