simply_viki

I had my first interview (ever) in November with the nurse recruiter in HR at a hospital after I showed up there with my resume (I'd previously applied online, but I decided to show up, too, since I've not had great results just applying online and it's been quite a while now since I graduated). I sent her a thank you card and as per her instructions, waited until January to follow up. She called me back two days ago and didn't seem to remember me, but called me back a second time a couple of minutes later and invited me to an interview today. Today's interview turned out to be with the director and the team leader of the NICU. They seemed to really like me, responded well to my answers and my questions, but when they asked about my long term goals and I said that I'd like to become a CNM someday, the director said that I was an excellent applicant, but that the Mother Baby unit might be a better fit with my goals. She then called the director of the Mother Baby unit to see if they could interview me also. They said yes, I just had to wait a bit for the director to get back from lunch, which was no problem and I thanked her and said I appreciated it. At Mother Baby, I met the team leader first, and she told me a bit about the unit and asked if I knew anything about the hospital (I said yes, I understood they're a not-for-profit and a teaching hospital, which is one of the reasons I'd love to work there). She was very nice and smiled a lot. The director arrived and we began the interview. It seemed to go... OK, but not as well as the first one, I think. They weren't sure if there's much of a career as a CNM and suggested I look into that, for one thing. They asked what I'd been doing since I finished nursing school, and I said I'd been working at my full time job I've had since before school while I look for a nursing job. Things seemed to be going reasonably well (although they did not necessarily look very impressed with me) until they gave me some scenario questions. Gulp. It's been quite a while since my obstetrical nursing class (I went through the part time track at my school, and graduated in April of 2011, so the OB class was actually in 2010 - IOW ancient history). I did my best, but... there was lots of stuff I forgot. I couldn't remember what a uterus is supposed to feel like after birth until after I left, for one thing. I think I correctly identified a possible clot in one scenario, but didn't remember the term DVT, and couldn't remember what to do about it, only that I should be careful not to dislodge it. In another scenario with a distracted mother on a cell phone while breastfeeding and a baby with blue lips (again, terms are escaping me - I can't remember what kind of cyanosis they said), I said I'd assess the baby's vital signs, but the interviewers prompted me to think about what could be causing the cyanosis while the baby is breastfeeding. I'd missed the fact that they said the baby was actually breastfeeding at the moment, but after they clarified that, I believe I correctly identified the problem was that the mother's large breast was obstructing the baby's nose and interfering with breathing, so said I would instruct the mother in repositioning the baby and teach the mother how to avoid that in the future. In another scenario, I couldn't remember either the term preeclampsia or that it leads to seizures (let alone what you do about it). After the director explained a bit about the scenario to me, I sort of laughed nervously and said that clearly I'm a bit rusty and need to read up on preeclampsia. I feel like I did really badly on the Mother Baby interview, and I think the NICU probably won't hire me even though they liked me because of my CNM goal (maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it). I'll send thank you cards and follow up, but I'm pretty bummed out about it now because that was the hospital I most wanted to work at. I can read up on obstetrical scenarios in case another position opens up someplace, but it seems like too little, too late at this point.

Small update - I got my first call back yesterday! I am spending this week buried in my textbooks to refresh my memory. I'm going in for training of some kind on Saturday; they'll let me know more when I call on Friday.

Okie dokie! That was one of my previous excuses. "Oh, y'know, they'll be closing up shop in HR by about 4pm, I bet, so maybe I should just wait until I can take a day off to really focus on driving around to all the different places..." Thanks for helping me kill my excuses!

Nope, I'm not on linked in, but you're the third person to mention it to me, so I think I'm going to get on it. I'd been wary of it because I don't really like the idea of mingling online profiles with business, but someone reassured me that it's completely seperate from facebook, etc. As to the assignment... Aye aye, captain! Should I call ahead, or just drop in? Also, I looked up LTACs in my area just now. It looks like none of them are actively hiring. Drop in with resumes anyway? Edited to add: Also, I get out of my current job at 3:30. Is that a bad time to start driving around to other places? I could take time off work if I have to, but I want to limit that (gotta keep the job I have until I've got another one!) as much as possible.

