good and funny comebacks?!!

[loveNurse12]

ok so i have this "friend" who always brings up the topic about nurses. and always asks me "don't nurses clean up poeple's asses", "don't they clean ****", "isn't nursing a disgusting job to have". i want to have good comebacks and throw it on her face next time she says it. i need something to say to her to make her regret saying these staff about nurses. i mean nurses saves life, people needs nurses and so on, but she clearly wouldn't understand that language so i want to know good comebacks.

[Purple_roses]

All I ever say is, "Yep, they do," matter of factly. It's not fun for them to tease you when you acknowledge that you are aware and ok with that being part of the job.

[llg, PhD, RN]

Getting you all riled up and working on a snappy comeback is what this "friend" wants. Don't give her the satisfaction.

If you feel the need, maybe you can say something like ... "Yes, they do. We do whatever the patients need -- clean them, comfort them, save their lives ... whatever ..." and shrug it off. Just don't get all riled up about it. That's what she wants. If you get all rile up, she wins.

Personally, if it were me ... I would be distancing myself from this person. She is clearly not a real friend. I might also be tempted to ask her seriously (in front of other people) why she feels the need to denigrate such an honorable profession. Does her self-esteem need to be boosted? I'd ask her such things in a way that would make her feel "defective" in front of other people -- and she would soon learn not to mess with me.

[cracklingkraken, ASN, RN]

Who cares what she thinks? It just shows her own ignorance and reflects poorly on her, in my opinion. I hope she's not going into healthcare with that mentality. Clearly, you need a new friend.

[nlitened]

First of all, this isn't a friend. But you should take the high road and ignore it....and maybe stop interacting with this person.

[SopranoKris, MSN, RN, NP]

I would say something like "yes, we have to care for our patients during some of the worst times in their lives. When I have to do this it's because my patient isn't able to do it himself/herself. If you were critically ill, wouldn't you want the best care possible?"

BTW, people never have a problem when babies have poopy diapers, but God forbid, it happens to an adult Being matter of fact usually stops the "ewwws"

[ponymom]

Just coyly ask her something along the lines of "why are you asking, are you trying to be silly? What do you think about the kind of duties nurses do?" But, give her an almost imperceptible smirk first. Make sure you slightly tilt your head just-so, too. If she's got the brains of a rock, she should understand your message.

She sounds likes a first-grader.

[oklamedic2011]

I just listen to what they say, then ask them to hold my bags of money I made "wiping asses"

[missmollie, ADN, BSN, RN]

If you need to come up with a snippy response, this isn't a person you need in your life. I would probably ask them "You seem really concerned about a minor part of my job. Why is that?"

They will either shut up immediately, or continue to ask questions. If the questions continue, I'd answer them calmly and call them out on their behavior. Most people don't like that. "You continue to word your questions so they seem insulting. I would never be so outright rude to you, the way you are being rude to me." Then I would probably turn around and walk away.

You don't have to take this, you are making a choice to listen and be offended by their words. Don't allow them that power.