sb22

Martha Stewart had a hilarious April Fools show. I just happened to be flipping through the channels and she was lying on the floor so I had to watch. She tricked me by talking about these giant pears and then she glittered a chair. It was so funny my diet pepsi came out of my nose. I have to admit for everything people have said about her, she can laugh at herself really well.

This is one got from someone on this board a long time ago. "Don't sweat the petty stuff and don't pet the sweaty stuff."

I work in a n ofice with 4 male MD's and a male practice administrator. They have their own bathroom. A couple of us put saran wrap on their toilet. Well...the admin figured it out and acted very mad. He made us stop our lunch to go clean up "his mess". Turned out to be Mountain Dew and a Baby Ruth candy bar. You can't imagine the looks on our faces as we each realized that the pranksters had been pranked.

Gross! :imbar

I work in an ENT office where we see a lot of neck masses that require surgery and reconstruction. One of our doctor's tells about a man who had surgery with a trache and some reconstruction. He used part of the pectoral muscle. Two funny things: The patient came in for his 3 month check and had grown 1 hair in his throat that apparently tickled. The patient had tattooed under each man boob "HOT" and "COLD". The doc had to cut the "C" off the cold for the harvest site. So he was really upset with the doc that he now had "HOT and "OLD". Of course all of the nurses agreed that it's not a bad thing to be hot and old.

Took me a minute to figure out what you were talking about. I thought that was against the law!

I just have to comment so this gets back to the top. My husband actually did #1 --he said people got up and came to his cubical to see if he was on the phone!

My husband is a youth pastor and one day he was doing a lesson from Genesis where it talks about Adam and Eve were embarrassed about being naked and sewed fig leaves together to make clothing. One of the boys in the group was reading the verse aloud and said, "They were naked so they s@rewed". He lost the lesson at that point, but learned a valuable lesson himself on having people read aloud.

OH MAN!! I love it!

What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you breathe through that little thing?

"Sausage Girl" for a med records person who wears her clothes way too tight. One day she was wearing a tight pink blouse and she looked like a vienna sausage.

I get these kinds of responses all the time. A lady told me today that she was allergic to ibuprofen b/c she had had a gastric bypass.

Turkey Talk A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey. "But I just haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a week, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree. Moral of the story: Bull crap might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Turkey Talk A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey. "But I just haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a week, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree. Moral of the story: Bull crap might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Background info: We have three wonderful foster kids who are hispanic. They spoke primarily spanish when they came to live with us (I spoke no spanish but was making an effort to learn). Situation: I was working in the kitchen one afternoon and a little "air biscuit" popped out. I said, "Escuche!" thinking that it meant "excuse me" instead it means "Listen up!" The kids started dying laughing and my husband, between gasps for air explained to me what I had actually said. Three years later I am trying to live this down.

That was great!! I'm sending this to friends and family right now!

Hi! I graduated from Midway with my ADN in 1995. Nursing school is tough but get to know your classmates and study together. I started as a CNA at a nursing home, (because they paid for my training) but the pay was the same as being a cashier at Rite Aid at the time. I recommend that you go to a nursing school that will adequately prepare you for the "real world". My class had a 100% pass rate of the NCLEX! I have worked with nurses that barely had an understanding of anatomy let alone physiology and that scares me. You have to make the decisions that are best for you and your family, but remember also that nursing will not be easy and you should be as prepared as you can be for yourself and your patients. Good Luck!

If you choke a Smurf, what color does he turn?

That's a shame! There is nothing wrong with teasing as long as you are not cutting people down. I say keep smiling and they will either get over it or die miserable.

I am really impressed that you are able to come up with a new strip everyday. I have a bit of creativity but don't think I could ever have the stamina to do something like a comic strip. Keep up the good work!

I work in an office and a male patient who had been in the waiting room entirely too long (and had let everyone else know how long he'd had to wait) was next to be called back. I went to the door and called his name and said "Let's go get a room.":eek: He said something about waiting so long that he didn't want to lose his spot now. It certainly lightened the mood in the waiting room though.

Cute! A hamster with a little attitude. I like it.

I am currently working in an ENT office and see this frequently. Usually it is something viral that goes away but can be related to more permanent hearing loss (Meniere's disease). I would have him see an ENT. Good luck! Sandy

I agree-have someone review your notes-as nurses we tend to do the care but not take credit, with someone else looking at your note they can offer suggestions. Just remember that in home health you are assessing the patient for the whole time since they were seen last by someone in your discipline. (If SN sees the patient once a week, you have to assess for the past week, etc.) Also, you must make each note make a complete picture of the patient with every visit, so there will be repitition from note to note. A note must be a ble to "stand alone". If an auditor only pulled one note from the chart, they must be able to tell all about that patients condition based on your one note. Hopefully your agency has a check list for the head to toe assessment and you can just chart on the things that are not "normal".

There are a few anemia diagnoses that will allow for b12 injections. Are you doing home health now? If so, there is a guide called the conditions of participation that specifically tell you what diagnoses and how often it can be administered. V codes will be optional (they should be helpful) I think it will allow more flexibility for the primary diagnosis.