Triage Gems

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Specializes in Emergency Room.

A few recent gems from triage:

"pt complains of a fingernail stuck in her throat for 6 years; states it's causing fevers"

"pt fainted as his fiance cleaned his infected toe"

"pt arrives via ambulance for feeling tired and not wanting to take medication today"

"I'm allergic to all medications." "All medications?!" "Yes. they don't work."

"I have pain on the top of my head and my whole body is burning"

"I'm pregnant"

Laugh or cry??

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Specializes in Med/Surg, Ortho, ASC.

I hurt my ankle 3 weeks ago.

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Specializes in Reproductive & Public Health.

"I've been really itchy for the past few weeks and I think I have a yeast infection."

-the patient was a tech who worked at the LTC facility associated with my hospital, and she left work to come to the ER.

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Specializes in ER, LTAC, Nephrology.

Patient tripped, fell, broke acrylic nail, d/c home as non-emergent, patient insisted I bandage her up. Me - "here's a bandaid", her - "aren't you going to put it on?"

Patient c/o "not eating very well today, my blood sugar is low", glucose read high-normal, insisted he get admitted because he doesn't have any food at home. Offered to set up with social worker and meals on wheels but wanted a "clean bill of health". That included a resident doing a digital exam!

"Spilled coffee on foot"

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Fell down 9 stairs, wanted to know if they were hep c positive.

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Specializes in ER.

Pregnancy tests.

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Specializes in Emergency.

Anything that follows the words "oh, by the way...".

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Specializes in Emergency/Trauma/Critical Care Nursing.

Pt came in with complaint of being "too horny" and needed a shot for it. Followed up by "my sister is tired of me masturbating so much". Not sure about those family dynamics, but he came in two nights in a row! Lol

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Specializes in ICU.
Pt came in with complaint of being "too horny" and needed a shot for it. Followed up by "my sister is tired of me masturbating so much". Not sure about those family dynamics, but he came in two nights in a row! Lol

:eek:

I'm almost always glad I was an only child... but this just made me ecstatic that I was an only child.

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Specializes in Oncology.
Anything that follows the words "oh, by the way...".

Except when that's the critical part of the complaint. "I'm feeling weaker than normal, and, oh, by the way- I had a total pancreatectomy 3 weeks ago and had a 104 degree fever this morning."

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Specializes in ER, Med-surg.

"Leg hurting for 27 years." Patient was 27 years old.

Another lady came in c/o sunburn but just looked "off" and got put in a real room instead of fast track on the triage nurse's gut instinct. Her husband casually mentioned during the assessment that in addition to this darn sunburn, she'd been vomiting blood for the past 24 hours, and sure enough she vomited coffee grounds shortly after that.

He was really angry when we focused on the "vomiting blood" aspect and not the sunburn.

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Specializes in ER/Tele, Med-Surg, Faculty, Urgent Care.

Mosquito bite. Came in by ambulance. Bitten the previous day. Got mad when paramedic asked which bed & I said "lobby". Got madder when I added "she can walk there" as paramedics started to push gurney towards lobby door.

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