my classmates HATE me

thank you, peach pie!

i agree whole heartedly.

i've been called the "b" word so many times, and ea time, i smile.

thanks again.

leslie

first i am sorry you are going through this. second, don't go down to their level. your instructors will see that you are smart and independent. don't let others get in the way of what you are working so hard for.

just be kind to everyone and do what you are there to do, study to be a nurse.

Yes, the best things that you can do are covering your butt and gaining credibility with your instructors.

Just remember why your in nursing school and focus on that. I just finshed nursing school myself and I had the same problem so I can understand you, but remember you are not there to make friends, you are there to learn and to be the very best nurse you can be.

I'm torn between the advice that encourages you to ignore it and speaking up for yourself.

Being treated rudely, being accused of cheating, "ditry angry looks" might go away if you confront and ask people "when you just looked at me with what I interpret as a "dirty and angry look" it made me feel bad, what are you thinking and what's your intention? Please be brutally honest, but it's affecting me." Chances are they are going to lie and say "It was nothing" but it lets them know how it makes you feel and they might stop it just so you don't confront them. Or in the best of worlds someone might be honest with you.

I agree that thick skin in nursing is a must, and we must learn how to deal with all sorts of people. I choose my battles. Sometimes I ignore rudeness, but most of the time I don't. I deal with peers a bit differently than I do peers. Peers it's more of a "this is how you made me feel just now...is that what you intended" type of approach. With patients and family members it's "I understand that you're angry, and I might be angry too if it were my loved one. Let's talk some more about that...." or the old "you sound angry", or to simply ignore it.

One thing I completely agree with, is that you're there with a goal and that goal isn't to make friends. Good luck to you.

excellent article peach pie, its just what i needed to hear.

thank you

Thank you to all of you who gave me advice about how to handle this situation.

My attititude towards "my friends" has changed and the right thing to do is to walk away from these toxic relationships and concentrate on my studies. If i find other like minded people great! if i dont, thats ok too.

Thank you once again

Hello Hello:) ~~

All I can say is -- you have to do YOUR best to "do whatchya gotta do" ~~ I'm not one to advise on HOW. It is individualistic:) It IS unfortunate and uncomfortable to be in such a situation. You just need to decide what is important to you and how to go about handling those things:) Balance is key:) Peace of mind is priceless!

I walk into a room full of classmates that I can NOT stand and the feeling is reciprocated. That is no exaggeration nor perception, it is fact. I have been transplanted (due to finances I was out an entire year a short while ago) into a class that has no work ethic whatsoever -- they are EXtremely UNprofessional, lazy & DISRESPECTFUL among other things. They create a terrible environment (with their constant mumblings, chatter, etc) that is not conducive to an effective learning environment. I am disgusted on a daily basis by this.

Yet -- I do my best do deal w/it as I see fit....I keep my professionalism and fulfill the high standards I have for myself, knowing I will be proud of the nurse I'm becoming:)

Stay encouraged and uplifted!!

Hi:

My name is Stephanie and I just joined allnurses today. Currently I am finishing nursing prerequisites and hoping to get accepted in to a nursing program.

The reason I respond to you is because on my current job, I deal with the same thing you deal with in class. At first, all I thought about was quitting, but then it dawned on me, I'm working towards a greater goal and these folks giving me a hard time will STILL be in the same place years from now.

I know it's hard, but ignore what they are doing, what are they going to do when they start working in the "real world." In most organizations, that crap would not fly and they would be out of there. If need to, talk to someone about what is going on. Don't let them run you out. You are working towards a greater goal and they shouldn't be in your way!

Good luck and I hope this helps!

Steph

What goes around comes around! Soon after I was terminated from that place, the b...h got kicked in the mouth by her horse and had to have her jaws wired shut for 8 wks! Also, she was arrested for theft and her husband left her. She is not working as a nurse.

WOW...rnrae...EXTREME goes around comes around stuff!!! ( but oddly satisfying :devil:!) Go that horse!!:lol2:

justice indeed!

hallo everyone,

When i started nursing school i made a handful of friends in my class. However, one of the friends i had during pre-nursing dumped me soon after we got to nursing school. She never actually said i dont want to be friends, she just started treating me really badly. She was rude to me and would mock the way i speak and make fun of some of the things i would say. Well, i ignored her and eventually we stoped talking altogether.

I think she started spreading rumours about me, because one by one all our other friends started treating me the same way. I asked them why they were treating me like dirt and whether i had done anything to upset them. They said that i had not done anything and everything was ok. Later i would find out that they had study sessions or had lunch together and had not invited me to join them. Last year one of them told our instructor that i was looking at her paper doing an exam. I was mortified. I could not believe that she would accuse me of cheating. I would never do anything that stupid. We have not talked since that incident. I think that now they are telling people that i dont want to study with them because i can do better without them etc etc.

Recently i have noticed that when I do talk to my other classmates I get dirty, angry looks. I dont know what is being said about me now.

I am at my wits end. I am having such a difficult time concentrating on my studies, today i just felt like giving up and applying to another nursing school. i really dont know what to do. I can't confront anybody because i dont know who in the group is spreading rumours about me. I also cannot take another day of snickering and sneering behind my back.

If anyone has any suggestions about how to handle this situation, i am listening!

just thought i would let you know that i confronted one of the classmates that has really given me a hard time.

She denied everything (as i expected) and went on to say that she was offended that i would accuse her of talking behind my back. She basically turned everything around and made it sound as though i was the one at fault.

Well, i shot back that i didnt care whether she was offended or not, she should stop her crap either way. I told her to stay out of my life, dont talk to me and dont try to do me any favours. I think i got my message across loud and clear. We will see whether confronting her helped the situation. i dont know, but it really felt good standing up for myself.

In my experience study groups do nothing but cause trouble. You are better off if you study by yourself or maybe with one other person. But when you get a group together it spells trouble every time. They will soon turn on each other.

Keep going and dont let them bring you down. Most people dont have much contact with people they went to school with anyway after school. I bet i havent seen one or two of the people i went to nursing school with more than once since. And it doesnt bother me a bit.

That has been my observation as well. I never studied with people because I used to see what happened when one did exceptionally better than others; the ones that did poorly expected the 'smarter' one to help them cheat, or were insanely jealous. I stayed alone in school, graduated the top of the class, and didn't even show up for my own graduation, because passing so high meant nothing to me...passing NCLEX was the only path that was going to allow me to practice as a nurse. I never discussed grades or answers to tests with people, after the exam, I used to keep it moving. And, it doesn't bother me not to hear from my classmates or any of my professors, either. It is a part of the past that I do not want to rekindle.

To the OP; I know it is hard, but, keep your chin up. Sit in front of the class, especially during exam time, so that the instructors can see that you are not cheating. Hate to say it, but working at the job may be the same way, especially for a new grad, until they find the right mix of people to work with.