boy issues in nursing school

LeesG · Sep 30, 2009

Is he pressuring you in some way ? Your post sounds like your really stressed over it, thats why I asked.

If he is thats a diffrent issue...but if he just asked and that all...then just say NO...problem solved

Music in My Heart · Sep 30, 2009

Personally, I'd avoid starting a relationship during nursing school. They're both very demanding of your time and emotional energy and the margin for error in nursing school is pretty narrow.

I'd certainly not start dating somebody I was going to school with for precisely the reason that you identified... if it starts going downhill it's got the potential to create unnecessary stress in an situation that's got enough stress to begin with.

brokenroads27 · Sep 30, 2009

exactly! and no, hes not pressuring me at all. im just stressed from the whole situation, probably because im overthinking it. but i dont want to cause extra stress in my life. adding another person to my life could be a blessing, but like you said if it starts doing downhill, then what? i have to deal with this person for the next 2 years and thats frustrating. i dont want anything to be awkward when nursing school is difficult enough.

simply_viki · Sep 30, 2009

Sounds like you've got the right idea. You don't have to quit talking to the guy or anything, but let him know that you want to keep things on a professional level while in nursing school. You don't need to close the door completely on potential for the future, but I've seen major drama between classmates who decided to start going out while in school. You don't need that. And neither does he.

Kitty Hawk, ADN, RN · Sep 30, 2009

I think it depends on what you and he can/can't handle. This is what I saw in my class.

We had one "couple" in our class that met early on and by the end (graduation) they were also planning to marry. They kept mostly to themselves and were adorable in their devotion to another. She was young 20's maybe even 19 and he was mid-late twenties.

Of the 2 girls that were known to date other students and/or med students, they both failed out. But they made their antics known, even if you didn't know them, you knew...however our class for all the differences/ages were fairly tight.

We had a "playa" that tried his way around many of the girls. Although he was very smart and was in the military he was a trouble maker in class, he still graduated with honors so he was one that could balance both. One of the girls he dated felt very burned after, but she held her own, she was very sweet and kept focused on the goal.

Personally I think if you're not married, (and it better be strong before starting school) or in a rock solid (again strong beforehand). You're inviting trouble, school is stressful enough. My husband was my rock throughout, but he dealt with my nose in a book 95 percent of the time. We still had alone time and went out occassionaly, but it wasn't all that new "building" stuff that usually takes place when you're newly dating.

We had another girl that her husband left her 6 weeks into the progam b/c he was feeling neglected. :rolleyes: So many people can't handle their SO's attention being diverted. It tested many of the r'ships no doubt. I never worried about that but I'm really blessed for my husband to have my back no matter what. I feel bad for the classmates that had the additional stress of worrying over their r'ship and day to day stuff instead of having someone that took over to give them a break.

I understand both of you are in this, so at least there's the commaraderie, but I guess like I mentioned above, it'll depend on you two and what your dynamics are if it's a good idea or not. Good luck!

mom-n-nrse2b · Oct 1, 2009

My rule for myself is NO BOYS UNTIL I GRADUATE! In the program I am in, it's accelerated, so really, I have no time for the drama anyway. Aside from my daughter, school is my top priority. I have no desire to further complicate my life or risk my schooling. The girls around me, I tell them the same thing. Focus for now. It's a short committment and when you've graduated you can focus on a relationship then, if that is what you want. NO BOYS, NO BOYS, NO BOYS!!! I know it seems hard, but when you're finished I think you'll be glad you kept your focus and didn't add to your load. Can't you just be friends and study buddies or something and keep it platonic? Anyway, good luck, make the best decision for you and your EDUCATION, which in the end... isn't that why you're here?

SBJustBreathe, ASN, RN · Oct 1, 2009

I wouldn't do it. I'd tell him, "we'll talk after graduation...if you're still interested." Try to keep your distractions to a minimum.

anewday · Oct 1, 2009

Personally, I'd avoid starting a relationship during nursing school. They're both very demanding of your time and emotional energy and the margin for error in nursing school is pretty narrow.
I'd certainly not start dating somebody I was going to school with for precisely the reason that you identified... if it starts going downhill it's got the potential to create unnecessary stress in an situation that's got enough stress to begin with.

I agree with this post. Too much potential for drama and unnecessary stress if things don't work. Next thing you have to worry about is classmates getting all in your business. Things could get too messy. That doesn't mean you cant be friends with him though. You never know what might happen after graduation. The best relationships start from great friendships anyway. :cool:

That Guy, BSN, RN, EMT-B · Oct 1, 2009

Heck no. I'm the only guy in my class and no freaking way would I even consider asking any of the girls in my class. There are some great girls, attractive, fun, everything but the fact I see them every day all day and if something bad were to happen, wow that would be terrible. I already had an ex gf in 6/7 classes and that was hell in itself.

caliotter3 · Oct 1, 2009

I wouldn't do it. I'd tell him, "we'll talk after graduation...if you're still interested." Try to keep your distractions to a minimum.

This is the way to go. You are in school to get an education in nursing, not an easy task. Relationships can best be attended to after school is over.

locolorenzo22, BSN, RN · Oct 2, 2009

(from a guy perspective)...I thought to myself on the first day "wow, there's a lot of good looking girls in this class..." Found out that most were in relationships or they were married, or not looking for guys etc....

Spent about the first month trying to find a few single girls....but then i realized "hey, I'm gonna be here at least two years...do I really want to be on the outside?" Once I did that, a funny thing happened. I became much more respected and had many more positive interactions with my classmates. When I ran for class president, I heard from many of them that they would vote for me...and found out the vote went down section lines(we had 2...the other one had one more person, hence one more vote for the other)....to me, that showed that the respect was there.

it led me to finding many good friends, my beautiful finance, and two of my friends are going to be in our wedding....so I think school has to come first....