Thank you for all the comments, everybody! I really appreciate all the advice offered here (and the kicks in the pants! Those help, too.) BostonTerrierLoverRN - You've got a point there! Thank you for the words of encouragement. Niamah - Ooh, good tip. I hadn't thought of a summer camp, but it is the right time of year to start looking out for one. royhanosn - Hmm. I don't think I could do overseas, although I had looked into it briefly. Right now I'm pretty sure that would be just a way for me to waste time and money, because for one thing, I don't have a passport, and for another, the few places I did look into when I checked required a higher level of education than I have right now. "Sin clinics?" Wow, I wouldn't have thought of calling them that, but I have looked into drug rehabilitation and I did mention the abortion clinic. I am fully aware that people in difficult situations such as addiction and unwanted pregnancy need just as much, if not more, care and compassion than the rest of us. As for "the holidays," my family (yes, in North America) celebrates many holidays. I was referring to Thanksgiving, Chanukah, Christmas, and New Years, but it was shorter to just type the holidays. nursegirl62 - Thank you for the input from the other side! Do you recommend a call first, or just to show up one day in professional attire with resume in hand? It's interesting how differently that approach will come across to different people. Also I'm glad to know that you don't look on LTC as a negative point. I've been hearing about people feeling "stuck" in LTC, and that's kind of scary. (I don't think LTC is necessarily a bad place to be at all, I just don't like the idea of being "stuck" anywhere!) I've been working on polishing and repolishing my resume, but I hadn't thought of making separate ones for different jobs. That's a good idea, thanks! GrnTea - That is another angle I've been considering as well. I know I could be professional and kind to women in those situations, and I think I could find that fulfilling also. I'm not a fan of abortion (really, who is?) but I know I'm capable of offering compassionate care to women who feel that it is the right decision for them. I'll have to put some more thought into it, for sure. PMFB-RN - Heh, it's OK, I was a little baffled by that, too. Little random! FORDGRAD78 - Lackluster is exactly how I felt when I wrote my OP. Discouraged, inadequate, hopeless, and yes, as CrunchRN so astutely noted, a whole lot of procrastination mixed in! I came here for advice and a kick in the pants, and I've gotten both, and I appreciate both. As far as RNs working as CNAs or LPNs, my mom's first job after she got her RN license was working as an RN for a CNAs pay, and then later on when she moved to another state she accepted a CNA job in hopes of getting an RN job later on. So it does happen. Whether it's the best choice, I don't know. That's why I came here. merrywhiterose - Yeah, I may very well do that. Right now I'm working on getting myself out there and putting out the resumes and following up on contacts. If LTC is where I get hired, I'll take it. CrunchRN - It makes me grin that you caught on so quickly to exactly what my problem is. So no certification or volunteering at this time, you say? Heh, you've got a really good point - I could very well see myself using that as an excuse to table the job search for a while, and you're right, I can't afford to allow myself to do that. On with the job hunt it is. So far I think I'm doing pretty well taking action. Since my OP, I've: ~Gotten input from a career services advisor at my school on resume writing ~Had a friend online take a look at my resume and offer specific improvements ~Attended a job fair at my school (my first one!) ~Talked to one of my nursing professors, who is now calling me every time she hears of a potential opening ~Applied to one of those openings that my nursing professor pointed out So I'm getting on it! You were right - a kick in the butt was exactly what I needed. And I got it! Code_VSA - Wow, 18 months for someone with a BSN. Yikes! I'm glad she finally found something. Thank you for the words of encouragement. I'm going to keep looking. This thread has effectively booted me out of my "maybe I'll just give up" mode. frodo-dog - I don't think I mentioned what state I'm in. I live in FL. Guess I'm glad I don't live in AZ! I'm sorry your volunteer work didn't pan out. Based on that and what CrunchRn mentioned above, I think I'll table the volunteer idea for now. Thank you for your advice! Soontobehope - I hadn't thought of that at all, actually. I'll look into it. Thanks! I think maybe one of the companies that was at the job fair I went to was something like that. I'll take a look at their brochure and follow up on the resume I gave them. macgirl - I'm not sure if it applies or not, actually! But you're right, reading about how hard it is to find a job is making me desperate and crazy (hence the thread). Simply Hired, you say? I'll look it up now. I haven't been sure what websites to use, so I've been mainly applying directly to hospitals and such that I can think of off the top of my head or through a Google maps search of my area. I have looked into state jobs and the military, but the jobs with the state (veterans hospital) closed with no call backs, and the military requires a BSN. Plus I really, really don't want to work in the military. I hate the idea of my entire body belonging to another entity. I considered it, though, out of desperation. I must say I was a little relieved that they wouldn't take me anyway. Thanks for your input, though, especially that Simply Hired site. I'll definitely take a look at that. camoflower - Heh, if I had kids that might work, but being a 20-something with no kids, I'm afraid a picture of myself might be points against me rather than points for me. I'm sorry you got fired over politics! What a bummer. Glad it worked out in the end though. So you're recommending pool positions, is that basically what you're saying? Honestly I'd rather not try and avoid general orientation, ideally I'd have the longest and most intensive orientation ever! Refreshing my memory would be a great thing. However I understand that it's a big investment for hospitals. Nope, not working yet, but I'm working on finding work!

