I only held his hand

I was assigned a patient tonight in clinical that was getting prepared for emergency surgery. He was in extreme pain and his nurse gave him dilaudid for the first time. I was asked to stay with him while she called the doctor to update him on the status of the patient's condition. He was panting and shaking and kept repeating "I can't breathe."

I started out by trying to reassure him that he was breathing and his O2 stats were perfect. But no change in his condition. I was frustrated (not with him) because I felt like there was nothing I could do to make him feel better and wondered what in the world would convince the nurse to leave me alone with him???? So, out of desperation I sat on the side of his bed, grabbed his hands, made sure he looked in my eyes and had him breathe in and out with me and tried to keep the both of us from panicking (To be honest I needed the breathing as much as he did ). He calmed almost immediately. He squeezed my hands and said simply thank you. He asked me to stay with him until his family got there...... And then it hit me.... He was scared. He was alone. He thought he might be dying. I only held his hand but I helped him feel less afraid. I helped the person, not the assignment. I made a difference. I felt like a nurse.

It was amazing