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Discussion

You will all probably hate me for this

...But I just have to say:

So many of you are amazing people and nurses. The time you put in responding to posts on Allnurses really does make a difference.

BUT.

When people come here asking for advice on a situation, they are not looking for your opinion of them as a person or their behavior. You all know what threads I'm talking about.

It's one thing to point out that their behavior could potentially be dangerous to patients.

It's one thing to be honest and tell them that their future doesn't look too bright.

It's one thing to suggest they may find seeing a therapist very helpful.

It's another to tell them they are mentally ill, mock them RELENTLESSLY, or judge them. When you do this to your fellow nurses (that have just come to you for advice), you're worse than that poor, scared soul you FLAMED for thinking a drug abuser may have a bloodborne illness.

These posters are often simply desperate, scared, or just plain curious!

I know it's important to have a thick skin when you work in healthcare, and I sure as heck am not busting out the trigger-words bully” or NETY.” It's just that even in my CNA class, it was emphasized over and over that it's not our place to judge patients. Can't you afford the same courtesy to other nurses?

I'm generally a pretty quiet person, but I believe in standing up for other people. So I just had to put this out there.

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    • Featured Replies

    People should still use common courtesy and politeness. There is no excuse for rudeness (which includes any posts via social media). I understand that people want to justify being rude to certain posters and tell them to grow thick skin and what not. Whatever the situation is, no one deserves to be treated or disrepected by anyone. There is no reason that we as adults can't treat each other with respect. Honestly, what I have found true for ALL social media is that those who post such hateful and negative comments do so and its an excuse for passive aggressive people to act in that manner and feel ok with themselves about the way they treat others.

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    The internet is not a support group.

    Exactly. Some situations are just things no one should ever get involved in, much less professionals or aspiring professionals. People can recover from bad choices and move on, sure, but don't expect us to tell you bad choices are great. And some choices have longer lasting consequences than you may realize, and we're not hating on you when we tell you that. We're not even hating when we tell you something you're doing is utterly morally wrong.

    Even if the entirety of the membership disagrees with me, I'm going to tell you you're wrong if I think you are. That hasn't been banned yet. And if you get upset, well, I didn't barge into your living room and impose myself upon you, you asked for my opinion.

    Same rules apply to me when I post something.

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    People should still use common courtesy and politeness. There is no excuse for rudeness (which includes any posts via social media).

    What constitutes rudeness is very subjective. Some people consider the slightest disagreement to be rude. Some of the same people complain constantly about rudeness, yet the mods have allowed those posts to stand if they do not violate the TOS. In that case, one has to consider the possibility that they are overly sensitive or too quick to attempt to silence dissenting opinions.

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    • Admin

    It is possible to disagree without being disagreeable. However, a lot of that is up to the reader's interpretation. Written words aren't always the best mode of communication as it takes away so many non-verbal cues like tone of voice, body language, etc. I'm with other posters who have stated that it is best to report those posts you feel are not in line with TOS but that if it isn't edited/deleted by the mods that perhaps the issue isn't with the person who posted it but how it was interpreted by the person reporting it.

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    I agree that it is subjective. But we as nursed should be able to be professional to each other and if we don't know how to do that then there is a problem.

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    Might I add, some know they should be more professional and choose not to. I realize I am not in agreeance with many here, but I will not try to justify thay kind of treatment to someone.

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    I agree that it is subjective. But we as nursed should be able to be professional to each other and if we don't know how to do that then there is a problem.

    When I get paid to be here, I will be professional.

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    I agree that it is subjective. But we as nursed should be able to be professional to each other and if we don't know how to do that then there is a problem.

    Well, a couple of things: first, not everyone on this site is a nurse. And, second, personally, I do not feel that I need to conduct myself in the same professional manner while on my own time versus when I am in a professional setting and interacting with my peers.

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    ^^this^^

    Which speaks also to my point about stereotypes, expectations and, especially time off.

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    That is one way to view it, but here is where integrity comes into play.I will agree to disagree and we will just leave it at that.

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    What's integrity got to do with it?

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    As a person (not just a nurse) My morals tell me that I should treat others with respect. But that's my morals and I understand that others do not share the same morals. It's all ethical.

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