AndiSN, thanks for your input, and best of luck with your pregnancy and job hunting! YES, if you have information on the abortion clinic thing, I would be interested. That was actually sort of a half-baked concern in my head, and was pretty much the only reason I mentioned what kind of clinic it was (I guess I should've spelled it out). If it is going to be a scarlet letter spelling doom on any sort of career in OB, I would like to know. A PM would be great! I really appreciate it.

Wow, so many replies while I was out! Thank you all for your input, I appreciate your taking the time. Yesterday I made a phone call to my school to find out if they had any resume help services available, and I found out that they were holding a job fair that day. The kind lady in career services gave me an overview of things to make sure I have on my resume, told me to polish it up, and get over there. I went out and bought a jacket, spiffied up my resume, and hightailed it over there. I'd never been to a job fair, but it was kind of fun. Much less nerve-wracking than I'd anticipated. I gave my resume to a bunch of places, and got a bunch of business cards and flyers. So hopefully that goes somewhere. Now to replying more individually. somedaypeds - Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and do the volunteering, and I'll put in the application at the nursing home by my apartment. I don't have a portfolio, and I'm not sure how I would make one or what I would put into it, and if it would even be very useful... is that a standard thing? I haven't seen it recommended much. In nursing school, we only had to turn in one resume and cover letter in leadership, and it was basically just checked off as "done", we didn't get a grade for it or feedback on it. Thanks for the good luck wishes! calliotter3 - Oh, yes. Once I get into the BSN program, I will be making much more effort to maintain positive contacts with my professors and any nurses I meet. Lesson learned! Jammin' RN - Aww, thank you for deciding to make an account to comment on my thread. That's really sweet. It's good to hear (well, comforting anyway, I don't think "good" is quite the right word) that there are others who have similar situations. As far as my resume and cover letters, I'm going to check out the career services department that they have at my school and see what help they offer for those things. Maybe they even know of a company who does that professionally. And on the positive self talk, yeah, I've really got to start doing that. I'm much better at negative self talk! ANA, you say? They told us that in nursing school, but I didn't feel like I could afford it (well, I guess technically I can't, but hey, I can put it on my credit card!). I guess I'll look into that. "Love to constantly be learning," yeah I guess that does sound like a strength, and it's definitely true. If I could stay in school forever, I'd be a happy camper! Thank you for all your words of encouragement. LindseyRN86 - Wow, I'm sorry you got laid off, that's scary! I'll keep my fingers crossed you find a job soon. I hope we both find something soon! Streamline2010 - Hmm. So it seems to be different in different states. I live in FL. I guess I'll ask around. Worst that can happen is they tell me no, right? And I'd be willing to swallow the pill of CNS or LPN pay if it gets me the experience. GitanoRN - I'm not sure what you mean. How do you shadow a nurse if you're not a student or orientee? Thanks for the wishes of good luck. BostonTerrierLoverRn - I'll keep it in mind, but I'm not sure how acceptable it would be to just show up to different floors. I worry I'd make an impression that I don't know how to respect boundaries or something. It's too bad I didn't have my butt in gear when I was finishing up nursing school, I could've given my resume to the nurse manager in the ER where I did leadership nursing clinicals... It's probably been too long now, plus I'm embarrassed to admit that I can't remember her name, although I do remember what she looks like. dirtyhippiegirl - I like your username, it sounds like me! I do have friends from nursing school, but I'm embarrassed to talk to them and admit that after all this time I haven't found a job yet. There were about half a dozen of us who studied together sometimes and tended to flock together, and every last one of them besides me found a job. I know I need to just get over it. One in particular I know I can call. I'm just going to get over it. LTAC? I just googled that. Hmm. I haven't heard of any, but I'll do some internet searching to see what I find. And as far as the clinic, that's a good idea. I'll ask about volunteer work, too. mell260 - Yeah that was kind of my concern, too. canchaser - OK, rehab and LTAC. Got it, I'll look for those. I will make more an effort to reconnect with my classmates. I kind of faded away when