Hey nurses,

I know I'm a general nursing student but I wanted to post this on your page because I need a response from you guys. Basically, I'm 20 years old and I'm on clinical rotation at the moment. A few days ago one of the patients I was caring for was really sick. The patient had to have an NG tube inserted and was so scared. I'd never seen it done before on a real patient. Afterwards me and the nurse I was working with gave her a bed bath. On the outside I looked cool and collected. But on the inside I was so shook up. I'd never seen someone so scared and ill and in pain. I just wanted to make everything better but I knew I couldnt. And I wanted to do was cry but I couldn't. The nurse I was working alongside was great, she gave the patient support and encouragement. And she didnt seem one bit emotional where as I felt a little helpless. It just came so naturally to her and she didnt appear to be effected by it at all. Does it come with age? or experience? Like although I act professional and I feel im competent at the level I'm at, sometimes I feel like a kid! Do I need to grow a ''thicker skin'' and how does one even do that? I just want to be the best nurse I can be.

Thanks for reading!

You will get used to this stuff with time and experience. I still get shaken up by scared, sick, in pain patients, but it doesn't hit me til afterward. While I'm the nurse and dealing with the situation, I go on autopilot and know that I need to get done what needs to be done for the pt's survival. Believe me, you will get used to it with time:)

It really does come with time and experience. I would worry way more about you if you were at this point in your career and totally unaffected and cool.

Yes, it does come with time and experience.

Time and experience. I worked in allergy for 4 1/2 years and would still get nervous when someone would start going into anaphylaxis on me. I'd get the epi and nebulizer and we'd begin the whole process (we had it down pat) and after it was over I'd let the internal shaking begin. You just cope, put yourself in the moment and do what needs doing, and decompress later. Get the patient safe first. That adrenalin kick comes in handy!

You already have a good start, calm and collected on the outside, only shaking on the inside. Happens to a lot of us, not so frequently after a while but there are still those few that get to you.

Your nurse showed you how to give comfort and encouragement, but you never know how it affected her internally. Me, I'm an old crusty bat; not much gets through anymore :) but to say I never react or feel shaken up would be a lie. What you are asking for is coping skills, and it really does come with time and experience.

I am a new nurse on a surgical floor. i still cringe, and at times get a little teary eyed when I have to roll someone over on a broken hip and they are screaming bloody murder in pain, or when our cancer patients are puking non stop from the chemo and crying out asking me when its going to stop. however, I try not to let it show to the patients. I try to comfort them, and I try to make them feel like they are in good hands and I am doing everything I can to keep them comfortable and get them better (Because I AM!). Time will help you become better at masking your emotions in front of patients. It is good that you feel for them though, that will make you an excellent nurse, empathy is a very valuable thing to have.

Some things will affect you more and others won't - I think a lot of it is how you connect with the patient. Some wounds I see I am shocked at and others I can just clean and be fine with it. I have had a few deaths, and I have only cried after work about one of them (because I knew the patient well). NG tubes are uncomfortable, it isn't just that patient.

I'm learning that part of being a nurse is seeing these things and knowing what to do and helping them. For example, if the patient is in pain, can you give them a PRN pain pill? Massage their hands or feet? Rub their back? Reposition them? Get them up into their chair? Get them a snack? It is thinking about the whole picture and what you can do to help. If you are in clinical, you might not feel comfortable approaching the nurse and asking "do you think we should give her a pain pill?" But you could say, "Have you had this patient before? What do you usually do when she is having pain?" Or you can do those non-pharmacological interventions on your own. Sometimes, just taking a moment to sit and take the patient's hand and tell them that they're doing great will make a huge difference.

The more you hurt people, the more you get used to it. Honestly, it sounds barbaric but it is the truth. NGs hurt and they suck. Foleys suck. Needles to a rather large population, hurt.

I agree with That Guy and, also, the more you do and the longer you work in the field, the less shocked/emotional you get by things.

For example, last week a colleague told me that her friend's baby was born with a Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia. Today she told me that things weren't looking good and that there was a slim chance that the baby had severe brain damage and a large chance that the baby was brain dead. My reaction to that was a matter-of-fact nursing question: "did the baby stroke or did he respiratory arrest?" A bad outcome for a baby with a disease this serious doesn't shock me. I have been working in pediatrics for my entire nursing career which has left me a little jaded.

it comes with experience. Older nurses without experience react the same way as younger nurses from my observations. Eventually, you wikl become desensitized and jaded. A wonderful coping mechanism at times. However, it can be alienating outside of your job.