Funerals...is it appropriate to go..........

My mother died of Hodgkin's Disease when I was a child. She'd had it all my life and was a regular at the local oncology unit. Several of her nurses came to her wake. I'm 47 and I've never forgotten it. As a result I have often gone to visitations when a patient died. I've always found it appreciated.

i have attended funerals and found family members appreciate the thoughtfulness.

MORE than appropriate. Remember, funerals are REALLY for those who survive the deceased. It is NEVER inappropriate to attend an affair commemorating the life of someone who mattered to you...and you to them. Go---it may be therapeutic for you and certainly will convey respect to those this patient left behind! You are very kind to do this.

When I worked at the LTC facility, a group of the admin staff would almost always go to visitation, because we knew the resident and family. We were always greeted with appreciation.

When my son died, one of his nurses came to his funeral. It was nice to have her there, it ment that David was more to her than "just another patient".

I work in an inpatient oncology unit and previously on our palliative care unit. I've attended many funerals and visitations for those patients I've bonded well with and never had a bad experience. Without exception the families have been very happy I've come and usually drag me around to introduce to all of the people in attendance. I find that for myself it gives a good sense of closures, particularly if I wasn't in attendance when the pt passed away.

I have gone and wept at funerals............do what you feel is right

Karen

I have attended funerals/visitations before. I don't see anything wrong with it. When I worked in SICU there was several occasions when a pt. had been with us for a long time that the family would call us and tell us the funeral arrangements and ask for us to pass it on to all the staff so they can attend if the would like. When I worked LTC I had gotten close to several residents. I remember one in particular that was really hard for me....her son came to see us before the funeral and to clean out her things, he seen that myself and a co worker were having a hard time with his mothers death and he gave both of us one of here dolls that she had collected. It was very therapuetic for us and him!!

Went to the calling hrs and it was very nice. When the husband saw me, he started to cry and hugged me and thanked me for coming. He also told me that just before his wife passed, she was asking for me to help her. I think it made him feel a little better when he saw me. Thanks for all your input. Would I do it again...........I would have to say yes.

thanks again

Niteshiftnurse, I'm glad you found it rewarding and comforting.

yes,i have gone to wakes to pay my condolences--the families are always appreciative--our visiting hours are all day so you get to know the family members too--some pts/families seem to "get" to you more and even tho you knew they suffered you were sad to see them go