they all got jobs and I didn't, and I didn't think that any of them would be able to help me anyway because they'd still be newbies and wouldn't have much sway, but I guess it could help. It's better than just blindly shooting internet applications every which way, at any rate! kgarfield2000 - Wow, that sounds like a crappy situation you were in, I'm glad you were able to find a job in the end! There was a home health company at the job fair, I'll try and follow up on that asap. I did give them my resume, so... Here's hoping! Oh! And craigslist? Really? Hmm, I hadn't even thought of that, I kind of dismissed craigslist in my mind as a job lead because it seems like a scamfest, but I have noticed that I haven't seen listings anywhere else for doctor's offices, and I was looking for doctor offices, so I'll check it out. Merlyn - Thanks for the encouragement! I'll keep at it. I do have a license, but it could be taken away if I don't get on the ball and find something before it expires! So I've gotta get on it. (Well, I'm on it; I've taken action since starting this thread, but you know what I mean. Keep at it and whatnot.) Greenkj - Aww, you registered for me, too? I feel kinda warm and fuzzy now. As far as my resume, well... It's pretty bare bones. I listed my clinical sites under clinical experience, but I don't think I would have space on the page to list skills I did in each site. Isn't it all supposed to be on one page? In OB, though, eh... I loved the lecture, but the clinicals weren't all that great. Our instructor was a bit (A LOT) disorganized, and we wasted a lot of time in our very short rotation. I did get to see a few cool things, though (I got to watch a c-section! That was cool). We weren't allowed IN the op room, though, so I think that hardly counts for anything. So I saw it. Big whoop. And as far as feedback that makes me a great OB nurse, I don't really have any. Well, I have my friend who always tells me I'm going to be a good nurse, and she would always call me for advice when she was pregnant, but I'm pretty sure she just tells me I'm going to be a good nurse because she's my friend. But yes, I'm taking other classes. I just got my ACLS. I haven't decided what to take next, I'm trying to find out where in my area I can take something like NRP or fetal heart monitoring. It doesn't seem to be listed in my school's continuing ed classes. Tinkerbell04 - Wow, two days in a month. That's scary! But at least it's something, I guess. I've been hesitant to apply for on call positions because I have a full time job (not even remotely medical related) with benefits and even though it doesn't pay much at all, I can't afford to risk losing it to something unreliable like on call or PRN or whatever. I'm even hesitant about part time, but I could probably afford to live on part time nursing pay (it'd be pretty close to what I'm already making, if they paid my what's listed as "entry level" RN salary on some websites I've seen). Good luck in your job hunt! PFMB-RN - Oh darn. That's a bummer. I'll keep looking, I hope I find something soon. I mean, I haven't been unemployed, I just haven't found a nursing job yet. If nothing else, though, working on my BSN will help me make those connections I didn't make during my RN program. BostonTerrierLoverRN - I know some schools do, but fortunately mine doesn't. Vick13 - I could try that. I'm just very scared of making a worse impression by doing that. Phone calls in general already make me nervous, even to people I know. And calling a nurse manager? He/she will be very busy! I feel like, "who am I to be calling this person and bothering them at work?" Y'know? Maybe I'm overthinking it. I'll definitely take a night shift job, I'll maybe take a PRN job... (see what I wrote to Tinkerbell04 about PRN though - that scares the crap out of me!) and I'll definitely be willing to push a med cart at a long term care facility. I'll talk to nurses if I meet any, but I don't meet many, because I work in an office at a school. I'm thinking about just hanging out at my nursing school... maybe I can offer to help my old professor with organizing her office or something so she sees my face regularly. I was so humbled and flattered to realize that she remembered me and offered to help me when I ran into her last week while I was on campus to get a book for my ACLS class. I need to make the effort to maintain that connection, huh? smartnurse1982 - Yes! That is exactly what I'm afraid of. I sometimes help out a coworker in my office with the hiring papers for applicants to our department, and I know that when people call us to follow up on their application, it's just annoying and we can't do anything for them, and it doesn't make any kind of good impression. It's even worse if they just show up. I can't imagine it's that much different just because it's a different field.

