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Discussion

Sometimes it hits you...

It was five minutes till seven at the end of a long but good shift. I was on my way to fill my water bottle before giving report to the oncoming nurse. A nurse called out to me, "hey aren't you a family presence facilitator?" I am, she had just seen the mother of one of our little patients run the patients sibling out to the waiting room and then run back to the room (our unit is VERY large so we couldn't see exactly what was going on). I put my water bottle down, yelled to someone to watch my kids and went to investigate.

I came into a scene all to familiar in my cardiac intensive care unit. A plethora of doctors and nurses, a crash cart, a tiny baby getting chest compression that seem all to brutal on her tiny 7 pound body, and right outside the room is the mom, gripping the wall for support.

I'm too late to join in on the action, but that's not why I'm there, I go straight for mom. It's after hours and the weekend and we are waiting for the on call social worker. She grabs onto me for support. I explain everything that's going on and when the doctor yells out to call for ECMO I ask her if she wants to give her baby a kiss before the room becomes a sterile surgical field. She wants to, the doctor agrees. The crowd clears slightly while still flowing smoothly to set up for ecmo, the only people who stay at the bedside are the respiratory therapist and the person keeping her little heart beating, gripping my hand, mom leans in for a kiss and then turns and runs, dragging me out behind her.

Dad shows up and they fall into each others arms. They stay and watch while I update them and answer their questions. Baby stabilizes on ECMO and they return vigil to her bedside.

I've done this before and I'll do it again, but sometimes, like today, it really hits you, how unfair and painful this all is. A mama should never have to kiss her baby good bye while someone does chest compressions on them.

Days like this, I don't hate my job, but I wish it wasn't a necessary one.

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    Oh poor baby, and it is really a tough job to do.

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    This story is very moving. Thanks for sharing. You're amazing.

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    wow..waterworks...thank you for sharing. This mom was lucky to have you there for her.

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    I hope it hits you how much of a valued asset you are, not only within nursing, but in the world. That mother will remember many things about such a horrible ordeal, and she will never forget you and your actions. As much as it may hit you, I think it rings true for so many of us - this is it, this is the reality, and this is why we are here.

    Thank you for all you do.

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    Thank you for sharing!! You are an inspiration and I believe God put you in the place you are for people that truly need you.

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    (((((((((((((((UMCRN))))))))))))) Rough!

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    Moments like this is why I'm a PICU nurse. Being there for the parents as much as we are there for the patients is so integral to PICU nursing. I'm glad your hospital has nurses trained to be there for the parents when the social workers or chaplains can't be there in time. I have no doubt that mom was grateful for your presence and support.

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    Nurses like you make my drive to finish school and get into the field all the more. I know nursing is hard, but to have moments like these when you can reassure a patient or their family in their most vulnerable times just makes it all worth while. Thank you for the tears this morning, it was a heart moving story and a reminder to me that this is the type of nurse I want to become.

    Hearing comments like this also drives me to finish nursing school. Hearing stories like these show me that there are compassionate nurses out there that really do care about what they do.

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    Thank you for sharing :) I hope the lil one is okay now

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    Thank you for sharing :) I hope the lil one is okay now

    I haven't been at work since that night. I go back tomorrow. If she is ok she has a long long road ahead of her, but she sure is feisty!

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    I work in a hospice inpatient facility. Many of our nurses are previous L&D nurses. I think the common bond is we know how 'fragile' the family unit is when faced with life, the beginning or the ending. It is a family experience where everyones feelings and memories they will carry for a lifetime need a loving supporting prescence. The families will not remember our names, but they will remember the love and support they felt during these life changing events. I do not remember the nurses name with my first delivery at 18, but I still remember her love and compassion, her calming prescence in my caos of fear. I not not remember the nurses name when my second child was in ICU, but I remember his compassion for not only my son, but for my husband and I. We do make a difference even when it causes us pain. I am sure God is pleased for all the nurses that offer not only 'nursing' care, but also advocate for families emotions when they are in so very fragile. You sound like a loving nurse and I am glad you were there.

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    Thank you so much for being so kind and caring towards that Mother! You don't know how much that meant to her!! I am a nurse too, but two years ago I had a little girl and she ended up dying from NEC. I brought her into the world and then 11 days later I had to take my little baby off of a ventilator. It was the most horrible thing I've ever had to do/go through. What I remember the most (and I remember everything) is the kindness from the wonderful nurses that were around the NICU that my daughter was in. So I know that Mom is very greatful for what you have done for her/them! Thank you for being such an amazing nurse! (((HUGS)))

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