Funny, I don't remember ...

[AmyB]

Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered:

1 I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2 My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.

3 I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.

4 Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

5 Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

6 All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

7 If all is not lost, where is it?

8 It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

9 Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

10. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

11. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few...

12. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

13. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

14. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

15 It's hard to make a come back when you haven't been anywhere.

16. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.

17. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

18. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

19. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

20. It's not hard to meet expenses... they're everywhere.

21. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

22. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter.. I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.

23. I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU OR NOT!

24. Funny, I don't remember being . . . . . absent minded...

[Mister Chris, MSN, NP]

Thank you for reminding me to not allow myself to forget - so I do lists, I do lists every day - for the next day but sometimes cannot remember where I put the list or forget to date the list - and then when I find it I cannot remember if I was to tick or cross out anything because it must have been a list for several days ago so I think then I should go over the whole list again in case I didn't do any of the items, and then if I do them I should now make a list to remind me that I have already done those things so if I find the last list I will then save time as I will not have to check what was on the list, I think, ah! I have just found another list............................ Dah! Umm!

Spent too long in the psychogeriatric ward again?

[Titiana]

13. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

Don't I know it. LOL

[jnette, ASN, EMT-I]

Cute ! Good one.