Thank you! I hadn't thought of that; that's a really good idea. I'll look into that.

Erm... I'm also a big fan of the women's health part of OB, which in my own personal moral code, includes women's choice.

LOL. HouTx, yes, you're spot on. I am a procrastinator, and it's BAD, and it's WORSE since it's already been a long time. So now what? ETA: I knew I was a big time procrastinator in nursing school, but at least in nursing school there were rock solid, immovable deadlines that I absolutely couldn't get around, so even if I did put something off til the very end, at least I ended up getting it done. I'm still rather shocked I managed to drag my procrastinating butt all the way through with A's and B's, despite the last minute cramming. This job hunting is another matter entirely. The timing is all up to me! That's just... awful.

Debunker - Thanks, I'll keep an eye out for open houses. Maybe my professor has heard of some. I'll ask her. Ashley - You're right, I didn't mean I'd been looking for a year, I only meant I've ben out of school for a year, which I think is major points against me. As far as the volunteer work, do you think it will look good no matter what I volunteer to do in a hospital (i.e., what if all they've got available is kitchen work or delivering newspapers to patients?) or should I look for something more specific? Thanks for the tip on liability issues with LPN and CNA work as an RN. I kind of thought it was probably something like that, but I wasn't sure. Maybe I could ask my BON...? Would they know?

Thank you for the input, CrunchRN, I really do appreciate it. I'll see if my professor is willing to take a look at my resume and cover letters. As to showing up in person, do you think that will be redundant if I show up at the places I've applied to already? I can show up in person to the nursing home by my house and the abortion clinic with a resume and cover letter in hand; they don't have online application systems in place anyway, so I haven't yet applied.

Hi all. I've made just about every mistake in job hunting that I've seen mentioned - I didn't do a good job networking in school, I didn't join any student organizations or do anything "above and beyond" in volunteer work or anything like that, I didn't work as a CNA or patient care tech or anything healthcare related prior to or during nursing school, and I let too much time pass by before starting to really look for a job. I'm now starting to wonder if it's even worth it to bother. I finished my ADN program in February 2011. The graduation was in April 2011, so we weren't eligible to sit for boards until after April. The boards lost my application, and I didn't realize it because I was waiting patiently for the 6-8 weeks to pass by before calling to pester them about it. End result of that, plus a little procrastination to boot, I didn't sit for boards until September 2011. I passed my NCLEX first try, the computer shut off after 75 questions, so I know I did well despite the passing of time since school, but I'm sure on my resume it probably looks like I tried several times before passing NCLEX, due to the length of time between graduation and testing. After getting my license, I applied to a few positions at a local hospital, and then tabled the job search temporarily while I did some traveling over the holidays to visit family. I missed everybody... my immediate family moved away during nursing school, and I hadn't seen them in a while. I returned home from the holidays in January, but I felt so apprehensive and anxious about the prospect of job hunting that I didn't begin in earnest until a few weeks ago. I've been reading about job hunting practically the whole time, and trying to polish my resume and cover letters (both of which I think suck, to be honest), but I just don't feel like there's any hope. Ideally, I'd love to get into OB and/or women's health, but I'll take anything. I just don't see anything happening. I don't feel like I have any strengths to play up in a job interview, assuming I get that far (well, I'm good at school. That's a strength, but what employer cares if I'm good at school? Nobody, that's who). I got back in contact with a nursing professor of mine, who pointed me in the direction of a couple of hospitals who she'd heard were hiring new nurses. I applied for both, but haven't heard anything back, despite leaving messages with both HR departments and speaking to one nursing recruiter (who took one look at my application and told me "good luck", which I don't take as a good sign at all). I'm planning on starting my BSN, which I guess will put me back at "fresh new grad" status, which is better than "rusty new grad" status, but I'm not sure what to do in the meantime. So far I've applied to every hospital in the area and a few out of the area, the corrections facilities, the VA hospitals, and my next try is going to be nursing homes and possibly an abortion clinic (which I think might work well with my OB/women's health goals... I hope). SO... If you read all this, you've got my appreciation, and if you've got any encouragement, I'll be grateful. I'll take some hard realism if that's all you've got, but I think I'm already pretty realistic/leaning towards pessimistic about this whole job hunt thing. Any other perspectives? Tips? Comments? ETA: Oh, also I was thinking about doing some volunteer work in a hospital. Is that too little, too late at this point, or might it actually help? What about applying to CNA or LPN positions (I don't have those licenses, but does my RN supercede that?) or something like that? Is that an option?

Thanks for the replies, you guys. Missy77 - I hadn't heard of Summer Externships until you just mentioned it. I did a quick Google search on it, though, and it looks like most places in my area are just looking for BSN grads, not ADN. Boo. Boog'sGirl724 - Thanks. I also spoke to a former classmate of mine who started the program with me, but switched to full-time about halfway through and has since gotten her RN and was lucky enough to land a job in ER as a new grad! She reassured me that she felt the same way, it's normal. Whew. I guess that helps, a little. I definitely agree on the disservice thing... at this point, I was starting to worry they were never going to actually teach us at all. It was in clinical orientation that I piped up that we hadn't learned to do IV insertions, and that's when they decided to take the whole group over there to do a quick run-through. So... yeah. I'm going to call the lab manager to ask her what their hours are. Most of the campus is closed by about 4:30, except the library and tutoring center (which unfortunately does not include a lab)... and I get out of work at 4:30. If it's open in the evenings, I'll definitely go at least once. I've been trying to use the evenings for practice NCLEX questions we have to turn in each week, but I think I can just do double the questions another night or something. rdsxfnrn - you sure aren't kidding!

I do well in school. I test well, consistently. The whole brain-dump after tests, though? Yeah. Making it worse is the fact that I'm in the part time program at my school, so there are many things that I haven't encountered in clinicals yet... and it may have been two years since I learned about it! Low moment in clinicals yesterday in the ER: A patient came in, 18 y/o male, complaining of abdominal pain. When asked where it was and how bad it was, he pointed to the epigastric area and said it was 5/10. I had hooked him up to the monitor and had just gotten out my stethoscope when the nurse came in and took over (poor lady must have been so sick of me by this point... I'd utterly failed at a Foley insertion earlier and kept on asking questions). Turned out his pain was actually in the lower right quadrant, was worse when she had him bend his knee and applied pressure to his foot, and was tender to palpation. As we headed towards the nursing station, she asked me what I thought he might have, specifically as a male patient. I was stumped. "Uh... maybe a hernia?" She just looked at me, and then started having me recite the parts of the intestinal tract. "Let's see... duodenum, jejunum, ileum... colon..." She stopped me, and asked what I was missing. Can you believe I completely blanked out on THE APPENDIX???:smackingf That's a perfect example of the huge gap between my learning and the actual experience, though. GI was taught in Summer 2009. I haven't had a single appendicitis case in all my clinicals. Oh, I could tell you all about pancreatitis and cholecystitis... that was just last semester, and I've actually had a few of those cases in clinicals. But I sure didn't luck out on appendicitis. And then there's skills. Oh gosh. Take the Foley, for example. I did that maybe a total of 3 times in lab, including when I was tested. As part time students, we don't have access to the lab other than during scheduled class time (it's closed during the evening when we're not at work), so that was all I had the chance to do. And the opportunity never presented itself in clinicals. A couple of times I had a patient who already had a Foley... but no patient who needed one inserted until yesterday. And boy, that was a FAIL. I drew a blank right from the moment I opened the sterile package, couldn't remember what anything was for... the nurse had to prompt me along all the way through it. The iodine swabbing stuff was different in that kit than in the kits we had in lab - in lab we had cotton swabs in a packet of iodine. This kit had an iodine packet you squirted onto a bunch of cotton balls and it came with a little set of tongs (calipers?) to pick up the cotton balls with. I started out holding the tongs upside down, first of all, and kept getting the cotton balls stuck on my gloves (who knew iodine on cotton was soooo sticky?!). The nurse told me to forget the tongs and just pick up the cotton balls with my hands, so I did... and then I forgot (I don't even want to admit this, really) the whole "front-to-back thing. No kidding. I can remember that in a test, but apparently in person it just flees my mind. The nurse still didn't give up on me, though, and just reminded me to wipe front to back, so I did. I kept having trouble with the sticky cotton balls. Finally, I couldn't find the patient's urethra. Try as I might to get in there with my fingers, spread it apart and look, I couldn't see anything but labia, the patient's legs kept contracting close together no matter what we said, and I know I broke sterility a few times trying to keep her legs out of the way. I mean, I know where the urethra is in relation to the privy parts and lady parts, but if I can't see either, what am I supposed to do? Finally, the nurse took over and did it herself. I just wanted to find a good hole in the ground somewhere and bury myself in it. And those are just a couple of examples. Oh, and my school didn't teach us how to insert IVs until this semester, and I got to try it ONCE, but messed it up that time, too. And we hadn't been warned that we'd be practicing that in lab, otherwise I would've read about it and probably would've done better. We're all expected to successfully insert an IV in addition to a few other personally identified objectives (mine include inserting a Foley... so I'd better get better at that fast) by the end of the semester. Then we graduate! Turned loose into the world of nursing with barely a handle on basic skills. I feel so inept at everything that I sometimes wonder if there's any way I can just take the whole program over again, even though I have A's and B's in every single class. I kind of feel like it would be unethical of me to even attempt to practice as a real nurse, but I don't know how I'll learn if I'm not actually in the field and I don't really know what options I have. Can A and B students request remediation? Would I be laughed off the block? Is that even likely to help? I'm at the end of the program and I'm just sort of panicking that I'm going to be a horrendous nurse.